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Passions in Poetry

Untitled

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Marilyn
Member Elite
since 09-26-1999
Posts 2646
Ontario, Canada


0 posted 03-09-2000 03:28 PM       View Profile for Marilyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Marilyn

Look here deep within my eyes,
And tell me what you see.
Can you see beneath my skin,
To the hidden part of me?

People see my competence,
My strength and my smile.
They see me handle anything,
But not my inner child.

They see a solid body frame,
That easily handles pain.
But can they see my weary heart,
Where frailty still remains?

Nothing in this six foot frame,
Speaks of weakness from within.
I need the shelter from the rain,
Just like the small and thin.

No one to stand up for me,
No strong arms in which to hide.
No gentle hands to handle,
The soft and vulnerable side.

Each time I have to brush me off,
After falling down face first.
My poor and wounded, lonely heart,
Gets harder with the thirst.

So please look deeper then my skin,
Past all my little faults.
Protect me from this wicked world,
And all it's hurtful assaults.
© Copyright 2000 Marilyn - All Rights Reserved
mete out
Member
since 02-16-2000
Posts 273
england


1 posted 03-09-2000 03:33 PM       View Profile for mete out   Email mete out   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for mete out

***Marilyn,
You echo alot of my feelings here....it seems that most people feel like others are blind to their hurt...this is not always the case however...sometimes you need to be patient....

A fantastically writen piece.


 I am not a preacher, I just speak the world as I see it.
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


2 posted 03-09-2000 03:46 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

What a lovely look at the child within--I know, I have one too and I found if I nurture her, she takes better care of me.
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


3 posted 03-09-2000 06:35 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

If only everyone would judge us not by the exterior person but by the true inner person, the world would be a better place to live.  Good poem!
First__Knight
Senior Member
since 11-08-1999
Posts 688


4 posted 03-09-2000 07:57 PM       View Profile for First__Knight   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for First__Knight

Good Lady Mariyn,

You have always been here for me and I in turn wish to be there for you.  I will never be anything less than that to you ever.  This is written so well and it truly speaks of your talent.  Knock and it will be opend and seek and it shall be found.  Miss your cute laugh too.....

 There are two kinds of pedestrians...the quick and the dead. Drive it like you stole it.

Marilyn
Member Elite
since 09-26-1999
Posts 2646
Ontario, Canada


5 posted 03-09-2000 09:03 PM       View Profile for Marilyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marilyn

mete out....Thankyou for your insight and I understand what you are saying. I love being capable and strong. Someday I would like someone to appreciate my weakness as well as my strength.

Martie....I think I have forgotten how to nurture my inner child. She has been neglected for so long now.


[This message has been edited by Marilyn (edited 03-09-2000).]
Marilyn
Member Elite
since 09-26-1999
Posts 2646
Ontario, Canada


6 posted 03-09-2000 09:18 PM       View Profile for Marilyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marilyn

Hmmm between my blondness and my system hicuping...I hope I can get through the rest of this reply.

Sharon...I agree completely. You can assertain much by the way someone carries themselves and how well they take care of themselves. The rest should be forgotten.

David... You are a sweetie. I am fine, just needed to vent a little in this piece. Being 5'11 and female sometimes has it's disadavntages.  
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


7 posted 03-09-2000 09:19 PM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

this is a sweet and emotionally perfect poem, I related to your words so well,
how about "The Innocent Inner Child"
or "Inner Child Beneath My Skin"
"Looking For The Child With In"...

OR how about me shuttin up  and letting you pick your own title...(smile)
wonderful poem.
take care,janet marie

 you're really alone at last...
you're bored and fading fast,
if it's true you'll fall from the past
all you'll have to do is ask
you'll feel but never be
you want and always need
price you pay for wanting to see
will you have all you've ever dreamed...
robin wilson

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


8 posted 03-09-2000 10:56 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Marilyn, your inner self shows in everything you post here....and it's a beautiful look at you.  
Mistikman
Senior Member
since 01-10-2000
Posts 729
San Jose, CA, USA


9 posted 03-10-2000 12:44 AM       View Profile for Mistikman   Email Mistikman   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mistikman

Wow Marilyn, you described my situation incredibly well, even though you did not intend to. This is very well written, and oozing with truth. Everyone sees me as the rock of Gibralter(sp?), but fail to see what I have to deal with in my life, or just assume it doesnt phase me. Such is life I guess.
Compgirl
Member
since 02-19-2000
Posts 88
USA


10 posted 03-10-2000 12:52 AM       View Profile for Compgirl   Email Compgirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Compgirl

INCREDIBLE how you can describe such sad feelings with such wonderful form. We can all realate much too well.. Thank you for shareing!
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


11 posted 03-10-2000 12:57 AM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Marilyn~
You shine with your writing.
This one is extremely well done.
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

sonjes
Senior Member
since 02-18-2000
Posts 573
North Carolina


12 posted 03-10-2000 01:04 AM       View Profile for sonjes   Email sonjes   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for sonjes

Very intelligently written piece.  Your explorations of your "child within" are marvelous. Bravo, Marilyn.

  Don't care what people say
Just follow your own way
Don't give up and use the chance
To return to innocence.
-Enigma
Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 07-17-99
Posts 8273


13 posted 03-10-2000 01:04 AM       View Profile for Severn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Severn

This just brought a tear to my eye, Marilyn - it is lovely and one I can easily relate to though I am not tall!

Well done.

K

 'Writing sharpens life;
life enriches writing'
Sylvia Plath
Marilyn
Member Elite
since 09-26-1999
Posts 2646
Ontario, Canada


14 posted 03-10-2000 07:56 AM       View Profile for Marilyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marilyn

I never realized how many people feel the same way I do. Thankyou all for your responses. I may have to do some more pondering on this.  
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


15 posted 03-10-2000 12:17 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Everyone deserves to be seen for more than what's on the exterior. Sometimes the strongest are the weakest and vice versa...it's maintaining a healthy combination of exterior and interior that presents a challenge sometimes. Nice poem  
 
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