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Open Poetry #9
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Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

0 posted 2000-09-01 08:34 AM


Shadows mark
their outline -
silhouetted
shapes
taking shape,
forming
a formation
in foggy
backdrops --
crystalline
beads like pearls
d
r
o
p
from
the little girl's
stained-glass
eyes.

She cries
in vain
for the moment
had passed
when he had
promised
to meet
beneath the
evening-coloured
billboard
which then
would have
smiled, saying
'Love is what
I have for you'

Alas!
streams of tears
are what she
had to shed
instead
of her heart's
tumult, anxiety or
lovesongs

And out there
in the fading light
fate enveloped a
dark-filled shroud
pitilessly painful
leaving her
in a state of
mourning,
pitch-black
an unmarried widow
mourning the lovebird
that never perched
on the bench
within her soul
and she let go
another
teary
d
r
o
p
.
.
.

© Copyright 2000 Sudhir Iyer - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2000-09-01 09:22 AM


"crystalline bead like pearls..."

your imagery sweeps away all senses...

thank you Sudhir, for such a lovely piece...

ma miller
Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 806

2 posted 2000-09-01 09:28 AM


Sudhir ... you're on your game with this one ... well composed, my friend ...
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
3 posted 2000-09-01 12:07 PM


Sudhir, this is lovely!    
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
4 posted 2000-09-01 01:10 PM


Oh Sudhir--I do love your words..."Stained- glass eyes" and "evening-coloured billboard"...wow...great poem!
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
5 posted 2000-09-02 09:17 AM


Karilea, This is a beautiful compliment, and coming from you, I am touched... Thank you so much  

MA, my friend, thank you ...  

Poet deVine, it is an honour to see your name in my thread ... thank you...  

Martie, Thank you so much for your very kind words...

Regards,
sudhir


[This message has been edited by Sudhir Iyer (edited 09-02-2000).]

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
6 posted 2000-09-02 09:32 AM


I always feel your poems, and this one tugged at the sentiments. Outstanding presentation
Liz

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
7 posted 2000-09-02 09:38 AM


This was exquisite Sudhir! It's wonderful to watch you try these different styles ... you masterfully conquer each and every one. This flowed just beautifully and the imagery and storyline was lovely. Well done!

Best wishes,
/Kit

Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
8 posted 2000-09-02 09:44 AM




I still say I want to be just like you when I grow up.   Sudhir my friend...your growth is exceptional and you always leave me in awe at the easeness of which you pen.  You have captured a bit of essence of life in this one..more than a bit actually..lovely read.

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
9 posted 2000-09-02 09:47 AM


Sudhir~

What lovely images you bring to mind ...

'mourning the lovebird
that never perched
on the bench
within her soul'


Oh, my !
May I tell you that your talent is showing !
Delightfully so !
~*Marge*~


~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com



Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
10 posted 2000-09-02 06:53 PM


Liz, If only I can express how much I am honoured... Thanks  

Kit, your words are great words of praise for me always... thanks  

Mark, you are ever present... Thanks  

Marge, I am so glad that you are delighted... Thanks  

regards to all, my dear friends,
sudhir

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
11 posted 2000-09-02 06:57 PM


Nicely done, Sudhir - I love your formatting.. It really adds to the essence of your work..
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
12 posted 2000-09-02 07:28 PM


Nancy,
Now I am proud of my work.... your kind words are flattering this soul  

Thank you...

regards,
sudhir

Mona Lisa
Member
since 1999-08-25
Posts 100
Halifax, Nova Scotia
13 posted 2000-09-02 07:40 PM


Wow!  What imagery!  You outdid yourself on this one.  This is truly a lovely poem.  Keep up the excellent work!


Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
14 posted 2000-09-02 07:40 PM


....the lovebird that never perched on the bench within her soul... such beautiful words, Sudhir. Your poetry continues to glow,,,
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
15 posted 2000-09-04 09:17 AM


Mona Lisa,
Thanks a lot for coming by and for your kind words...

Sir Balladeer,
These are words I will cherish for a long long time... Thanks  

regards,
sudhir


Beth
Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 468
WA, Australia
16 posted 2000-09-04 09:37 AM


~A very lovely piece indeed.
Loved the imagery~


~Cherie~

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
17 posted 2000-09-04 11:43 AM


Oh Thank you so much Beth (Cherie)...

regards,
sudhir

doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
18 posted 2000-09-04 12:03 PM


(((((( hugs )))))))

i love it! thank you for writing and posting this. it's exquisite in it's sadness and beauty.  

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
19 posted 2000-09-04 04:04 PM


Doreen,
and I thank you so much for the inspiration and of course for your "exquisite" response...

regards,
sudhir

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

20 posted 2000-09-04 08:04 PM


"stained glass eyes" is nothing less than brilliant! Sudhir, you are getting better and better.


Kathleen


X Angel
Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521
Oregon
21 posted 2000-09-04 08:43 PM


this was really beautiful
~H

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
22 posted 2000-09-05 04:32 AM


Kathleen,
Thank you so much for your kind words...

Heather,
Many Thanks for coming by and your lovely response...

regards,
sudhir
P.S. Thanks once again are due to Doreen for the inspiration...

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