navwin » Archives » Voices on the Web » What Will Tomorrow Bring?
Voices on the Web
Post A Reply Post New Topic What Will Tomorrow Bring? Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA

0 posted 2000-06-18 10:27 PM


The bus had left the corner
Where she stood,
Clothes soaked with mud
She missed her only way out
Now all that was left to do
Was wait
'Till the next one came again
She wiped away the dirt and grime
And the tears that lingered in her eyes.
Sobbing at passing strangers
Made her feel self conscious
As well as pitiful and pained.
The reason she was here was just...
To get away from it all
A new place
A new life
Where nobody knew her name.
Another body in the crowd
Of passing city strangers
Was really all she wanted to be.
A single bag was at her side
Containing all she needed to survive
She opened the latch to retrieve some change
That lingered somewhere inside.
Getting up from the curb with newly dried, red eyes and face
She walked to the saxophonist playing a block away,
And placed her last two quarters carefully
Into the old, beaten, leather case,
And she knew looking at the man from which the passionate music flowed,
There was an image of an unknown tomorrow, an image of such silent fear
That matched her very own
Like a broken, one way mirror.

© Copyright 2000 Kristen Joy Jacobus - All Rights Reserved
SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
1 posted 2000-06-18 10:34 PM


Joy~ This is GREAT!   -SEA

Live,Love,Laugh :) ~SueB


Justbleu
Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329
Oregon, Originally From Alaska :)
2 posted 2000-06-19 02:20 AM


This was sad!!  But i liked it!!!  

Bridgette


"Creation of woman from the rib of Man: She was not made from his head to top him; nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him; but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be loved." -Unknown


bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

3 posted 2000-06-19 02:24 AM


Wow, what great images and word choice. I loved "pitiful and pained." And that she used her last bit of change on a street musician, trusting more in tomorrow than she lets on. Awesome!

Mike

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

4 posted 2000-06-19 04:56 PM


awesome indeed...
i ditto everthing bsq jsust said
those lines were perfect!!
jm

X Angel
Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521
Oregon
5 posted 2000-06-19 07:04 PM


*check* *check* *check*
drat I can only check that lil box once...
neat poem! I really liked this!
~Heather

wayoutwalt
Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870
TEXAS (it's all big)
6 posted 2000-06-20 01:30 PM


oman tops in my book yuh
Colin
Senior Member
since 1999-06-05
Posts 596
Callington, Cornwall, England
7 posted 2000-06-20 02:27 PM


This is great! I sense that she'd tried to give up all her friends, everyone she knew, yet in the end she sought friendship with the unknown saxophonist? Go on, tell me please! am I right?
loved it whatever the outcome  

"We are the music makers and we are the makers of dreams." - Willy Wonka.

JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA
8 posted 2000-06-22 11:09 PM


This is one of my personal favs. of mine. lol. If it gets in the book or not, I'm just glad I got a chance to share it again with you all.  Thanks for all your replies.  

Joy

Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
9 posted 2000-06-22 11:31 PM


Joy a sad life she leads, I too think this is one of your best hon, it got my vote!!  

I'll tell you this...... No eternal reward will forgive us now for wasting the dawn.....
~Isis~
(Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit)


kaile
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
10 posted 2000-07-02 04:16 AM


Joy 14, i like the narrative tone and the smooth easy read...was particularly thrilled at the ending when she spent her last quarters on the street musician....such openness of heart she had for the uncertain future...What a heroine she is!!!

btw,thanx for replying to my "Awe(a concrete poem)...if i may ask, will you pls look at it again and tell me what did you interpret by my poem then?as u have said, different people see different things and i am curious at to the "message" you saw then....
Thank You

tracie66
Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713
Australia
11 posted 2000-07-02 07:20 AM


This is so wonderfully done...good on you  
Tracie~


Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe


Mike
Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462

12 posted 2000-07-02 11:59 AM


Nice poem...  I liked.
ESP
Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556
Floating gently on a cloud....
13 posted 2000-07-02 12:53 PM


Glad you are sharing it again, Joy, cos this is my first read of it!
Stunning!!!

Love and hugs,
Lizzie


"Poetry is the true expression of my soul, it is my ultimate means of communication. It is my rainbow of delight."

BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919
New York, USA
14 posted 2000-07-18 08:50 AM


This is wonderful, glad I found it.  Bonnie
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Voices on the Web » What Will Tomorrow Bring?

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary