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Small Pain in My Chest
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Small Pain in My Chest |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA 
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The soldier boy was sitting calmly underneath that tree. As I approached it, I could see him beckoning to me. The battle had been long and hard and lasted through the night And scores of figures on the ground lay still by morning's light. "I wonder if you'd help me, sir", he smiled as best he could. "A sip of water on this morn would surely do me good. We fought all day and fought all night with scarcely any rest - A sip of water for I have a small pain in my chest." As I looked at him, I could see the large stain on his shirt All reddish-brown from his warm blood mixed in with Asian dirt. "Not much", said he. "I count myself more lucky than the rest. They're all gone while I just have a small pain in my chest." "Must be fatigue", he weakIy smiled. "I must be getting old. I see the sun is shining bright and yet I'm feeling cold. We climbed the hill, two hundred strong, but as we cleared the crest, The night exploded and I felt this small pain in my chest." "I looked around to get some aid - the only things I found Were big, deep craters in the earth - bodies on the ground. I kept on firing at them, sir. I tried to do my best, But finally sat down with this small pain in my chest." "I'm grateful, sir", he whispered, as I handed my canteen And smiled a smile that was, I think, the brightest that I've seen. "Seems silly that a man my size so full of vim and zest, Could find himself defeated by a small pain in his chest." "What would my wife be thinking of her man so strong and grown, If she could see me sitting here, too weak to stand alone? Could my mother have imagined, as she held me to her breast, That I'd be sitting HERE one day with this pain in my chest?" "Can it be getting dark so soon?" He winced up at the sun. "It's growing dim and I thought that the day had just begun. I think, before I travel on, I'll get a little rest .......... And, quietly, the boy died from that small pain in his chest. I don't recall what happened then. I think I must have cried; I put my arms around him and I pulled him to my side And, as I held him to me, I could feel our wounds were pressed The large one in my heart against the small one in his chest. [This message has been edited by Balladeer (edited 06-21-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Please edit so we can vote for it....I adore this one..love all of yours sir but adore this one.  I'll be back to vote! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Thanks, deVine one. It was Nan's fault!! (well, why not?) All done! |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Got it! Thank you so much. As you know this one is such a favorite of mine. I'll stuff the ballot box if it doesn't get in!!!! |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
yep, stuffing votes in here  I think everything you write could go in the book |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Possible submission? Probable, more like it! Sunshine ~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. Helen Keller ~~~ |
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Justbleu Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329Oregon, Originally From Alaska :) |
Very probable 'Deer!! I want to cry!! I LOVE this piece!! Very deep and tender words!! (By the way, I came across the repost that X Angel posted of yours!! I look forward to more Free Verse from you)!!!!!!  Bridgette "Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again. To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
I would be absolutely honoured Balladeer if by some chance you and I were in the same poetry book. You are awesome! I love your work so much. *smiles* This was an incredible poem that moved me, made my eyes mist over and left me aching. I like dat!  ~Heather |
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FlyHigh Member
since 2000-06-21
Posts 84Bekkestua, Norway |
Yes, I agree. Moving one. Love it... Geir Jakobsen -- "Luck affects everything. Let your hook always be cast; in the stream where you least expect it there will be a fish." Ovid (BC 43-18 AD, Roman P |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
YES! YES! My favorite! Thanks Liz |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Click... |
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Not A Poet Member Elite
since 1999-11-03
Posts 3885Oklahoma, USA |
Exceptionally moving without being morbid or melodramatic. It would bring a tear to the eye of the most hardened, I think. Pete |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
I'm sort of at a loss for words here Baladeer ... truly incredible writing. The flow, the story/concept, the closing line ... they all just wove together so beautifully. I loved this! (click) Best wishes, /Kit |
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CMGrimm Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685USA |
Should I comment or just sit here and cry??? Wonderful piece...thanks for reposting.. chris Never be a carbon copy of anybody...make your own impressions. - ANON. |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Man... Balladeer. There are many of yours that make me smile, a few that make me think (and more than one that's made me scratch my head in wonder) But this... this put a pain in my heart. Strong, powerful, staggering. Almost overwhelming. Wow. C. |
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Angel Senior Member
since 1999-07-02
Posts 551Pennsylvania |
This is so sad. It made me cry. Definitely belongs in the book. ~Susie "If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man's life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility." ~Henry W |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
I remember this one very well. |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
I remember this one very well! Still causes the tearful eye. Geez, you could probably get the whole book to yourself with your work  It's that good! |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
One of my favorites of yours, Michael! You got MY vote! yep... you sure do! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
pure and simple ... you are amazing jm |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Possibilities? I'd say it's an absolute shoe-in! One of my favorites of yours! Denise |
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Novacaine For The Soul Member
since 2000-05-26
Posts 122New Orleans |
dear balladeer, this is absolutely beautiful... touching and sweetly sorrowful... you're an exquisite poet sir balladeer, quickly becoming a favorite of mine... sincerely, a sad tomato you're such a beautiful freak... i wish there were more just like you... |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Balladeer~ This is such a poignant piece of pure poetry from a heart of gold. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Colin Senior Member
since 1999-06-05
Posts 596Callington, Cornwall, England |
I told you I liked this in Open so I won't make yer head swell by saying it again here  Eric. "We are the music makers and we are the makers of dreams." - Willy Wonka. |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Wonderful work, Balladeer, a real tear jerker, too! Coriinne |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
A favorite of mine, as well, dear sir. ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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Rex Allen McCoy Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863Sippin a Timmy's in London |
This one gets a small ballot in the chest |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
Well there ya go and make a grown man cry. You write these poems to make men cry, bring us down to our basic element. Well It a good thing I'm holding it in or I'd forget to vote. Parker |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
Yep, yep, yep wonderful stuff hon I'll tell you this...... No eternal reward will forgive us now for wasting the dawn..... ~Isis~ (Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit) |
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linda munday Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 315Adelaide, Australia |
Balladeer, That little box has just been checked for this one. You have amazing talent. I wish I could write like that. You have set a goal for me, higher than I am afraid I can ever reach, but at least I'll have fun trying. Linda M. |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
ditto to the above. |
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A Romantic Heart Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496Forever In Your Heart |
Excellant Balladeer!!!! my vote for such a talented man!!! |
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Jeffrey Carter
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
Ok, I give up on trying to decide my favorite of yours, it's just too damn' hard LOL The last line in this one grabs you and shakes you to the very core.....extremely excellent All my love, Jeffrey |
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Yu Lan Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462New Zealand |
wow.. woops, I just realised I was holding my breath, lol.. ^_^ this is geat.. Lynne "He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened." Lao-tsu |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Rather than to add another comment I shall simply *vote* |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
This is wonderful, you have brought reality in to this so perfectly, thank you so much. Love, Cerenity "God doesn't have to be reminded that we exist. We have to be reminded that He exist!" (Writer Unknown) |
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T Member
since 2000-04-27
Posts 107USA |
Man!! I seem to have this big apple stuck in my throat. |
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Geoffrey Sonnen Member
since 2000-07-05
Posts 142Reading, PA USA |
You know, Honestly I can't even find words. Your last verse floored me. I am in tears. More than just moving, it bespeaks what needs to be acknowledged, the giving your Life, your Heart, for what you believe, and compels one to wonder what all this hate, and the pain and loss that it causes is for. You definitely have my vote. Peace, Geoffrey |
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Romy Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170Plantation, Florida |
you have my vote! This is really wonderful! Debbie |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
Bravo, Michael, Bravo! Kathleen |
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MagnoliaBlue Member
since 2000-05-12
Posts 367 |
Deep feelings here...I will just ditto all the other wonderful remarks, dry my tears and go vote. Wonderful! Fantastic writing here! MagnoliaBlue ~My Skipper Jim I love you! Your Lady June~ |
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AVANTI Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 664INDIA/MAHARASHTRA/PUNE |
great piece of work as always... If all was light...then I would have never learnt the dark...from which such truth evolves from which evolves the light... Avanti Rao |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
It's always my fault...  |
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Fred Hobbs Member
since 1999-06-08
Posts 329Tallahassee, Florida, US |
Balladeer, This has always been one of my favorites. Yout got my vote (again!). fh |
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Gossamerwings Member
since 2000-07-18
Posts 207 |
Balladeer, This is SUPERB! The style,the flow,the words, everything. You do this so well. Gossamerwings ;) |
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Heather Miller Member
since 2000-07-19
Posts 409Bryan, Ohio USA |
This made me cry to remember the stories my grandfather would tell about when he was in war and all his friends that fell.  LITL, Heather PS VOTED With God all things are possible. |
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Heather Miller Member
since 2000-07-19
Posts 409Bryan, Ohio USA |
one more thing, would you mind if I printed this out to go in our local paper for all to see here? It would be loved!!!!!!! LITL, Heather With God all things are possible. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
{~,^} Sunny ~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. Helen Keller ~~~ When you want to be loved, look within...KRJ |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
*Applauding as she clicks vote, vote, vote* Balladeer...this has always been one of my favorite of all your works and still remains so. An excellent piece of writing my dear friend |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Another bump! |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Today is Remembrance Day in Canada, and I love to read this to my grand kids. This is just an incredible piece of writing. Kindly re-post for today? |
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sasanka7 Junior Member
since 2010-11-17
Posts 30 |
Wonderful ! but saying simply wonderful is not enough. If the warmongers could read this poem and think a while, replacing him beneath the tree the history would have been different. Thanks a lot. I adore your sensation and feelings for the soldiers. Thanks for sharing a nice poem |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
I thank you, sasanka7, for such a kind reply and I welcome you to Passions. I hope you have a wonderful stay here. Best to you, Michael |
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