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Open Poetry #9
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T McCoy
Member
since 2000-07-24
Posts 186


0 posted 2000-08-08 03:20 PM





i chain smoke cigarettes
while i pace around this tomb
i think i'll set my bed on fire
i don't wanna sleep alone
anymore
i've gone through all the channels
of course there's nothin' on
i turn up the radio
seems they only play our songs
anymore
only me to keep me company
and i know everything i have to say
man i've heard it all before
it's always all the same

      and as i pace around
      i realize i've changed
      since you've been gone
      i'm just not the same
      i never did understand
      how i became your friend
      or how i became your man
      before you went away
      and i'm afraid i've changed
      i am not the same
      would you still fall in love
      with the man i am today?

if you were here what would you say?
that i'm losin' weight and fading away?
i need to eat some more
well i'm livin' off of caffiene
tonight i'm goin' back to Nashville
to relive another daydream
we'll exchange vows in that motel
where river phoenix filmed this thing called love
our honeymoon of roadtrips
you'll start feeling homesick
to sit atop the sand dunes
and listen to the waves break
yea man i know all about homesick too

     and as i drift away
     laying on the couch
     i realize i've changed
     i'm just not the same
     i'd love to understand
     how i became your friend
     how i became your man
     so i could take you by your hand
     and do those things again
     cause i'm afraid i've changed
     i know i'm not the same
     i wonder if you'd even fall in love
     with the man i am today...


© Copyright 2000 a m mccoy - All Rights Reserved
Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
1 posted 2000-08-08 03:30 PM


T McCoy...
           This should be put to melody!!
        I can almost hear it in a song, and
        I really like what I hear....
              
         "I think I'll set my bed on fire,
              I don't want to sleep
                      alone..."

             That is great writing!!


I have but one goal in
life.........
To make you smile!
~~ Sunny ~~


JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
2 posted 2000-08-08 03:37 PM


Very intense reflections on being alone...I've felt these same feelings before..even lost about 25 pounds when a certain woman left me...my stomach was in knots....I couldn't eat..I didn't want to eat..I'm better now...many years later...a testimony that you get over it...but I understand how miserable it is to live through this..its funny cause I changed to and at one point she told me she liked the old James.
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

3 posted 2000-08-08 04:09 PM


aw...this is sad...and and maybe you should go back to nashville with this beauty instead...just a thought, m'friend...very well done!
rosepetals25
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Elite
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076
PA
4 posted 2000-08-08 04:43 PM


Tony,

     I was wondering where you got to.. I have seen anything posted for a few days.    Very powerful emotions I see here..and very good writing.  (I like the reference to This Thing Called Love...hehe.. I love that movie)I'm guessing this is a song.. I can almost hear the music playing in my mind when I read it. Well done, I can't wait to read more

                          Rosepetals

Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

5 posted 2000-08-08 04:44 PM


So often we are changed by the beginnings and endings of things...relationships cast us into their own special mold as they progress, and upon their ending, that secure shape is taken away, and we once again become mutable, changing beings. Your poem sings perfectly of this. Very nice.

~ Claire

Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau


Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
6 posted 2000-08-08 05:06 PM


Tony*

This was powerful...you brought tears to my eyes...darn you  .....being alone at the moment and the events leading up to that point can't help but change you....you had to so that you would survive...I'll bet she's changed too and is worried about the same things...but of all the things that change one thing doesn't change...love.  Great writing....."I melting"...

T McCoy
Member
since 2000-07-24
Posts 186

7 posted 2000-08-08 05:15 PM


Sunny1*  thank you so much for your kind reply...
believe me...they're all songs    

James*  i've only lost 12 lbs. but i should've put on about 10 by now...yea...just don't wanna eat myself....
thanks...  

serenity*  i sure don't mean to write sad...
it's just that muse i guess  
thank you!

rosepetals*  you're guessing right...
glad you liked it and caught the reference...
that really is where we exchanged our vows...
thank you    

Claire*  so right you are...i'm learning a little more about who i am without her everyday...

and to all out there i guess i should just clarify...my wife and i are still together...
but she's in Florida and i'm in Canada...
i've got to get my green card before the NIS catches me...so i'm just waiting now...
i didn't realize i'd become so codependant though...but i guess that's the way it goes when you marry your best friend, huh?

again a sincere thanks to all...  

