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Passions in Poetry

~ In the Arms of my Ocean ~

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poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite
since 07-25-99
Posts 2961
Arkansas


0 posted 03-09-2000 03:40 PM       View Profile for poetFemmeFatale   Email poetFemmeFatale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for poetFemmeFatale

~  In the Arms of my Ocean  ~


- - Hold me tight - -
My heart is but a vessel on the sea
the waters dark and looming
seem to want to swallow me.
I cannot steer, my sails are ripped to shreds
the strong winds blow me senseless
as this torment through me spreads...

- - Hold me tight - -
I cry out into darkness all around
"Please, I don't want to flounder!"
But I have no voice - no sound.
I try to shoot a flare into the sky
I know no one will see it -
it's my chance to say goodbye.

- - Hold me tight - -
My vessel now is breaking fast apart
I cling to broken splinters
all that's left within my heart.
I know this storm will pass, and I'll be gone
a sunken ship, a memory
a soul tossed for so long.

- - Hold me tight - -
With my final breath, before I close my eyes
I gurgle on the water
and I start to realize...
The waters dark and looming are my peace
the ocean is my Captain
In his arms, is sweet release.

Please hold me tight "O Captain, my captain..."

-flounderingFemmeFatale
March 9, 2000


© Copyright 2000 Gennifer David - All Rights Reserved
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 11-16-1999
Posts 31622
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA


1 posted 03-09-2000 03:56 PM       View Profile for JamesMichael   Email JamesMichael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JamesMichael

This is lovely.  Especially "Please hold me tight O Captain, my Captain."   James
RSEvans
Senior Member
since 10-23-1999
Posts 1187
Tulsa, OK, USA


2 posted 03-09-2000 04:08 PM       View Profile for RSEvans   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RSEvans

Perhaps you've already read "The Ship"? from Open #2 or #3 (don't remember).  I would be happy to repost it if you like.  I think it fits you better than this one.
poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite
since 07-25-99
Posts 2961
Arkansas


3 posted 03-09-2000 04:12 PM       View Profile for poetFemmeFatale   Email poetFemmeFatale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for poetFemmeFatale

Yes Robert, please do repost!  I would love to read it if I haven't already....maybe I need to REread it!     Actually, this morbid piece fits me like a glove right now.      Nothing like feeling like your drowning, and there's no one within reach to grab onto...just sucking seawater, I am.  It burns.
RSEvans
Senior Member
since 10-23-1999
Posts 1187
Tulsa, OK, USA


4 posted 03-09-2000 04:31 PM       View Profile for RSEvans   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RSEvans

seawater sucks...Your repost is on the board.  Keep in mind though, you are not alone.  And you need some grease for those wheels...LOL
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


5 posted 03-09-2000 05:10 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

This is so painful but beautiful too--I wish you a life raft from this turbulance.
Danny Holloway
Member Elite
since 01-15-2000
Posts 2072
Tulsa, OK


6 posted 03-09-2000 06:00 PM       View Profile for Danny Holloway   Email Danny Holloway   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Danny Holloway

My close friends call me Captain.  and your wish is my command.(smile)
Very nice poem.  you are a wonderful poet.
Bet you haven't heard that before.
Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 11-23-1999
Posts 15611
Lansing, MI USA


7 posted 03-09-2000 10:43 PM       View Profile for Sven   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sven

Please allow me to throw you a life jacket and a life preserver. . .

Now, what are you going to do with them?

-------------------------------------------

 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

jbowie
Member
since 02-18-2000
Posts 137
BANGOR (that OR) ME


8 posted 03-10-2000 12:11 AM       View Profile for jbowie   Email jbowie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for jbowie

You do very well with your method of writing. Absolute great flow through out. You do show a great deal of lost hope and pain in acceptance of your situation. This is a very good piece and I just wanted to let you know that I really undertood this, at what you must have also been through to be able to produce such a heartfelt poem

 A real man
kisses his children goodnight
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 01-03-2000
Posts 8382


9 posted 03-10-2000 12:56 AM       View Profile for bsquirrel   Email bsquirrel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for bsquirrel

pFF,

Now this is one I can believe. My favorite is the line about sending up a flare; it's a chance to say goodbye. Anything I said about your light-hearted treatment in the other poem is null and void. This one's great!

Mike
Compgirl
Member
since 02-19-2000
Posts 88
USA


10 posted 03-10-2000 01:01 AM       View Profile for Compgirl   Email Compgirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Compgirl

Very nice..you have painted that picture in my mind..
jazzgal
Junior Member
since 03-07-2000
Posts 38


11 posted 03-10-2000 01:08 AM       View Profile for jazzgal   Email jazzgal   Edit/Delete Message     View IP for jazzgal

Very deep, emotional...  I liked the part:  "The waters dark and looming are my peace/the ocean is my Captain/In his arms, is sweet release."  It does seem that the dark can be a "sweet release" of all the things you've gone through.  I don't know if this is from life, but it seems so true...
Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 07-17-99
Posts 8273


12 posted 03-10-2000 03:38 AM       View Profile for Severn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Severn

Oh Gen...how I know this!

Hugs ok - and good work.

K

 'Writing sharpens life;
life enriches writing'
Sylvia Plath
EagleOne
Member Elite
since 03-07-2000
Posts 2858
Between a laugh and a tear...


13 posted 03-11-2000 11:52 PM       View Profile for EagleOne   Email EagleOne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for EagleOne

I am only new to netpoets but I shall keep returning. It's a hunmbling experience to compare the work of real poets such as yourself with my own. Great work, sad that you feel this way though.
Just thought i should clarify the term "real poets" before someone takes offence, was refering to my own lack of ability compared to all those I have read on netpoets.

[This message has been edited by EagleOne (edited 03-12-2000).]
MyPenNameIsSam
Member
since 03-06-2000
Posts 94
usa


14 posted 03-12-2000 01:14 AM       View Profile for MyPenNameIsSam   Email MyPenNameIsSam   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for MyPenNameIsSam

Once again a beautiful poem, Femme    You grasp that "drowning in life" feeling very well.  
-molly aka sam

 "One does not discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time." -Andre Gide

EagleScorpion
Senior Member
since 03-08-2000
Posts 1705
Here, Now, Forever


15 posted 03-12-2000 01:22 AM       View Profile for EagleScorpion   Email EagleScorpion   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for EagleScorpion

you have strongly captured the fear of sinking in a ship, yet the meaning of this wonderful read lies at further depths. Spellbinding
 
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