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Passions in Poetry

storms of war

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Destiny
Junior Member
since 03-25-2000
Posts 47


0 posted 03-30-2000 05:54 PM       View Profile for Destiny   Email Destiny   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Destiny

the clouds march in
like an army of occupation
stationed in my sky.
they seem to stand guard
making this territory their own
and waiting
for the lightning and thunder
reinforcements to appear...
and when these comrades
close rank around their own,
i hear the signal
from the thunder's cannon
and see the flash
of the lightning's response...
and the troops attack,
taking aim
and opening fire,
raining on my home...
reigning on my home.

© Copyright 2000 Destiny - All Rights Reserved
CherylLynnMckee
Member
since 03-28-2000
Posts 219


1 posted 03-30-2000 06:04 PM       View Profile for CherylLynnMckee   Email CherylLynnMckee   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for CherylLynnMckee

wow..great poem..great comparisons you draw here...well done.

 
Danny Holloway
Member Elite
since 01-15-2000
Posts 2072
Tulsa, OK


2 posted 03-30-2000 06:36 PM       View Profile for Danny Holloway   Email Danny Holloway   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Danny Holloway

Nice imagination you have, and your writing is not bad either.
Nice work.
Marina
Member Elite
since 02-10-2000
Posts 2267
Pickering, Ontario


3 posted 03-30-2000 08:30 PM       View Profile for Marina   Email Marina   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marina

I like this one Destiny...very nice.  Welcome to Passions.

Marina
Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 03-16-2000
Posts 5900
Lansing, MI USA


4 posted 03-30-2000 10:24 PM       View Profile for Lone Wolf   Email Lone Wolf   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lone Wolf

Very nice work, Destiny.  Is the storm a metaphor for the turmoil in real life?  Seems to be.  I love the thunder and lightning images that come to mind.  Great words!!  

------------------------------------------------

 Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end.
--Michael W. Smith
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


5 posted 03-31-2000 12:59 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Interesting take on rain! Good one..
Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 11-23-1999
Posts 15611
Lansing, MI USA


6 posted 03-31-2000 01:00 AM       View Profile for Sven   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sven

Excellent Destiny. . . when the storm comes, we can only prepare for it the best that we can. . .and hope that we can survive it. . .

Wonderful words. . .

-------------------------------------------------------

 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

Marge Tindal
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Member Empyrean
since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


7 posted 03-31-2000 07:41 AM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Destiny~
I really enjoyed the movement of the troops through this piece.
Never thought of the storms in that frame
of mind before ... wonderfully done.
~*Marge*~



 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

 
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