navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #9 » Nameless Nothings
Open Poetry #9
Post A Reply Post New Topic Nameless Nothings Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Salooma
Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781


0 posted 2000-08-07 01:29 AM


Hey...kinda a new poster in open...would like any suggestions u got....thank you!

Nameless Nothings

Fluttery days of endless rumor,
Upon darkened stars ablaze in fire.
Mornings of infinite, drowning chatter,
With gloomy nights of similar fate.
Lively hearts wildly unleashed,
And clouds of darkness fill me.
Fearless cries escape the tongue,
And splutter into nameless nothings.
The longest day withdraws in worry,
Only to the comfort of the night.
Daybreak awakes the hurt once more,
Another unpromising day begins.

[This message has been edited by Ron (06-25-2011 10:10 AM).]

© Copyright 2000 Salooma - All Rights Reserved
Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
1 posted 2000-08-07 01:38 AM


Salooma...
          It doesn't look like you'll be
        needing much help!! This was a
        great poem with lots of images to
        think about...
                  Nice Job!!!


I have but one goal in
life.........
To make you smile!
~~ Sunny ~~


Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
2 posted 2000-08-07 02:51 PM


Salooma,
This is winderful poetry....
----
The longest day withdraws in worry,
Only to the comfort of the night.
Daybreak awakes the hurt once more,
Another unpromising day begins.
----

great images within some excellent lines...
enjoyed thoroughly...

regards,
sudhir

RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
3 posted 2000-08-07 06:37 PM


Hi Salooma,

I really liked this....really.

By your asking for suggestions, I feel you think this needs something. Am I right???

It does needs something, but at this moment I cannot put my finger on it. I will read and re-read until I find it.

I am glad you posted it.


Robert

if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming.



Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #9 » Nameless Nothings

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary