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Open Poetry #9
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David D
Junior Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 19


0 posted 2000-08-07 06:36 AM


I know that someday things as I know it will come to end.  I don't wont to ever lose my best friend.  4 you Neacy.

David

UNTITLED

I wonder when there will come a time of day,
when you forget about me and time slips away.
Moving on to other things in your life,
dealing with daily chores and the strife.
You hold another and forget about the past,
this is something I know may not last.
You are held by another and all I can do,
is live another life and think of you.
I wish I would have been the one you cared for so much,
holding me, kissing me, wanting to be the only one you touch.
There are three words I want to say,
but that is something for another day.
You are my greatest friend,
I will love until the very end.

© Copyright 2000 David D - All Rights Reserved
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
1 posted 2000-08-07 06:49 AM


I like the thoughts....I suggest "For You" or  "For My Friend" or "Wish It Was Me"...Take care and have hope...  James
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
2 posted 2000-08-07 06:51 AM


David,
this is a very touching poem...

for a title... maybe "I will remain in love" could work out, but James has excellent suggestions as well...

regards,
sudhir

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
3 posted 2000-08-07 10:14 AM


maybe...In a Different Future?

never say never

MMoonchild
Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715
PA
4 posted 2000-08-07 10:25 AM


I was touched by the Time Slips Away
David...
~~soft smiles
Maureen

rosepetals25
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Elite
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076
PA
5 posted 2000-08-07 10:59 AM


David,

    A very heart felt poem   I like it.  As for titles.. I am bad at that..lol.  But i like Maureen's title  

                  rosepetals

ddgoose
Member
since 2000-07-25
Posts 250
Baltimore, MD, USA
6 posted 2000-08-07 08:48 PM


David

I like your poem.  I could feel your sadness coming through.   As far as a title, maybe "lost love", Until we meet again, I'll remember you.  

Keep up the good work!

Euclid the Kid
Member
since 2000-07-15
Posts 51
Eugene,Oregon
7 posted 2000-08-07 10:20 PM


Your poem hits the heart, David.  I feel ya'.  How about calling it- "I'm Ready for our Chapter Two"? that seems to fit.
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