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Passions in Poetry

This Night

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INclan
Senior Member
since 07-20-99
Posts 1046
Indiana, USA


0 posted 03-16-2000 12:47 AM       View Profile for INclan   Email INclan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for INclan


Through the falling rain,
a freight train mourns.
Such is my heart,
without you,
this night.
© Copyright 2000 KKunnen - All Rights Reserved
Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 07-17-99
Posts 8273


1 posted 03-16-2000 12:49 AM       View Profile for Severn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Severn

This is just...I can just feel this. From those few words I got such an impression of images...wow, Inclan - thanks.

And hugs for it is a sad one.




 'Writing sharpens life;
life enriches writing'
Sylvia Plath
INclan
Senior Member
since 07-20-99
Posts 1046
Indiana, USA


2 posted 03-16-2000 01:08 AM       View Profile for INclan   Email INclan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for INclan

Thank you, Severn. I am honored by your response.

INclan
Meadowmuse
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since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


3 posted 03-16-2000 01:18 AM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse



This is voluminous beauty in a mere sprinkling of words, INClan. The feeling here is acute and shared so well.
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
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since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


4 posted 03-16-2000 01:18 AM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

INclan~
This is hauntingly lovely.
I could even hear strains of
Hank Williams, Sr. singing
'I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry'
Now that's vivid.
~*Marge*~



 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

INclan
Senior Member
since 07-20-99
Posts 1046
Indiana, USA


5 posted 03-16-2000 08:26 AM       View Profile for INclan   Email INclan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for INclan

Thank you so much, meadowmouse and Marge. A late night inspiration while working away from my family.  I am glad that you enjoyed my work.  Mmmmmmmmm....I hear that distant train again, outside my office window, and it is still raining this morning.

INclan
Joannak
Member
since 03-11-2000
Posts 121
Indiana, USA


6 posted 03-18-2000 02:27 PM       View Profile for Joannak   Email Joannak   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Joannak

INclan, what beautiful thoughts...
as a matter of fact, I think I can hear the
train whistle now...
jk
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 11-08-1999
Posts 9405
Pennsylvania


7 posted 03-18-2000 04:06 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth Santos   Email Elizabeth Santos   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Elizabeth Santos

The best things come in small packages. This is among the best
Liz
poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite
since 07-25-99
Posts 2961
Arkansas


8 posted 03-18-2000 05:34 PM       View Profile for poetFemmeFatale   Email poetFemmeFatale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for poetFemmeFatale

I can feel this too....wow.  I've heard trains off in the distance "mourning"...it also gives me a sad yearning feeling too.  You captured this well.     Alot of emotion packed in this short epic!
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


9 posted 03-18-2000 09:13 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

These few words say so much. Well done!

Denise
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


10 posted 03-18-2000 09:17 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Sad, but beautiful INclan...I could really relate to this as I live sort of near (but not TOO near the tracks...)  I like 'em short, by the way, as long as it says it all,
which this did.
Balladeer
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since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


11 posted 03-18-2000 09:30 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

There can be few sadder sounds than a train whistle on a lonely night, fading into the distance....leaving.

Excellent words.
Ravenlearns2fly
Member
since 02-28-2000
Posts 71


12 posted 03-18-2000 11:30 PM       View Profile for Ravenlearns2fly   Email Ravenlearns2fly   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Ravenlearns2fly

oooo!!! very nice in deed.
Raven

 
INclan
Senior Member
since 07-20-99
Posts 1046
Indiana, USA


13 posted 03-19-2000 02:59 PM       View Profile for INclan   Email INclan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for INclan

Thank you ALL for your kind words and encouragement.

INclan
 
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