Tony



[This message has been edited by T McCoy (edited 08-08-2000).]

T McCoy
Member
since 2000-07-24
Posts 186

8 posted 2000-08-08 05:24 PM


bdc*  how is it that you always know what to say to make me smile?    
you've brightened my day........again!
thank you so much!

Tony


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

9 posted 2000-08-08 06:34 PM


i chain smoke cigarettes
while i pace around this tomb
i think i'll set my bed on fire
i don't wanna sleep alone
anymore
===================

      and as i pace around
      i realize i've changed
      since you've been gone
      i'm just not the same
      i never did understand
      how i became your friend
      or how i became your man
      before you went away
      and i'm afraid i've changed
      i am not the same
      would you still fall in love
      with the man i am today?

===================
     and as i drift away
     laying on the couch
     i realize i've changed
     i'm just not the same
     i'd love to understand
     how i became your friend
     how i became your man
     so i could take you by your hand
     and do those things again
     cause i'm afraid i've changed
     i know i'm not the same
     i wonder if you'd even fall in love
     with the man i am today...
======================
how could she not??????
man this is awesome...
i love the depth of your emotion in your work...
shes under your skin and she inspires
great things in you..
and that is VERY COOL..
later-grand-ole-opry-gator LOL
jm


There are places inside our souls -
that have never been touched.
There are places inside our hearts -
that need to be loved this much.
~jm~


Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
10 posted 2000-08-08 06:54 PM


Tony...well the US needs more like you Friend...do you need a sponsor guy? This is such a sad sad song.
Rex Allen McCoy
Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863
Sippin a Timmy's in London
11 posted 2000-08-09 01:06 AM



She must love you a lot to take the time to send this little Gem

Cheer up
you'll get there healthier

Jenn E
Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 589
Kelowna, BC, Canada
12 posted 2000-08-09 02:25 AM


Everything I read from you, I hear music. I love how you have shared yourself like this, that is statement in itself. As I read I could feel your lonliness and all that you are feeling and my heart goes out to yours. Our hearts have to feel what they feel, but know, through all the pain they will heal, somehow. Know that you are worthy of the hapiness that is looking for you right now.
Soft Smiles to you
Jenn E

Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
13 posted 2000-08-09 08:24 AM


AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWE    He's an angel......your son of course   Exactly Rex!!!  
vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
14 posted 2000-08-09 10:44 AM


Enjoyed this read!!!!!!
JnR4eva
Member
since 2000-08-07
Posts 377
Bronx, NY
15 posted 2000-08-09 01:08 PM


What a touching poem, so full of emotion, so full of pain.  i hope things turn out for the better... great job with this work of art  .
Alle'cram
Senior Member
since 2000-02-28
Posts 1816
Texas
16 posted 2000-08-09 01:20 PM


Awesome! I love this. A love poem from your heart and the reader surely picks this message up. Wow, this will blow her away, (or maybe back).    marcy
T McCoy
Member
since 2000-07-24
Posts 186

17 posted 2000-08-09 07:28 PM


jm*  THANK YOU!!! it's great hear that you think so....

Paula*  thank you...hope there's still room...my sled is packed and the dogs are ready...

Dad*  hmmm...what to say to that...THANKS.
      ya made my day in a million ways...i know she loves me...i just miss her too much
hope ya don't think i'm sad all day cause i'm really not...it's just the alone time...
but just seeing connor's face...i'm going keep bumping this to the top just to show him off...and hey damn it i'm 28 years old...daddy's not supposed to be able to make me cry anymore..!  lol
thank you more than i could ever say


Jenn*  i'm glad to know you're hearing music...thank you for the very kind reply...


bdc...you're too nice  

vandana*  glad to hear it  

JnR4eva*  thanks for the kind words

marcy*  thank you...much appreciated

again thanks to all...your replies are as much my inspiration as anything else...
well...almost  

Tony

Rex Allen McCoy
Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863
Sippin a Timmy's in London
18 posted 2000-08-10 12:01 PM


}>{{{{o>

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
19 posted 2000-08-10 12:15 PM


Hey Tony ..great stuff.. love the flow and the reflection on the desperation of lonliness pouring from a torn heart. I know that kind of lonliness and it sure is different from just being lonely because one is alone. And you're right, the intensity of the hurt changes the person to the extent that they don't even know themself.
Great work! looking for more man keep it up!

