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Open Poetry #9
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mariee66
Senior Member
since 2000-01-30
Posts 596
Recess, OfYourMind

0 posted 2000-08-28 08:27 PM


Like needles
Pricking, searing.
Each nerve struck,
Firing
Senses raging out of control.
In a whirlwind
Sense of glare.
Remorse
Feelings left barren,
An action that can never reverse.

  

© Copyright 2000 Marie E. - All Rights Reserved
Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
1 posted 2000-08-29 12:17 PM


Speaking out of anger and without thought can and has killed many a bond.  You have penned wise words of warning and done it well.
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
2 posted 2000-08-30 04:12 AM


An excellent poem, full of wisdom and all done is so few words... impressive to say the least...

regards,
sudhir

[This message has been edited by Sudhir Iyer (edited 08-30-2000).]

sonjes
Senior Member
since 2000-02-18
Posts 564
North Carolina
3 posted 2000-08-31 03:01 PM


You packed a lot of meaning into a short space. very well done!

Don't care what people say
Just follow your own way
Don't give up and use the chance
To return to innocence.
-Enigma


Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
4 posted 2000-08-31 03:11 PM


words cut deeper than any knife and the wounds they infict never heal...great job this
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
5 posted 2000-08-31 03:26 PM


Mariee~
WONDERFULLY done !

Crisp, clean and clearly stated.
(Nice picture ... good to 'see' you)
~*Marge*~



~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com



~Enigma~
Junior Member
since 2000-07-03
Posts 44
St Cloud, MN
6 posted 2000-08-31 03:38 PM


Well said and well done.  Short and too the point.  I like it.
Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
7 posted 2000-08-31 03:42 PM



  This is a wonderfully written poem, that packs a powerful message!!
           Very nice writing.....


Today is a gift....
That is why they call it
'the Present'!



mariee66
Senior Member
since 2000-01-30
Posts 596
Recess, OfYourMind
8 posted 2000-08-31 07:35 PM


Thank you all for reading and leaving such gracious replies.  I'm happy that I was able to convey my message...was worried that some might not get it  
Thanks again,
Marie~

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