Unfinished And Frankly... Weird.

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Dark Poetry #2

Unfinished And Frankly... Weird.

FJiznit
Junior Member

since 2000-06-14

Posts 24

0 posted 2000-06-20 04:37 PM

I don't know what happened here.  It started off as a fairly interesting idea, but soon degenerated into a mass of almost-rhyming gibberish.  Still, I thought I'd post it anyway.  Here goes, ahem...

Flickering images of unbridled lust
Love given freely, take it, you must
Gratification assured, satisfaction guaranteed
Take the hand feeding basic animal needs

Voyeurism, Simulation, Stimulation....  Guilt...
Addiction or affliction, art or filth
Solitary, Independant, self-loathing or loving?
Religious, Insidious, Self-mistrusting, now becoming ...

Paranoid, Delusional,  a physical mess
Blinded by the obvious, vested interest
Looking for love?  Maybe closer than it seems
Break the thread of innocence, waste a vital seed

Love on demand, lust on tap
Ain't no church organ throbbing in your lap
Degrading yourself, maybe, if you choose to believe
The hand of God ain't as pleasing as it seems

gothicmoth
Member

since 2000-06-05

Posts 89

1 posted 2000-06-20 04:47 PM

Made perfect sense to me, but then I know someone like this. I've said (well typed) before that I think poems write themselves. If this one degenerated, it's probably because of the subject matter which it captured perfectly.

Nancee
Junior Member

since 2000-06-17

Posts 45
Australia

2 posted 2000-06-21 12:11 PM

"..WICKED.."

bluebrdy65
Member

since 2000-05-16

Posts 276
Gladys,

3 posted 2000-06-22 11:27 PM

This made sense to me
I thought it was great I had to hit print
then read again aloud.
great really great
Bluebrdy

Dark_kisses_Within
Senior Member

since 2000-03-21

Posts 680
Kansas

4 posted 2000-06-23 10:46 AM

And yet another great post! Keep up the wonderful work my Dear!

Peace

And sorry I havent been on much. Hope to talk to ya soon though

Hardrock
Senior Member

since 2000-02-14

Posts 948
New Hampshire, USA

5 posted 2000-06-23 08:54 PM

I'm not the brightest crayon in the box, but it made sense to me. Good work, well done. Hardrock

SpitFire
Member Elite

since 2000-04-19

Posts 2396

6 posted 2000-06-23 08:55 PM

~No, no, no,....not wierd at all!!! I love it. I usually write the first well thought out line or two of a poem and then it just takes off....that's the best,..when all that's inside pours out. Well done here. *Peace.

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