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Open Poetry #9
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Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California

0 posted 2000-09-18 04:27 PM



Down Down

Down down
into the cool gray chimera  
moss colored ocean curl

I salt my skin
and drench my hair,
‘til its tendrils cork joyfully
down down
until it floats like sea grass
and tiny marble-eyed fish swim through it

down down
to a sound muffled with tenderness
a song that bursts with wishes
for if I could dance in this sea shine
you would be my partner
and grace would clothe our movement
and everything would be yearning up
hair on end swaying
arms raised and tangled
my legs would hold me to you

I would see your bubbled words
I love you floating to the surface
and popping there in little colored explosions
that no one could hear, but me.




In the dew of little things,
the heart finds its morning
and is refreshed.
(ee cummings)

© Copyright 2000 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
1 posted 2000-09-18 04:38 PM


Wow Martie....did you ever take me for a swim with this one.  Lovely write and now please listen to the sea shine around me as I say Thank you for all that.


Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
2 posted 2000-09-18 04:42 PM


This is so tender and beautiful Martie.
Thank you for sharing such a lovely weave
...or would that be wave?  

Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
3 posted 2000-09-18 04:45 PM


A Sea Dance with "little colored explosions" - your imagery is incredible - incredibly beautiful.
Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
4 posted 2000-09-18 09:08 PM


Mark--The sea tells me that you are sweet..thank you.

Butterflies--yup!  A wave for sure!

Bill--movement under water is so gracefull and dance-like...I'm glad you liked my colored explosions....and the imagery..well, you should have been there.  

Balladeer
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since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
5 posted 2000-09-18 09:13 PM


WOWEE! I should have been there!!! What a picture you paint here, Martie. he hair flowing up, the bubbles, the arm, the words of love....geesh! You really know how to get down down!!!  
Effigy
Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486
disbelief
6 posted 2000-09-18 09:18 PM


nice. what a lovely picture.
BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919
New York, USA
7 posted 2000-09-18 09:19 PM


Such a beautiful scene you have painted with your words Martie....You brought it all to life in this terrific piece.  Bonnie
Denise
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

8 posted 2000-09-18 09:24 PM


To the beach, everybody!! Won't Martie be surprised when we all show up at her front door with our beach towels...and suitcases.....hehehe  

Beautiful poem, Martie!  

Denise

Alwye
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Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
9 posted 2000-09-18 09:44 PM


Stunning imagery...I loved the pictures this evoked in my mind.  You have such a unique talent Martie, and I love to read your works.  

*Krista Knutson*

"Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart." -Confucious

Martie
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
10 posted 2000-09-19 11:01 AM


Balladeer--and you know how to make me feel, up up.

Effigy--thanks for stopping by and letting me know you thought this lovely...I'm glad

Bonnie--I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

Denise--I wish you all would

Krista--what a nice thing to say..thank you.

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
11 posted 2000-09-19 11:07 AM


Martie - you have mastered free verse so well.  I love the imagery and the thoughts of the ocean changing everything.  careful here, Long John... stay away from that verse about the legs   .  As for inviting us down to the beach, lil Lorelei will be at your doorstep before you know it!  She is a beach bunny from her childhood days.
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