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Passions in Poetry

Shadowland Lady........................#1

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Balladeer
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since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


0 posted 03-23-2000 11:07 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer


She is real - but not really
She belongs - but not quite
Has a man - but then only
At night.

She can feel - but not fully
Dwells rarely on pride
Not alone - but she's lonely
Inside.

She's a shadow land lady;
Lives well - but she lives
On the baubles and crumbs
That a married man gives

And she thinks she is winning
Doesn't know she has lost
Till the day comes to add up
The cost.

She's a cute decoration
A small porcelain doll
And she lives like a taxi -
On call.

She's secure - but unsurely
Has a house - but no home
At his whim, she will wind up
Alone.

She's a shadow land lady
Living only at night
She can stay - if she stays out
Of sight.

And the clock keeps on ticking
Days keep moving along
Soon her youth and her life
Will be gone.

© Copyright 2000 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved
Elizabeth
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Member Rara Avis
since 06-07-99
Posts 7296
America the beautiful


1 posted 03-23-2000 11:28 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

I remember this! And it's just as good~and as sad~as ever.

Elizabeth

 "He have his goodness now. God forbid I take it from him!"
-The Crucible

Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


2 posted 03-23-2000 11:36 PM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

A little different and really neat, Balladeer. Irony, sadness, truth.

~ Claire
JamesMichael
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since 11-16-1999
Posts 31622
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA


3 posted 03-23-2000 11:39 PM       View Profile for JamesMichael   Email JamesMichael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JamesMichael

I love this...what writing poetry is all about.   James
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


4 posted 03-23-2000 11:57 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Balladeer...this is an incredible piece of writing. The flow and format is wonderful   as is the content.
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 11-08-1999
Posts 9405
Pennsylvania


5 posted 03-24-2000 12:15 AM       View Profile for Elizabeth Santos   Email Elizabeth Santos   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Elizabeth Santos

Love that meter!
Great poem, and so true
Liz
Marge Tindal
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since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


6 posted 03-24-2000 12:19 AM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Balladeer~
Absolutely wonderful.
It just rolls.
Lovely read aloud.
Your versatility is astounding.
Love ya'
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


7 posted 03-24-2000 01:00 AM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

She is real - but not really
She belongs - but not quite
Has a man - but then only
At night.

She can feel - but not fully
Dwells rarely on pride
Not alone - but she's lonely
Inside.
-----------------------
those first two stanzas are PERFECTION...
they just grabbed me... and haunt me in a way...awesome... and the line about living on call like a Taxi...brilliant Balladeer, truly creative work in this piece...more, more more
take care, jm


 and you can say baby...
baby can I hold you tonight
maybe if told you the right words...
at the right time,
you'd be mine...
baby can I hold you tonight...
tracy chapman


devina
Member Elite
since 10-28-1999
Posts 3189
Northern Cali


8 posted 03-24-2000 02:27 AM       View Profile for devina   Email devina   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for devina

You sure do know how to make a girl catch her breath Mike....this is exrodinary in rhyme...in meaning...ok- let's just say I loved it!!!

 Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


9 posted 03-24-2000 02:41 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Now you have gone and bummed me out...this is loneliness amplified...
Tess
Member
since 03-22-2000
Posts 291
Australia


10 posted 03-24-2000 02:44 AM       View Profile for Tess   Email Tess   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Tess's Home Page   View IP for Tess

well you have definitely written an excellent poetic description of  and sad and lonely person....sort of makes you feel sorry for her..althought maybe she doesnt realize yet

Great poem  

Tess

 "What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two
bodies."
-Aristotle

Michael
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Member Ascendant
since 08-13-99
Posts 6333
California


11 posted 03-24-2000 02:51 AM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

intriguing piece Balladeer.  Sucked me in with the first line and it just got better.
I think I know this person...

Michael
Nan
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since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


12 posted 03-24-2000 08:15 AM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

Checking my shadow here..... It says "NO married men!!!".....

This is awesome, Deer....
Balladeer
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since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


13 posted 03-24-2000 08:18 AM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Elizabeth....thank you for remembering  

Claire...yes, a little of all three. Thank you.

James...what a wonderful compliment. I thank you, sir.

Ruth...Thank you for your extremely kind words.

Liz...praise from the meter leader is always wonderful to receive  

Marge...You should see me juggle!! Thank you, m'dear.

Janet Marie...what can I say? Comments like yours make writing much more pleasurable. Thank you.

Devina...you sweet person, you! Thank you for catching your breath  

Serenity..Don't be bummed. She dumped him the next day and took a job at McDonalds!!

Tess...Realization cames a little late for many of us. Thank you.

Michael...Yep, and so do I. Thanks, friend.

David2
Member
since 03-22-2000
Posts 412


14 posted 03-24-2000 08:30 AM       View Profile for David2   Email David2   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for David2

This is verywell done, the structure is excellent. The subject matter is provoking. I enjoyed this a great deal.
    David2  
Lost Dreamer
Member Elite
since 06-20-99
Posts 2589
Normal, Illinois


15 posted 03-24-2000 10:03 AM       View Profile for Lost Dreamer   Email Lost Dreamer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lost Dreamer

This poem is awesome, and got me thinking about shadows which inspired me to write a poem myself about shadows. Thanks for the inspiration.  
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 10-28-1999
Posts 5247
state of confusion


16 posted 03-24-2000 11:54 AM       View Profile for Corinne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corinne

Ah, sweet and sad, Balladeer, sweet and sad.

Corinne
Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


17 posted 03-24-2000 07:29 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Ah..one of my favorites! Excellent as usual sir! It's nice to know I can find one of your poems from time to time..not often enough unfortunately!  
Martie
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since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


18 posted 03-24-2000 08:17 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

What a look into a life...seems so sad and desperate and you have lit it so well with you poem... excellent!
Denise
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since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


19 posted 03-24-2000 08:28 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Very sad that some people actually live like this. Seems to be a very empty life. Great writing Balladeer. But I don't expect anything but great writing from you.

Denise
Dr.Moose1
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since 09-05-99
Posts 3505
Bewilderment , USA


20 posted 03-24-2000 08:50 PM       View Profile for Dr.Moose1   Email Dr.Moose1   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dr.Moose1

Words to a song
sad people sing
Balladeer's words
with truth do ring
 
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