How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Archives
 Open Poetry #6 Archive
 The Magnitude of Her unfolding
 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24
Follow us on Facebook

 This is an Archive. You may post a reply, but new topics are not allowed.

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

The Magnitude of Her unfolding

 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


0 posted 03-24-2000 07:33 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

The Magnitude of her Unfolding

She stayed out late one day in spring
whispering sighs into the fragrant sky
for she was sixteen and dreams danced
down the dusty weed choked path with her.

It was dinner time
and the air had cooled
but her pounding heart and footsteps
blazed in youthful ardor.

She turned and was bathed in twilight’s glow
floating down a street oh it seemed like floating
of houses stained pink and mauve
against the light of sunset.

She could feel the secrets
that touched her from the window’s glow
of mother’s rocking children’s laughter
and those nesting families touched her soul.

She could feel the undertow
pulling her up into a woman
and she couldn’t say why
she cried into the darkening sky.

A girl is a mighty strong thing
she thought and started running
her bright hair dancing back and forth
and her feet echoing fast go fast.

Her breath felt clean
and her colt legs leaped bursting
bursting was her spirit
on that late night in early spring

the night she glimpsed
the magnitude of her unfolding.



[This message has been edited by Martie (edited 03-24-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 Martie Odell-Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


1 posted 03-24-2000 07:42 PM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

Martie, I think every woman who reads this will know and love it, as I do. And every man...well, I believe it will serve very well to keep the mystery stirring just so.  

Oh so wonderful, each and every line, image, pause...just right.

~ Claire
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 10-28-1999
Posts 5247
state of confusion


2 posted 03-24-2000 07:58 PM       View Profile for Corinne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corinne

Martie, you've done it again!

I think this is one of your best, too!
Fabulous poem!

Corinne
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


3 posted 03-24-2000 08:04 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

You've captured it well, Martie! I remember those days!

Denise
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


4 posted 03-24-2000 08:24 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Wow...you have captured it!  I enjoy your work so much, Martie, thank you!
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


5 posted 03-24-2000 08:58 PM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

My God, girl~
You just blew me completely away !
Martie~ .. I was THERE !

'the night she glimpsed
the magnitude of her unfolding.'

Every woman indeed will identify with
this piece.
You just get better and better and better.
Uniquely YOU !
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 07-07-99
Posts 32119
Tamarac Fla


6 posted 03-24-2000 09:07 PM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

Martie,
You caught the images in a net of subtle lines and painted a beautiful picture. *L*
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


7 posted 03-24-2000 09:49 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

AWESOME Wow, this is a fantastic piece of writing. You have caugt the progression in time with vivid images that bring it all home. Very nice writing here  
Mike
Member Elite
since 06-19-99
Posts 2528


8 posted 03-24-2000 11:22 PM       View Profile for Mike   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mike

I found myself feeling as if I am standing outside looking in a window, not fully comprehending, but recognizing the special moments held within.
Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 03-16-2000
Posts 5900
Lansing, MI USA


9 posted 03-24-2000 11:56 PM       View Profile for Lone Wolf   Email Lone Wolf   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lone Wolf

Martie,
Wow!!!  Excellent job!!!  I feel as if it is happening before my eyes....well done!!!  

 Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end.
--Michael W. Smith
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 11-08-1999
Posts 9405
Pennsylvania


10 posted 03-25-2000 12:14 AM       View Profile for Elizabeth Santos   Email Elizabeth Santos   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Elizabeth Santos

Martie,
It doesn't get any better than this
And not only that, you captured a moment in my life
Magnificent poetry
Liz
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


11 posted 03-25-2000 10:44 AM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Claire--your words mean alot to me...I admire your poetry.

Corinne--thanks to you, and your fabulous poetry I enjoy so much.

Denise--Somehow I knew you would

Serenity--and I enjoy yours...I want to be your name

Marge--thanks so much for being such a good friend

Sy--If I caught you in my images, then I was successful.

Ruth--I love that word "awesome"...thank you for saying it

Mike--I know your vision and that you would understand

Lone Wolf--thanks so much for reading and the wow.

Liz--I guess I'm not the only one that felt that way    hugs!
Parker
Member Elite
since 01-06-2000
Posts 3135
... the old black rum


12 posted 03-25-2000 11:40 AM       View Profile for Parker   Email Parker   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Parker's Home Page   View IP for Parker

Martie, Excellant, I really loved the images.

Parker
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 11-16-1999
Posts 31622
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA


13 posted 03-25-2000 03:48 PM       View Profile for JamesMichael   Email JamesMichael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JamesMichael

This is lovely to read.. James
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


14 posted 03-26-2000 08:49 AM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

It is quite a magnanimous unfolding, isn't it?  You've done an exceptional job in capturing that moment through your wonderful imagery, my friend... I really enjoyed this one..
David2
Member
since 03-22-2000
Posts 412


15 posted 03-26-2000 10:00 AM       View Profile for David2   Email David2   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for David2

Martie,
   This was wonderful! I was swept away with the beauty of a young woman's unfolding. Great work!
      David2
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


16 posted 03-26-2000 12:06 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Wow!!! I don't think any woman ever gets so old she doesn't remember... and you've captured that unfolding magnificently!!!
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


17 posted 03-26-2000 08:55 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Parker--so glad the images pleased you

James--Thank you for reading and for your kind words

Nan--yes it is, don't think anything has compared with it since...

David--so glad you were swept way...a good thing I think

suthern--it would seem not, thanks!
Rosemary J. Gwaltney
Senior Member
since 08-26-99
Posts 1064
northern mountains, Idaho


18 posted 03-29-2000 03:49 AM       View Profile for Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Email Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Rosemary J. Gwaltney's Home Page   View IP for Rosemary J. Gwaltney

Oh, Martie, Martie, Martie - the power with which you work your words, just continues to grow.  I too, have known this feeling.  Perhaps every young girl knows the moment.  I would think so.  I am amazed at the constantly increasing beauty of your poetry.   You paint pictures with words like very few.


Pepper
Member Elite
since 08-19-99
Posts 3134
Southern Florida

Official Passions Reader
19 posted 03-29-2000 08:14 AM       View Profile for Pepper   Email Pepper   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Pepper

Martie,
Thank you for reminding me .... and I agree with most ... you keep getting better and better, and that blows me away ; as each and every time I cannot imagine it getting any better!
I love this piece ....

 A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extraordinaire!
Shannon





Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


20 posted 03-29-2000 09:14 AM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Rosemary and Pepper--thank you both for such wonderful comments--Seems like the more I write the easier it becomes to express what I feel.  Hugs!
Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 12-21-1999
Posts 5742
Southern Abstentia


21 posted 03-29-2000 10:18 AM       View Profile for Local Rebel   Email Local Rebel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Local Rebel

I'll have to add this one to my "things that make me go hmmmmmm...."

As I have strived through my life to understand women-- the more I think we are the same and the more I think we are different.  And what a wonderful thing that we are... eh?  the same, yet so different...
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


22 posted 03-30-2000 12:36 AM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Rebel--Yes, the differences are a wonderful thing...thanks for the hmmmmmmm, always a good thing.
RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


23 posted 03-31-2000 07:03 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

This is too good to miss, how I remember those weeds ...I think...age you know..

You have a very unique style Martie....always making me think..

HUSG
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


24 posted 03-31-2000 10:38 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Rainbow---How wonderful to see you...thanks for responding, I've missed you...well, me and a bunch of other people..LOL
Martie will be notified of replies
 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Archives >> Open Poetry #6 >> The Magnitude of Her unfolding Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors