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grandiloquent
Member

since 1999-07-08

Posts 104
Midwest America

0 posted 2000-09-15 02:19 AM

she creeps up, sliding smoothly
from cool linen into heavy air
yawns open her arms to the ceiling
Silhouette of
moon back and rolling belly
hair in straggles silken, twisted
pouring over her perfect shoulders,
dances around the moles between her scapulas
shadows fold inside her fingers bend over
the tower of neck and jaw
dark blends her features to a delicate black stone and
silently, suddenly she turns
gaze boring out of the nothingness
Blind, he searches for something his eyes can hold,
a word to shove her irradiance into

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

1 posted 2000-09-15 03:12 AM

I do not blame you for your impatience now...absolutely stunning....

Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-21

Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song

2 posted 2000-09-15 03:49 AM

Awesome read. Welcome to Passions and hope to see more of your works. Loved the flow and the cadence to this one and the whole thing just ties together superbly.

Beth
Member

since 2000-07-06

Posts 468
WA, Australia

3 posted 2000-09-15 04:10 AM

~Brilliant Read...Thanks for sharing and I hope to see more of you in Passions!!~

~Cherie~

Kethry
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-29

Posts 9082
Victoria Australia

4 posted 2000-09-15 06:19 AM

grandiloquent. Eloquent indeed.
Smoothly done and vivid to boot, Excellent read.

Be well
Kethry

"It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures;
but it is the loss that shapes the image,
gathers the flowers weaves the garland."-

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

5 posted 2000-09-15 08:05 PM

Wow, great writing here!

grandiloquent
Member

since 1999-07-08

Posts 104
Midwest America

6 posted 2000-09-16 01:16 AM

Serenity, thank you so much for the welcome. I did not mean to present myself as impatient (when I was much more, frankly, scared). As soon as another post was made in front of mine it received 18 replies! I was afraid of being buried before any eyes could catch my post. How glad I am to see that a days' wait, instead, brings a slew of back-browsing visitors. Thank you each and every for your comments, and the time taken to post them. I look forward to digging back through previous posts to discover all of your writing styles.

[This message has been edited by grandiloquent (edited 09-16-2000).]

Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite

since 2000-08-04

Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware

7 posted 2000-09-16 01:56 AM

three for 3 by my count - and of the 3 this just blows me away

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