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Open Poetry #6
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PoeticKnight
Senior Member
since 2000-01-20
Posts 1144
New Orleans, LA

0 posted 2000-03-14 01:29 PM


Along shores of windswept time
Far away from my conscious mind
Lies a place of virgin grace
Where water sparkles a vintage wine

There I am to cleanse my soul
Torn apart by this growing hole
Its light devoured by night
Heeding not the thing it stole

Time is short and fading fast
Descending from now unto the past
And in this place of virgin grace
I wish that time could last

Unto this place I speed along
Seeing all, and what went wrong
Taking bits of me from reality,
Until I am totally gone



© Copyright 2000 J.M. Landry - All Rights Reserved
Nate Dogg
Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton
1 posted 2000-03-14 02:06 PM


This is a very good piece! It definitely swept me away!

 Nathan

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

2 posted 2000-03-14 03:38 PM


Great poem, I liked the rhyme scheme as well!

Denise

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

3 posted 2000-03-14 03:45 PM


There I am to cleanse my soul
Torn apart by this growing hole
Its light devoured by night
Heeding not the thing it stole
---------------
Unto this place I speed along
Seeing all, and what went wrong
Taking bits of me from reality,
Until I am totally gone

wow i love this poem...the flow of it catches you and runs with you...and the emotion of it speaks volumes to me...
stalking you until your gone
your jm

 Now for me some words come easy
But I know that they don't mean that much
Compared with the things that are said when lovers touch
You never knew what I loved in you
I don't know what you loved in me
Maybe the picture of somebody you were hoping I might be
jackson browne



serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

4 posted 2000-03-14 08:13 PM


This is just beautiful...wistful and expressive...Nice work, dawlin'.
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