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Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

0 posted 2000-03-13 06:48 PM

And Love Trickles

And so..
It's just another
  day without you
     no time together
          no chance

Blinded  by love
   it will never be
      the same
        Why...
did you stay
away?

Strong suspicion
   shoots across
      my mind, like
         metal balls of
a pinball game.

Striking
  tender nerves,
    breaking into
       sharp fragments
across my heart.

Slashed obliquely
   and love
      trickles and
             flows
away

into nonexistence

Dark Angel
2000

< !signature-->

What comes from the heart goes to the heart.
Samuel Coleridge

[This message has been edited by Dark Angel (edited 03-14-2000).]

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

1 posted 2000-03-13 07:29 PM

This poem was written with the pain you feel--

...Strong suspicion
   shoots across
      my mind, like
         metal balls of
a pinball game....

suspicion is just like that, I think.  Good job.

Denise

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-08-22

Posts 22648

2 posted 2000-03-13 07:59 PM

Excellent writing, Dark Angel. The pain is palpable. Well done.

Denise

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

3 posted 2000-03-13 08:19 PM

So sad! Yet beautifully written..the words and the form....

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

4 posted 2000-03-13 08:25 PM

DarkAngel~
How do you manage to find such beauty in the pain? This is exquisitely presented.
*HUGS*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Severn
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-07-17

Posts 7704

5 posted 2000-03-13 08:50 PM

Oh Maree!!!

This is..stunning!
I am so proud of you...and the content is just heart wrenching hon.

This:

Strong suspicion
                  shoots across
                     my mind, like
                        metal balls of
               a pinball game.

and this:

Slashed obliquely
                  and love
                     trickles and
                            flows
               Away

               Into non existence

are excellent - and that last line truly gets you in the guts.

BIG HUGS!!

Yay....

'Writing sharpens life;
life enriches writing'
Sylvia Plath

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

6 posted 2000-03-14 03:28 PM

I loved this..."striking tender nerves, breaking into sharp fragments across my heart." James

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

7 posted 2000-03-14 08:54 PM

Maree. . .

Everything that I read from you shows your heart. . . this is no exception. . . beautiful words my friend. . .

-------------------------------------------------

That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

8 posted 2000-03-15 09:29 AM

"Slashed obliquely
   and love
      trickles and
             flows
away

into nonexistence"

Oh, another one from you that most certainly packs a punch....well done

WhtDove
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-07-22

Posts 9245
Illinois

9 posted 2000-03-15 10:03 AM

DA I'd hate to see you go through such hurt, but I tell ya you write some fine poetry from it. I love every line in this one, it speaks to loudly! Once again you've done excellent work putting your feelings down! May the pain heal, but the beauty in your words never stop

~HUGS~

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