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Open Poetry #9
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bobbi
New Member
since 2000-08-17
Posts 9
USA

0 posted 2000-08-17 05:12 PM



I'm still thinking of you
The look in your eyes
The smile on your face
I want them to myself
I want to float across the world
To where you are
Just to watch you
Watch you drink a beer
Share a smile
And have a smoke
I don't want to hurt you
I just want to be near you
And let these feelings explode

© Copyright 2000 bobby collins - All Rights Reserved
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
1 posted 2000-08-17 05:14 PM


Hi Bobbi welcome to Passions...hooked on loving this one person..well you described it very well...good job!
ladysixstring
Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 374

2 posted 2000-08-17 05:45 PM


Very "real life".  I enjoyed this.

-jaimie
http://www.ladysixstring.com

bobbi
New Member
since 2000-08-17
Posts 9
USA
3 posted 2000-08-17 05:53 PM


Thanks to you both...
I wouldn't really call it hooked on loving her, but hooked on her yes. Its always the ones you can't have i think.

ggrn3
Member
since 2000-08-17
Posts 433
Nahunta Georgia U.S.
4 posted 2000-08-17 05:56 PM


Person described in this poem makes me picture a US Navel person.  Don't ask me why, I guess it's the imagery of "floating across the world, drinking a beer, sharing a smile and a smoke."  This poem seemed very real to me.  Very good.

Garfield

sarahC
Member
since 2000-06-07
Posts 84
Michigan
5 posted 2000-08-17 09:16 PM


The world is a very small place...to float to her would be a small price to pay....I loved the poem....and believe me the feelings seem to already be exploding in your writing.....
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