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Open Poetry #9
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X Angel
Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521
Oregon

0 posted 2000-08-19 03:33 PM


in his mind's eye he could see her
as his memory and desires played Prospero
with his longing heart

she, the ballerina of the sun
hands raised heavenward
beseeching the sky
her voice jubilant in her abandon
as she turned a pirouette
in her sylvan dance
upon a stage of verdant clover fields

while the sun played a game of hide and seek
with the threatening rain
it's gentle fingers, the stage lights
glowing through her gossamer-like dress
etching the curve of her breast
and the flare of her hip
into his very soul

and as the heavens liberated the summer rain
her face upturned to the sky
with eyes closed
while droplets of rain caressed her torrid skin
in ardent dewy kisses

she beckoned to him to join her
luring him with her sylphan smile
to a concurrent destiny
in aestival choreography
upon a verdant dance floor
in fragrant fields of clover


[This message has been edited by X Angel (edited 08-19-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Heather Walters - All Rights Reserved
ladysixstring
Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 374

1 posted 2000-08-19 03:36 PM


Toe tingling wonderful... "while the sun played a game of hide and seek with the threatening rain it's gentle fingers, the stage lights glowing through her gossamer-like dress etching the curve of her breast
and the flare of her hip  into his very soul" being absolutely Fantastic!!!

-jaimie
www.ladysixstring.com



Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
2 posted 2000-08-19 03:45 PM


This is incredibly lovely! Like reading lace made of words...your images are superb! I really could see this lovely creature dancing on the page!  
LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
3 posted 2000-08-20 09:12 AM


Oh, man, Heather!  This is great!  But, I didn't know that women realize what sunlight shing though a dress does to a man's insides - turns us to jelly, and melts us every time we open that memory and take another look.  This is a great poem, Hether!  I can see the dance, and feel the emotions it brings to me.
doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
4 posted 2000-08-20 10:29 AM


"etching the curve of her breast
and the flare of her hip
into his very soul"

this is so very very beautiful, heather... it's an awesome read... great writing!  

Alicat
Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094
Coastal Texas
5 posted 2000-08-20 10:46 AM


Heather, I don't know where you pull some of your inspiration.  P'raps it's best that you keep it a secret, so you can draw more upon it to create such exquisite verse like this one.  Smooth, flowing, and slightly erotic, these dancers dance wherever rain falls.
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
6 posted 2000-08-20 10:51 AM


I have to agree with the above comments... this is a wonderful flowing example of beauty in verse...very well done!!
X Angel
Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521
Oregon
7 posted 2000-08-20 10:25 PM


I loved writing this, in part because I had to take a viewpoint other than my own...so it was a struggle, and I had to work hard to get the feeling right. (my poor thesaurus, it's pages were smokin'!!)
Thanks so much guys, your comments showed me that it was worth the effort  
~Heather

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
8 posted 2000-08-21 05:29 PM


Hm... sounds good to me... a concurrent destiny.... This makes me think of the mermaid.... but she's doing a sylvan dance this time..
brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
9 posted 2000-08-21 06:35 PM


Wow x angel this is breath taking, beautiful very beautiful.



"Beyond all this good is the terror,The grip of a mercenary hand,When savagery turns all good reason, There's no turning back, no last stand,"I.Curtis

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