How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Archives
 Open Poetry #6 Archive
 Image
 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
Follow us on Facebook

 This is an Archive. You may post a reply, but new topics are not allowed.

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

Image

 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 12-21-1999
Posts 5742
Southern Abstentia


0 posted 03-09-2000 02:15 PM       View Profile for Local Rebel   Email Local Rebel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Local Rebel

Later,
After the dust all cleared
I looked around to see
If anyone had noticed

Like the time
I entered my code in
At the automated car wash
And when I went to roll the
Window up
It got stuck about an inch from the top

Those electric motors
Are crap
I know
I was in on em
When they engineered emů
Just enough power to put
The window up
Cause if we put in one
Smidgen more
Fraction of a horsepower
It would cost too damn
Much and those poor
Automotive manufacturing companies
Would lose a couple of
Nickels profit on each car
Which is pretty serious money
When you stop to think
About how many cars
There are out there
With windows that won't roll up
All the way the first time

So I pulled into the carwash thinking
The overload relay would surely cool
In time for me to put
The damn window up before
The wash cycle started
And it moved about five
Sixteenths of an inch

But that was it
And it stuck there
And those floppy twirly mops
Started spinning around
And water and soap
Started misting out of the
Nozzles
And it was coming into the car
And my nifty new dockers were
Getting soaked

In a straight line
Like a stripe
Right down the front of my leg
And I looked then to see if the
Person in the car behind me
Could see that I was a moron
Who pulled into
The car wash with a stuck
Window

And I looked around the stuff I had in
The back seat for some salvation
Only a plastic grocery bag
I used for cigar wrappers
Good thing I didn't take paper
That day

But it only covered about 3/4
Of the length of the open crack
So water still came in
Under high pressure
As I fought it off with my
Grocery bag

Now this may all seem funny to you
But really
At the time
I wasn't laughing

Because the damn car
Companies had my two nickels
And I wanted them back
Just then

So
After the dust settled
There I was
Feeling like I was in that
Friggin car wash again
Looking around to see if
Anybody was looking

But,
As luck would have it
Nobody had seen me
Hit that little patch of gravel
And go skidding across
The pavement
On my head
While the dragon raked
A hole in my boot ripping
The flesh off of half my
Foot

But of course
I didn't yet realize
That all this had happened
Because
I was still more
Worried about
My Image
Than
Me.



 Hate is a dead thing. Who of you would be a tomb? -Kahlil Gibran
© Copyright 2000 Local Rebel - All Rights Reserved
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


1 posted 03-09-2000 02:18 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Excellent! Sorry, but I did laugh at the vision of you stuffing your plastic bag into the window. But your ending was superb! Good one LR.
Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


2 posted 03-09-2000 02:21 PM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

Wonderful writing! (sorry about your foot. And your boot. And your pants. Oh, and the window. And your nickels. And, hell, your image...sorry...)

*smile*

~ Claire
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


3 posted 03-09-2000 02:35 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

That's okay, dear nephew... no matter how battered your image, you'll never be completely without charm. *G*

I love this... though I must admit a few giggles at your expense before I remembered I should be the concerned auntie... need my crutches? *G*
Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 12-21-1999
Posts 5742
Southern Abstentia


4 posted 03-09-2000 02:35 PM       View Profile for Local Rebel   Email Local Rebel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Local Rebel

The things that make us grow up.. eh? oh -- this is all from many moons ago... my foot has been healed for about 15 years now.. LOL.. but thanks for the crutches anyway

[This message has been edited by Local Rebel (edited 03-09-2000).]
Corazon
Senior Member
since 02-02-2000
Posts 1301


5 posted 03-09-2000 05:36 PM       View Profile for Corazon   Email Corazon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corazon

loved this ROFG...so you are human after all? lol...and your image is precious, you are the most gorgeous poet I know...
oh...you meant image not image...
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


6 posted 03-10-2000 07:56 AM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

ROTFLMAO..... I loooooove this....  

...as I look around me every time to see if anyone sees me as I open my electric window to open the door of the stupid jaguar from the outside because it doesn't work from the inside and close the window before I shut off the engine or else the window won't shut and then I disconnect the battery when I stop for too long because some stupid little motor keeps running when the engine is off and kills the battery and then I reconnect the battery when I get back in the car and I have to start the car before I shut the door because otherwise I'd have to climb over the console and get out the passenger side to fiddle with the battery connection because my door won't open until I put the window down which I can't do unless there's juice from the battery of course if the battery goes dead I would have to find a plug to jump start the stupid car with my trusty dusty battery jumper that I carry with me in the trunk everywhere I go... so I don't have to call Triple A...  ... I sure hope no one is looking....


Awesome poem....  
small>

[This message has been edited by Nan (edited 03-10-2000).]
Corazon
Senior Member
since 02-02-2000
Posts 1301


7 posted 03-13-2000 09:45 AM       View Profile for Corazon   Email Corazon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corazon

lol no kidding nan...this made me think of a car I had...would just shut down for no apparant reason...a part was overheating but they couldn't say which and electical parts are nonrefundable adn the cheapest choice was $400...my daughter and I actually got the timing down pretty good as we would jump out and push it through lights...bank driveups...sigh...just had to throw image out the window on that one...was too much to wish no one was watching when all the cars have to stop and wait for you to push yourself out of the way...some cars you don't miss when they are gone...great poem LR..thanks for sharing your image with us  
Shelley
Member
since 01-27-2000
Posts 269
Ohio, USA


8 posted 03-13-2000 10:22 AM       View Profile for Shelley   Email Shelley   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Shelley

LOL... this is so funny and I'm not done reading yet.

Sorry about the mishap, glad it was only your foot (and pride) that was hurt. I should have read its entirety before opening my mouth *BUT* it is still very amusing. The treachery of the carwash can be so unforgiving. LMAO

This is a great read!!!!

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


9 posted 03-13-2000 10:28 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

LOL....I thought I was the only one who did things like that  
infinat3 sadn3ss
Member
since 02-14-2000
Posts 86
somerset england


10 posted 03-13-2000 03:52 PM       View Profile for infinat3 sadn3ss   Email infinat3 sadn3ss   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for infinat3 sadn3ss

this is a phenomenal metaphor.arent egos killers?
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


11 posted 03-13-2000 08:19 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

ROFL...this is delightful!! Some things are just so funny in hindsight aren't they, but not so funny when they are happening! Excellent writing!

Denise
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


12 posted 03-13-2000 08:41 PM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Rebel~
Why am I laughing?
Reminds me of a flip I took off my front patio many years ago.

The weather was freezing (Florida no less)
and I turned on the sprinklers so my children could see 'icicles' the next morning.  In the night I went out and added food color to the ice in lovely rainbow colors.  Also colored glitter to make it fancy. (what mom's do for kids!)

Morning came and a photographer called to say he was coming to take pictures of the winter wonderland ... I scurried out to turn off the sprinklers and when I hit the patio (which was frozen over) I did the most ungraceful gymnastic flip ( a complete flip) and landed unceremoniously on my butt.
Hurt?  Yeah, it hurt alright.  But all I could do was scamper in hoping the neighbors didn't see me.
  
The pictures made the newspaper and I hurt for days after.  And then because no one actually 'saw' it and felt sorry for me ... I ended up telling them all about it.  Go figure!

Enjoyed this memory shaker !
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Local Rebel will be notified of replies
 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Archives >> Open Poetry #6 >> Image Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors