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Open Poetry #9
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BloomingRose
Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092
Florida

0 posted 2000-09-12 02:18 PM


Forever My Love


Empty eyes stare, with unshed tears
the vast ocean surf pounds the shore
as swirling waters beckon her in

His face she see's in the mirror of her soul...
he calls to her from a distant shore
her ashen face reflects in moonlight
one last fallen tear


Suddenly she feels a touch ...
take my hand, I'll dry your tears
no more fears to drag you down
no swirling water can make you sound

Take my hand, I'll not let go
I promise forever, I'll love you so

~BloomingRose~




© Copyright 2000 DebraS. - All Rights Reserved
Trew
Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365
Ottawa, Canada
1 posted 2000-09-13 02:39 AM


I must admit, I'm at a bit of a loss.  Perhaps it is the hour clouding my mind.  
I'm not quite sure whether there is a rescue of love, or a vision of despair, at the end of this.  Perhaps this was the intent?
Either way, I enjoy any poem that sets my mind wandering.  This definitely achieved that status.  A very dark, but moving poem, BloomingRose.

Trev.

tracie66
Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713
Australia
2 posted 2000-09-13 02:46 AM


BR~
This is an interesting piece indeed and one that I enjoyed greatly...well done
Tracie~


Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe


BloomingRose
Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092
Florida
3 posted 2000-09-13 09:10 AM


This is one of dispair, but love prevailed in the end. Love hopes all things.

Deb  

X Angel
Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521
Oregon
4 posted 2000-09-13 09:14 AM


drat and at first I thought it was going to be a mermaid poem! *wink*
Nice one here though, love should triumph in the end.
*hugs*
~Heather

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
5 posted 2000-09-13 09:15 AM


Rose - I found this to be a sweet story of salvation from despair.. of finding love, and being lifted by it.  The metaphor of walking into the surf because love is so far from grasp, and then being saved by love, which was there all along.  Very well done.
vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
6 posted 2000-09-13 11:35 AM


Nicely done!!!!!
Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
7 posted 2000-09-14 02:08 AM


In "true" love time will bring it to the surface, sometimes it just takes awhile.  Lovely read and I  enjoyed the ending.
BloomingRose
Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092
Florida
8 posted 2000-09-14 08:37 PM


Thank you all for kind words. I guess this one is a bit odd.
Could indeed have been a mermaid...

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
9 posted 2000-09-15 09:19 PM


Beautiful. . . just beautiful. . .

------------------------------------------------------

That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl


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