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Adrift
| Open Poetry #6 |
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Adrift |
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Destiny Junior Member
since 2000-03-25
Posts 47 |
adrift on the river listening to the water rhythmically caress our boat while the soft sounds of the city serenade us from the shore i hear my heart pound the lighthouse shrinks as the island slowly fades from my sight i see your face summer breezes tousle my hair and the vessel rocks gently i feel your hand in mine hints of red wine linger on my breath i taste your lips my eyes close, attempting to hold on to this moment to spend a lifetime inside of this fantasy and my soul sighs fulfilled by your presence awestruck by what can only be called completion i know your heart |
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| © Copyright 2000 Destiny - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Songbird Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184Missouri |
Simply beautiful, and I like the way you formated it, lends to the the mood of of being adrift. Very well written, hope to see more of your poetry.. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
destiny this is exquisite..so serene and sensual and calming...very nice...perfect presentation as well. very enjoyable read... we live souly to know this "completion" great work take care, jm The stars shine so bright, now's the time I close my eyes - soft wind touch my face, Cool sand upon the place where I once kissed you And held you close. Now I will reach for the stars... Because Oh my love, that's where you are... Though the storms of black night rage on I still see your face I still feel your lips on mine And though my heart feels all alone without you I still hear you sing to me I still hear your voice on the sea... vertical horizon |
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Rosemary J. Gwaltney Senior Member
since 1999-08-26
Posts 997northern mountains, Idaho |
This is exquisitely written with a beautiful presentation. Made me feel as though I were there with my love. |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Destiny~ Such a lovely poem presented with beauty. I sure enjoyed this trip as seen through your eyes. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
Destiny, you have captured the feeling of being on that boat wonderfully. . . Now, if I can just find those oars!  LOLWonderful poem, my friend. . .I really like it -------------------------------------------------------- That which gives light must endure burning --Victor Frankl |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Incredible! I could 'feel' this poem!! |
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Destiny Junior Member
since 2000-03-25
Posts 47 |
"and now if you'll look to your left you'll see...." thanks for taking this trip with me! (even though it was originally intended for two  and sven? if you've lost our oars does that mean we're stranded on the water? (oh darn!) Destiny |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
I guess it does Destiny. . . should we swim for it, or hope that the tide takes us in? ------------------------------------------------------< !signature--> That which gives light must endure burning --Victor Frankl [This message has been edited by Sven (edited 04-10-2000).] |
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Jeffrey Carter
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
beautifully crafted oh, the taste of the sweet salt air Jeffrey |
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poetFemmeFatale Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646Arkansas |
Oh geesh...I *sighed* so hard after reading this, I darn near fell out of the boat! LOL I remember how it feels to be in love like that...it's been a LONG time, but thanks for reminding me anyways....SIGH....I've had a few moments like that, where you just want time to stop, so you can freeze the moment. Beautiful Destiny...breathtaking work, and memories! |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
Adrift with the man you love, nothing finer? Hope you get to make many tales and memories together Destiny. Beautiful picture you painted hon.. A heart and soul are not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others... ~Isis~ (Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit) |
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Passions Voice Member
since 2000-10-23
Posts 291Michigan |
I guess I did find more from you. This is really wonderful. I have one question: Did you ever find the oars?? passion is life. . . ~Diana |
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