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Passions in Poetry

Maybelline Eyes

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Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 12-26-1999
Posts 5512
Ontario, CANADA


0 posted 04-01-2000 10:34 PM       View Profile for Honeybee   Email Honeybee   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Honeybee


I was recently reading poetry in the main section before the forums and came across a poem entitled Maybelline Eyes and expected to read something that went into depth of how women struggle to stay or become beautiful to please society.  It was still a good poem, but I was left dissapointed and so I used the same title and created my own poem on how I felt about this topic, please let me know if it is good enough.


MAYBELLINE EYES

Maybelline eyes, and Cover Girl lips,
blushed sunken cheekbones and barely-there hips,
french manicured fingernails with painted red toes,
Coco Chanel perfume on your wrists, wearing Gucci clothes,

Colgate whitened sparkling teeth and Clairol blonde hair from a box,
Revlon lashes, curled and coated and Pantene hairsprayed locks,
tinted Max Factor moisturizer, Yves Saint Laurent concealor too,
longing to be like a supermodel,
selling your soul to be anybody but you

The latest eyeshadow colour with smokey grey eyeliner for the eyes,
and yet, the girl that stares back from the mirror is not your friend,
for, Elizabeth Arden skin is but a thin disguise;
still, you wear your mask to the world day in and day out,
creating full, soft, pouty lips just like Claudia Schiffer's,
molding a perfect face like Cindy Crawford's,
and starving yourself for a manequin body to be like Christy Turlington too,
you've become quite the illusionist, I must say,
but not a good enough magician to conceal the emptiness in you.

By Melissa Honeybee
© Copyright 2000 Melissa P. Long-Monette - All Rights Reserved
Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 06-16-99
Posts 3968
In the space between moments


1 posted 04-01-2000 10:46 PM       View Profile for Alwye   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alwye

You've definitely said a lot here, Melissa.  So many people try to cover up on the outside, trying to make up for all they lack on the inside.  Exellent and uniquely done.  

 *Krista Knutson*

As soon as man does not take his existence for granted, but beholds it as something unfathomably mysterious, thought begins.
~*Albert Schweitzer*~
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


2 posted 04-02-2000 12:24 AM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Melissa~
Very nicely done.
There are some who would try to
emulate all the 'glamour' they see
in others.

I'm sure it doesn't apply
to everyone and we women all
know that we can 'cover-up'
the outside .. but it's what's
inside that counts !
And there ... we've got SOUL !

* Thought maybe you'd enjoy my
take on 'Brand Names Of Love'
that I posted in Open #3.
I was a 2-day 'newbie' to Passion's
when I posted it.  
http://piptalk.com/pip/Forum20/HTML/001995.html
~*Marge*~



 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


3 posted 04-02-2000 12:36 AM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Melissa, this is very well constructed and expressed. I like it very much.

Like my grandpa used to say....you can paint the barn but there aren't any cows inside, you ain't getting much milk (or something like that)  
tracie66
Member Elite
since 01-18-2000
Posts 4587
Victoria, Australia


4 posted 04-02-2000 06:45 AM       View Profile for tracie66   Email tracie66   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit tracie66's Home Page   View IP for tracie66

Excellent imagery, absolutely loved this.
Marge's right it's what's on the inside that counts.  


 Keep all the windows of your mind open
Anne Rooks
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 11-08-1999
Posts 9405
Pennsylvania


5 posted 04-02-2000 07:56 AM       View Profile for Elizabeth Santos   Email Elizabeth Santos   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Elizabeth Santos

Good lesson here and well spoken
Liz
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


6 posted 04-02-2000 09:14 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

I like the fresh face you put on this one  
Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 12-26-1999
Posts 5512
Ontario, CANADA


7 posted 04-02-2000 11:58 AM       View Profile for Honeybee   Email Honeybee   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Honeybee

First, let me say that I am so glad to see so many replies to my poem, I didn't expect hardly any.  

Alwye -thank you for the compliment, I have always loved every single piece by you.  I still say that The Unicorn from passions in Prose is your best work, I love that one!

Marge Tindal - thank you and yes I did read your poem "FASHION STATEMENT OF LOVE,"  I suggest that everyone else read it again too, you say so much more in your poem than I could ever think of.  My favourite lines were "I ride the Polo pony across this town and L'oreal blonde I wear for my crown"

"nothing on these lips
but lasting color of rose
and Maybelline lashes,
for flirting you know"

Balladeer - Wow, I finally got you to read one of my poems and you liked it!  Then my job is done now LOL    Thank you for taking the time out to read and reply, and your Grandpa was wise it's a good quote

Tracie66 and Elizabeth - thank you so much for the compliments, It means a lot

Of course, last but not least, Ruth - I'm so glad that you enjoyed my poem, a compliment from such a talented and unique poet like yourself is always so flattering, I am blushing  

Take care,
Melissa Honeybee
Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 06-07-99
Posts 7296
America the beautiful


8 posted 04-02-2000 12:32 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

Well said, Melissa. Now let's hope that those who need to see it do....

Elizabeth


 "He have his goodness now. God forbid I take it from him!"
-The Crucible

Parker
Member Elite
since 01-06-2000
Posts 3135
... the old black rum


9 posted 04-02-2000 02:11 PM       View Profile for Parker   Email Parker   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Parker's Home Page   View IP for Parker

So what are you saying here, that all those masks I've come to think of as normal are just false. The one true equalizer is that the masks have to come off eventually and the bare soul remains. Then all to often we meet the stranger...... like that old billy joel song.

Great poem .....Melissa


Parker
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


10 posted 04-02-2000 04:22 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Very well done, Melissa! I enjoyed this!

Denise
 
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