Jeffrey Carter
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367
State of constant confusion!
20 posted 2000-08-10 02:47 AM


I'm bumping this back up so you can show him off some more

I know exactly how you feel when it comes to your son.....My wife and I are seperated at the moment and I haven't seen my kids in more than three weeks now....So believe me when I say I share your pain.

Take care of yourself M'friend

Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
21 posted 2000-08-10 03:05 AM


This is such a sad poem but I know and feel your loss within yourself....Lonliness itself takes on many shades and this is one of the darkest....Love the read, you have shared it well and as for the little guy.......way too cute....gonna grow up loving his dad and breaking hearts.
bad little dog
Junior Member
since 2000-07-08
Posts 38
city pound
22 posted 2000-08-10 08:47 AM


... Ruff ...


Ruff Bow Wow
Grrrrrrrrrrr

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
23 posted 2000-08-10 09:16 AM


Very powerful and intriguing words  
T McCoy
Member
since 2000-07-24
Posts 186

24 posted 2000-08-10 07:20 PM


ethome*  thanks brother...you're right!  
  so it goes though, eh!  

Jeffrey*  geez thanks man...I appreciate it...   Sorry to hear that we have that in common...

Mark*  thank you much for your thoughts...
   yea he pretty cute eh!  thanks guy!  

hoot*  thanks much  

bld* thanks  

thanks again to all       

BloomingRose
Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092
Florida
25 posted 2000-08-10 08:19 PM


To be loved that much... *sigh*
What an awesome person you are to be able to express yourself to that degree.
I hear a song somewhere.

Deb
BloomingRose

Tennessee Angel
Senior Member
since 2000-06-03
Posts 661
Tennessee
26 posted 2000-08-10 09:01 PM


Oh, this is simply beautiful!!!  
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
27 posted 2000-08-10 10:17 PM


Being alone too long makes people crazy.

You penned these expressions well, giving us a glimpse into you.

Nice eyes, too.

Corinne

T McCoy
Member
since 2000-07-24
Posts 186

28 posted 2000-08-11 01:32 PM


Bloomingrose*  thank you so much...

Tennessee*  thanks for the reply...

Corrine*   yea it does and thank you and thank you  

Tony  

JulieAnn
Senior Member
since 2000-06-12
Posts 754
Earth 3rd Rock from the sun!!
29 posted 2000-08-16 04:34 AM


Tony~~~~I am not sure how I could have missed this one...must have been all of that working I have been doing how dare I !! LOL You have poured your heart out in this one......and yes no matter how old we get our parents will always be able to make us cry.....and I agree he is a gem....very good writing..brought a tear to my eye....glad I searched for it....   < !signature-->

Julie  




[This message has been edited by JulieAnn (edited 08-16-2000).]

T McCoy
Member
since 2000-07-24
Posts 186

30 posted 2000-08-16 04:59 AM


you don't know how ya missed it?  i don't know how ya found it...i think it's been in limbo...my son...yea he is eh?  thank you twice, i guess!

Tony  

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
31 posted 2000-08-21 06:59 PM


yep, definate song here...I loved this one!
ggrn3
Member
since 2000-08-17
Posts 433
Nahunta Georgia U.S.
32 posted 2000-08-21 10:51 PM


T.McCoy,
  I can feel your loneliness in this one.  Althouth I don't smoke, I have done much of the pacing and wandering in my time.  How lonely can one be left to his own thoughts, pondering mistakes made in a relationship.  My answer; "mighty lonely"

Garfield

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