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Open Poetry #6
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Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA

0 posted 2000-04-05 12:26 PM


My mind wanders to last night
It felt so right
Your body next to mine
Felt way more than fine
I wish I could make it last
Recreate a piece of the past
But life doesn't work that way
I will wait for another day

What I wouldn't give
For another chance to live
Our bodies together as one
In the heat of the sun
Feeling the intense rays
Throughout all my days
Beating on my skin
I know I can win

All I have to do is try
No need to be so shy
Our bodies on the sand
Travel through time to a distant land
Where time and space subside
With me at your side
Day after day
It could be this way


------------------------------------------------------


 Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end.
--Michael W. Smith

© Copyright 2000 Jennifer L. Garcia - All Rights Reserved
Danny Holloway
Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034
Tulsa, OK
1 posted 2000-04-05 10:53 AM


Nice poem Lone Wolf.  Good work with the rhyme and it just flows down the screen with sensitivity of feeling.
Actually, I see no reason why this could not be posted in Open #6.  You would probably get many more responses.  It does not have strong Adult content.
Anyway, thought you did a nice job with this
piece.


 A life isn't significant except for its impact on other lives.

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
2 posted 2000-04-05 08:58 PM


Very true..I moved this to Open..it's not that 'adult' that we can't all enjoy it....  
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
3 posted 2000-04-05 09:11 PM


So glad you moved it. It's wonderful.
A very lovely and romantic piece.
Liz

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
4 posted 2000-04-05 10:50 PM


I have to agree with Liz on this one. . . quite good LW. . .you seem to have a gift for this . . .

Excellent!

------------------------------------------------------------< !signature-->

 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl



[This message has been edited by Sven (edited 04-05-2000).]

SorrowsMystress
Member
since 2000-04-01
Posts 178
I'm a wanderer, a nomad...I don't live in one particular area, Just wherever I end up.
5 posted 2000-04-05 10:55 PM


I must agree with everyone else on this one. I loved it, it brought back a lot of feelings of my boyfriend and I (we haven't broken up, but we've come close). So I can totally relate to this poem. Absolutely honest and beautiful!  

 "It was my love that did us both to death. " -Sylvia Plath

Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
6 posted 2000-04-05 11:55 PM


LoneWolf** The true expression of what making love is all about.  You used style and grace and made it flow from your soul...nothing could be more beautiful.

 Hold me for yesterday
Kiss me for tomorrow
But love me for today.


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

7 posted 2000-04-06 09:01 AM


*sigh*...very nice LW...perfect poem of longing, and love...very nice.
take care, jm

 The stars shine so bright, now's the time
I close my eyes - soft wind touch my face,
Cool sand upon the place where I once kissed you
And held you close.
Now I will reach for the stars...
Because Oh my love, that's where you are...
Though the storms of black night rage on
I still see your face
I still feel your lips on mine
And though my heart feels all alone without you
I still hear you sing to me
I still hear your voice on the sea...
vertical horizon


Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
8 posted 2000-04-06 09:17 AM


-Mr. Wolf (hehe)

Wow!   This was great! I really liked the flow of the whole poem...was like butter. Full of rich powerful emotion...perfect love poem!

Take care,
AMY  

 ~Live today as though it were your last but prepare for tomorrow as though it were here~

Danny Holloway
Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034
Tulsa, OK
9 posted 2000-04-06 12:38 PM


See, i was right about this poem.  Fits perfectly here.  Glad it was moved.
And for fun, i'm going to 'bump' it back to the top so ALL those other poetry fans get a chance to read it.
Lone Wolf, your not alone anymore!

Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
10 posted 2000-04-06 10:25 PM


Poet deVine....thank you for moving here for me....I appreciate that!!  I was a little unsure of putting it here to begin with.  

Liz....thanks....glad you liked it.

Sven....you know I've had this gift....just didn't always hear the muse whispering in my ear....got it now!!!  Thank you for the lovely comment.

SorrowsMystress....Sorry you could relate so well and I am there right now.  Very true, my feelings out there to the world.

butterflies....thank you for the wonderful comments to my work.  It is very nice to be appreciated in such a way.  All my words originate in my heart and soul....don't know any other way!!  

Janet....exactly how I feel.  Thank you very much!!

Amy....butter??  Okay, I'll go with that.  Nice image!!!  Happy to please!!

Danny....thank you for the kind words and suggestion to move it.  You made all this possible, my friend.  Very nice of you to bump me up....I owe you!!!  It's nice not to be alone anymore!!  


 Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end.
--Michael W. Smith

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