navwin » Archives » Voices on the Web » I looked back
Voices on the Web
Post A Reply Post New Topic I looked back Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

0 posted 2000-07-26 11:07 AM


            I looked back

Dry rot ate the steps of wood
All the places I had stood.
Brambles pad the path and yard
Abandon hangs sad facade.

Uncaring stared the moon on high
Uncertain seemed the wind to sigh
And silent trees laid ghostly shade
Like painted Halloween brocade.

Haphazard hung the cobweb frills
From hollow windows empty sills
And only sorrow gorged the glean        
Mocking me in every scene.

Dissolved away in simple truth
Past relics of my naive youth
And queasy load my ducts with tears
And heavy grew the weight of years.

The past is gone, a sad amen  
The bitter sweet will not again.


© Copyright 2000 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
1 posted 2000-07-26 12:30 PM


Caught it and read it and voted already..it is very very good!
Geoffrey Sonnen
Member
since 2000-07-05
Posts 142
Reading, PA USA
2 posted 2000-07-26 01:18 PM


I'm not kidding, this is absolutely awesome. I wish I could vote a hundred times ! I hope you don't mind that I share this with others. The way you phrased this shows a very unique talent and for me, this is a "Keeper".

Awe-struck,  Geoff

L Tiuch
Member
since 2000-02-04
Posts 151
NY
3 posted 2000-07-26 01:32 PM


Beautiful...you have my vote.  Linda
Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
4 posted 2000-07-26 02:59 PM


Seymour, this was brilliant, voted voted voted.
Why not just cut the grass, new memories need to be made.  

Parker

Heather Miller
Member
since 2000-07-19
Posts 409
Bryan, Ohio USA
5 posted 2000-07-26 05:44 PM


Very good.......
LITL,
Heather

With God all things are possible.


BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919
New York, USA
6 posted 2000-07-26 06:53 PM


Seymour this is so melancholy....and beautifully written.  Bonnie
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
7 posted 2000-07-26 09:19 PM


Ethome,
Thanks for the read and vote.
Geoffrey,
Thanks for the awesome.
L Tiuch,
Thanks for the beautiful and vote.
Haleyja,
Thanks for the brilliant.
Heather,
Thanks for the vote.
BSC, Thanks Bonnie

AVANTI
Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 664
INDIA/MAHARASHTRA/PUNE
8 posted 2000-07-27 06:47 AM


very well written witha  nice flow...


If all was light...then I would have never learnt the dark...from which such truth evolves
from which evolves the light...
Avanti Rao


Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
9 posted 2000-07-27 07:40 AM


Avanti,
Thank you for the nice comment and vote.

Fred Hobbs
Member
since 1999-06-08
Posts 329
Tallahassee, Florida, US
10 posted 2000-07-27 07:46 AM


Sy,
This is great!  This definitely belongs in the book.  Outstanding in every way.

fh

Flower Power
Junior Member
since 2000-07-26
Posts 29
Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
11 posted 2000-07-27 09:24 AM


I liked it a lot.
It's almost like a melody.  It'd be so easy to add music to it.

Love,
Stephanie

[This message has been edited by Flower Power (edited 07-27-2000).]

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

12 posted 2000-07-27 09:33 PM


Very touching, Seymour, I can relate well to this one.

Denise

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
13 posted 2000-07-28 10:11 AM


Fred, Your comments mean allot, thanks

Flower, Thanks for the flower.

Denise, And I can relate to you. *L*

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
14 posted 2000-07-29 05:39 PM


Oh, This is a wonderful poem, well written in perfect meter.I can only vote once, but I've got 2 thumbs up
Liz

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
15 posted 2000-07-30 10:36 AM


Ah yes, thought I was experience deja vu...{~,^} click

Karilea
When you want to be loved, look within...KRJ

dgvarner
Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida
16 posted 2000-07-30 03:48 PM


WOW!!...i mean, wow...  and i'm not even sure what else to say...!  this is absolutely wonderful..i'm in awe at how youve capture this moment..such are childhood places when you go back and shatter the remembrance with reality..

"everything changes but the change.." -corey hart

dg


"Half of what i say is meaningless; but i say it so that the other half may reach you." -Kahlil Gibran

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
17 posted 2000-07-30 06:15 PM


Elizabeth,
Thanks for the vote and two thumbs up. Sy

Sunshine,
Deja vu is a great compliment. *L*

Dgvarner,
Thanks for the WOW and wonderful comment.

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Voices on the Web » I looked back

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary