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gothicmoth
Member
since 2000-06-05
Posts 89


0 posted 2000-06-13 12:58 PM


I punched a wall today.
"My flesh doth wear the purple jewel."
I punched a wall today.
"The world can be so cruel."
I punched a wall today.
"Something ne'er felt, 'lo these many years."
I punched a wall today.
"The eyes ran out of tears."


note: I hate to rhyme.


© Copyright 2000 gothicmoth - All Rights Reserved
Dark Enchantress
Senior Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 1258
meet Morgana
1 posted 2000-06-13 03:33 PM


I don't like rhyming either...I'd rather just let my words flow onto the page...but this poem (although you hate rhyming) was great. "The eyes ran out of tears." was actually my favorite line because I relate to it so well but the whole poem was very deep which happens to be something I love.  

                                      D.E.



 Listen to your heart for it knows the way even when you don't.

~*Angel of Darkness*~

"So what are we, helpless? Puppets? No, the big moments are gonna come...you can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you really are. You'll see what I mean..." -Whistler

*+Daughter of Darkness+*


SpitFire
Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396

2 posted 2000-06-13 07:52 PM


~You've done great in your rhyming,...doesn't sound forced a bit  .  This poem holds a lot of strength....the images painted tell the tale.  Hope all is well with you.  BTW,...this made for a great read. Thanks. *Peace.
Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
3 posted 2000-06-13 07:57 PM


Hope you hard is ok?  Better your a wall than a person!!And the jewel reminds you of your mistake.  *hugs*  If you wanna talk with another fruitcake send an email..  

 I'll tell you this...... No eternal reward will forgive us now for wasting the dawn.....
~Isis~
(Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit)



gothicmoth
Member
since 2000-06-05
Posts 89

4 posted 2000-06-13 08:16 PM


Yeah I'm just peachy, the wall? Well that's another story. *wink* Yes I can rhyme, I just don't like too. Thanks for your replies and feelings. This one was cathartic.
lotharingia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-04
Posts 897
saarbruecken, Germany
5 posted 2000-06-14 04:12 AM


I hate to rhyme too, but sometimes it's fun. The title here is great, I like the irony with which you regard the situation. Get yourself a punch bag for next time though!
p.s. I'm stupid, so I had to look "cathartic" up in the dictionary!

 Lotharingia
"For God's sake, he's a poet. Poets are meant to feel miserable. Otherwise, what the hell are they here for? What are they going to write about?"
Tom Holland


taramw
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 738

6 posted 2000-06-14 06:13 AM


I got goosebumps reading that! Like it very much  
Joel the wolf
Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333
Angels Camp
7 posted 2000-06-15 10:03 AM


Well I love to ryme. hahaha
And I have punched wall to.
Damn near took a house down. haha
Yes a punching bag is better, you hands don't get all puffy. hahaha

Joel.

 I howl a mournful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel.

JP
Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343
Loomis, CA
8 posted 2000-06-15 10:15 AM


"Purple jewel..."  I like that.

 Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
JP

"Everything is your own damn fault, if you are any good." E. Hemmingway


brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
9 posted 2000-06-15 03:36 PM


that poem packed a punch... powerful but punching walls wouldn't solve anything.

I hope you find a better more productive solution.

 ------------------------
"Take nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time".

Baltimore Grotto

"To be nobody-but-yourself-in a world which is doing its best night and day, to make you everybody else - means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting."

E.E Cummings.

"Art is a lie which makes us realise the truth." Pablo Picasso

"We Irish are too poetical to be poets, we are a nation of brilliant failures" Oscar Wilde


-----






gothicmoth
Member
since 2000-06-05
Posts 89

10 posted 2000-06-15 04:23 PM


Wow 5 out of 8 replies took me literally. Oh I weep for the death of symbolism. Thank you all, though. I'm glad you enjoyed it anyway. *smile*
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