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Open Poetry #6
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California

0 posted 2000-03-11 01:24 AM


WINDOW "PAINS"

I stand at the window pane.
It's so cold out here it burns.
It just keeps pouring rain,
I know I'm running out of turns.

The tears, they flow as rivers
From eyes welled within disgrace.
Time never breaking the slivers
Of ice set meek upon my face.

But, God, to look upon her sorrow,
I just want to scream desperately...
"I'm here!, I'm here!" but then I know
Where she is - she can't hear me.

I have no way of reaching her,
All hope dripping away, alas...
She looks at me but then never
Can quite see me through this glass.

And I cry out to the heavens,
Cause it's killing me inside.
But the tears never serve to cleanse,
With this invisible divide.

Answer coming, a shameless tatter
Of a love I just can't hide.
A pane between that just won't shatter,
Leaving us both on the outside.

Michael Anderson


< !signature-->

 For all behind was dark and drear,
And all before was night and fear.
How many hours of night or day
In those suspended pangs I lay,
I could not tell; I scarcely knew
If this were human breath I drew.

Lord Byron






[This message has been edited by Michael (edited 03-12-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Michael Anderson - All Rights Reserved
Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
1 posted 2000-03-11 01:25 AM


Just Thought I'd throw one at you all before I left.
I will see you all again on Monday.   Have a wonderful weekend, everyone.  I know I will.

Michael

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
2 posted 2000-03-11 01:31 AM


Wow! Those last two lines are killers! Loved this one....

Hope you have a great weekend take notes as I'm sure there will be lots of things going on....I've called the California National Organization of Women..told them to hide the single women as you and Chris will be on the loose!!!!

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

3 posted 2000-03-11 01:57 AM


The tears, they flow as rivers
From eyes welled within disgrace.
Time never breaking the slivers
Of ice set meek upon the face.

But, God, to look upon her sorrow,
I just want to scream desperately...
"I'm here!, I'm here!" but then I know
Where she is - she can't hear me.
--------------
And I cry out to the heavens,
Cause it's killing me inside.
But the tears never serve to cleanse,
With this invisible divide.

Answer coming, a shameless tatter
Of a love I just can't hide.
A pane between that just won't shatter,
Leaving us both on the outside.
-------------
do you have a magic poetry invention...some mystical machine that creates amazing poems hour upon hour??? "me thinks" yes...
you should get a patent for it...
call it M's heart...(smile)
another painfully gorgeous poem.
take care, jm

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
4 posted 2000-03-11 09:28 AM


Wonderful poem Michael...well done  
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

5 posted 2000-03-11 08:40 PM


Great poem, Michael!

Denise

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
6 posted 2000-03-12 12:51 PM


Michael, I believe you have inspired me...

Dying

This morning, the air is chilly
and I'm barefoot in the grass
as he sits wondering at the window
staring soulfully through the glass

at my hardened stillness
to see if he can understand
what he gets for his love
what he holds within his hand

Does he see I'm dying
does he realize that I'm weak
no dew on blades this morning
as no words I have to speak

I'm fond of sitting, picking
each blade and slicing it in half
he sits warm where I used to be
pondering how to make me laugh

The roses long wilted still remain
in a vase on the kitchen table
he doesn't see it's me
instead he creates a fable

where the being of me lives
and loves beyond the death
but sifting through the blades of grass
I search my final breath

he's foolish behind the pane
it's memory on which he's relying
fingers falling, he never turns away
but he doesn't see me dying.



 ~shadows dance by the light within~


passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
7 posted 2000-03-13 02:25 PM


I thought this one was great and didn't see why it was all da way at de end ....I'm gonna put it through again. Michael: nice format, rhyme scheme, and concept...I admire those who can do that.
Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
8 posted 2000-03-13 05:21 PM


pdV, Had a wonderful weekend, thank you.  Although I think Chris is developing an inferiority complex of sorts.  He really really wished he could be me...I just can't figure that guy out...LOL

Janet Marie, yeah, I got a machine and the sole patent on it as well.  It's called acute chronic depression coupled with diabetes and an ever abusive, traumatic childhood forcing societal discomfort upon  inner portions of the brain resulting in chemical imbalance that land me precisely on a fine fine line that lies just between creative genious and utter insanity!  I'm selling it though, any offers?

passing shadows, you read into this so well.  And your poetic responce was so beautiful as well.  I'm glad I could inspire such a poem out of you.  Quite a compliment in itself.  Thank you.


Thank you all for the kind replies.


Michael



serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

9 posted 2000-03-14 08:22 PM


Funny, but i believe that you have several
fans in the forum who have felt this same
sentiment for you...and yes, me included.
Love IS all around and it's Incredible Michael...

LittleBoyLost
Junior Member
since 2000-03-14
Posts 28

10 posted 2000-03-14 08:39 PM


Very touching, Michael.  I liked what you did with "panes" and "pains".  But like your other one this could be a lot better if you worked on the meter and didn't force the rhymes.  This was still very touching.
Mistikman
Senior Member
since 2000-01-10
Posts 682
San Jose, CA, USA
11 posted 2000-03-14 08:41 PM


Good poem Michael   I seem to have that too!! No... Wait.... Im missing the diabetes, no wonder my stuff comes out so crappy compared to you! I knew there has to be some reason!  
Rose Red
Junior Member
since 2000-02-29
Posts 10
scotland
12 posted 2000-03-14 09:46 PM


Michael love, I have glass cutters if you need them. *sigh* you are still my favourite poet of all time.
Rose



jbowie
Member
since 2000-02-18
Posts 135
BANGOR (that OR) ME
13 posted 2000-03-14 11:17 PM


Your ability to turn these amazing poems out must be driven by something beyond mortal ken. I am impressed to say the least at how you can understand relationships so well and be able to write out why and what they mean to you. I know that reply is not the most astute but I just Wrelly likd Wht you rote
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