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kaile
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singapore

0 posted 2000-06-20 07:28 AM



                I(a
                red
                 R
                 O
                 S
                 E
                in
        g r a s s p a t c h)
               catch
      
                ing


      
        

© Copyright 2000 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved
kaile
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singapore
1 posted 2000-06-20 08:57 PM


perhaps no one has understood this poem

"I" can mean "eye"
which leads to this:

1)the red rose is eye catching

2)"I" being the red rose speaking

pls do comment its rather demoralizing to see a poem which you are really proud of shunned and cast aside

JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA
2 posted 2000-06-21 02:51 PM


Hey, don't fret, Kaile! I like it, even though my understanding may be diff.  Everyone has thier own interpratations.  Which is good. Wow! I've been away from the computer for only one day and look at all I'm missing.  

Joy

JP
Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343
Loomis, CA
3 posted 2000-06-22 12:45 PM


hehe, demoralizing is it?  You have a point there. The sting of 0 responses is a most irritating and sorrowful sting indeed, one many here know all too well.

I've read this work, looked at your comments and am reading it again.  Abstract poetry is not one of my strong suits so bear with me as I struggle to comprehend your meaning...

Keep posting  

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
JP

"Everything is your own damn fault, if you are any good." E. Hemmingway

Ryan
Member
since 1999-06-10
Posts 297
Kansas
4 posted 2000-06-22 01:53 PM


I like the experimental quality of this one.  It definitely deserves to be in the book.

Ryan


I like too many things and get all confused and hung-up running from one falling star to another till i drop. This is the night, what it does to you. I had nothing to offer anybody except my own confusion.
—Jack Kerouac


Munda
Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands
5 posted 2000-06-25 04:41 PM


I never saw this form of poetry before and I must say, it's different from everything I read thus far and thank you for explaining it.  
kaile
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singapore
6 posted 2000-07-01 09:58 PM


thanx Joy 14, JP, Ryan and MUNDA for replying
Sven
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since 1999-11-23
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East Lansing, MI USA
7 posted 2000-07-02 02:30 AM


EXCELLENT kaile!!!

This is a superb example of a concrete poem. . . it's perfect in its form and function. . . reminded me of why I like this form so much, it's hard to get it just right isn't it without knowing a lot of HTML??

I'm going to get to this one in my own series in Open, but you've done well with this one. . .

BRAVO!!!

---------------------------------------------------------

That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl



Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

8 posted 2000-07-02 05:56 AM


BRAVA!

Personally - I think this is fantastic...these poems are not at all easy to do, I also think this book should be full of a variety of type of poetry - and this most definitely has my vote...

K

Brad
Member Ascendant
since 1999-08-20
Posts 5705
Jejudo, South Korea
9 posted 2000-07-03 03:24 AM


I think this would make a strong addition.

Brad

Corazon
Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209

10 posted 2000-07-03 11:03 AM


i write only freestyle and am not familiar with this type of poem, but with your explanation, and a reread, i do think that it would be a nice addition to the book, poetry has many different shapes  
Mon Cherie
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since 2001-10-31
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Land of Never-ending Summers
11 posted 2001-11-17 11:14 AM


Cool, Kaile...
Didn't know that these are called concrete poems. Oh well, I've still lots to learn...

But um, hehe... I do think that it'd be better if that really looked like a rose, rather than an upside down cross.  

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