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Passions in Poetry

In Stone

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Member Ascendant
since 08-13-99
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0 posted 03-08-2000 10:10 PM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Michael


If I've learned one thing from life,
Well, nothing's etched in stone.
I woke up with her by my side,
But I woke up alone.

I swore she was there with me
The night I took the fall.
Yet only "my" integrity
Is put on trial at all.

We spun upon the carousel,
The world turned black and white.
I'd fallen beneath her spell,
Lost track of wrong and right.

I only gave her all of me,
I offered up my soul.
I guess she gave but her body,
Now I lack self control!

Still the winds of change blow harshly,
I'm a stalker if I call.
And so I look the other way,
Now I never loved her at all!

The frustration is killing me,
Why must I bear this shame...
When I swore by Destiny,
We would share my last name.

Time heals all wounds they say,
So I must just be dead.
With my eternal price to pay,
Her voice still in my head.

Always there to remind me,
One sin takes you to hell.
Yeah, the passion we shared blindly,
Still it's only me who fell!

Michael Anderson

'Tis true, Love lasts forever,
Only her memory slips away.

[This message has been edited by Michael (edited 03-09-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 Michael Anderson - All Rights Reserved
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since 08-13-99
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1 posted 03-08-2000 10:13 PM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

I apologize to all for this.  I've been taking serious efforts to change the theme of my poetry of late...  Yet I can't help but feel like a human dart board at times...  So many things said so unnecessarily have really gotten to me.

It's hard to ignore your sentence when the judge never let you speak. But it's even harder to ignore the pain in silence when you're still catchin' elbows.  I am trying, though, I swear...

Janet Marie
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since 01-22-2000
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2 posted 03-08-2000 10:19 PM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

once again I say...DONT apologize for this one M,... dont apologize for any honest expression of emotion...write what you will in time... help you heal.

 ...every moment of every day...
your still with me in every way.
every poem and song...
every rhyme and verse...
your still a beautiful curse.
janet marie

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Member Rara Avis
since 06-07-99
Posts 7296
America the beautiful

3 posted 03-08-2000 10:22 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

No, don't apologize, Michael. Who hasn't been through a time like this? Just keep on writing and posting and know everyone is here for you.


 "He have his goodness now. God forbid I take it from him!"
-The Crucible

Lost Dreamer
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since 06-20-99
Posts 2589
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4 posted 03-08-2000 10:38 PM       View Profile for Lost Dreamer   Email Lost Dreamer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lost Dreamer

Michael, I totally see where you are coming from and may God bless you to get through all the trials that get thrown at you. One day the light will be bright enough to guide you through the darkest tunnel, until then you have all of us here to help whenever you need. Your poetry is a wonderful release and you are so gifted with the talent that whatever you write comes out brilliant.
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since 01-10-2000
Posts 729
San Jose, CA, USA

5 posted 03-08-2000 10:55 PM       View Profile for Mistikman   Email Mistikman   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mistikman

Sigh, I cant help but feel a certain empathy for you Michael on certain aspects here, due to my own little bizarre trip through the land of love and rejection. The feeling of being judged without having a say, feeling like a stalker just for wanting to show the feelings I feel... Sigh... Excellent poem Michael, it touched me.
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since 02-10-2000
Posts 2267
Pickering, Ontario

6 posted 03-08-2000 11:24 PM       View Profile for Marina   Email Marina   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marina

Michael, I know right now you still feel such pain;but believe it or not it will go away. Not necessary today or tommarrow but little by little it will fade.  Everyone has at some time felt this way and though at this moment it doesn't look like that to you.  Just keep thinking happy thoughts and happiness will follow. Tomorrow is another day!

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since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317

7 posted 03-08-2000 11:37 PM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

  You write with integrity and intelligence, Michael, and with a pen fluid with emotion. Let it flow, dear poetic friend, let it flow.

~ Claire
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
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8 posted 03-08-2000 11:54 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Everything for a reason right? God's timing is perfect. This is your release, so don't apologize.  Just keep writing, your poetry has been nothing less than awesome!  God shall shine that rainbow across you soon. Give yourself some time. We'll all still be here whether you're feeling down or better  
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since 03-05-2000
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9 posted 03-09-2000 12:36 AM       View Profile for StarrGazer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for StarrGazer

Never apologize for writing your feelings out ... you do it so well !!!
I've been taking serious efforts to change the theme of my poetry of late...
I never really noticed until I came to this forum that most of my poems have a depressing undertone, I searched through them all knowing that I had to have a "happy" poem somewhere to post somewhere other than Dark Passions I found two that was kind of depressing in itself ... so tonight I sat here and tried to write a "happy" poem and the words would just not flow properly  guess I need to work on changing the mood of some of my poems too  Good luck to you in your efforts !!!

 ~*Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear*~
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Posts 3189
Northern Cali

10 posted 03-09-2000 01:27 AM       View Profile for devina   Email devina   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for devina

Like was said before Michael, never apologize when your pain transforms so damn beautifully!!! Tis overwhelming to feel so much of you dripping from this piece!! Keep writing and keep dealing with it m'dear...friends will always help you make it through!!!

 Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...
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since 01-06-2000
Posts 3135
... the old black rum

11 posted 03-09-2000 02:17 AM       View Profile for Parker   Email Parker   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Parker's Home Page   View IP for Parker

Michael, You write with so much bitter truth, in this piece. There was only one time in my life that I felt this way, and I truly cringe at the thought of it. My heart goes out to you, fight those demons with all your might.

A Romantic Heart
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since 09-03-99
Posts 5497
Forever In Your Heart

12 posted 03-09-2000 02:26 AM       View Profile for A Romantic Heart   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for A Romantic Heart

Michael, I have felt the more I write poetry, the more it bleeds or purges my heart, keep writing your true emotion, be true to yourself, when no one else will. Sometimes our hearts deceive us to whom we truely love, we get caught up in the dream, the fantasy, the romance, and it is hard to sift the truth through it all. I guess that is the downside of being a poet...a dreamer.
There are far too many fishes in the sea,
this is just another stepping stone...a step closer to the real person of your dreams(and Poems). Take care! keep posting!  

 "Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove.
O,no! it is an ever-fixed mark....William Shakespeare

[This message has been edited by A Romantic Heart (edited 03-09-2000).]
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since 10-23-1999
Posts 1187
Tulsa, OK, USA

13 posted 03-09-2000 06:35 AM       View Profile for RSEvans   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RSEvans

I know I've missed a lot...somewhere...but this is indeed a beautiful piece.  Feel free to let me know if you need a shoulder or someone to listen, Michael.  I'll do what I can.
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14 posted 03-09-2000 09:03 AM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

Janet, thank you - I do write to heal and in time I will.  It's just so hard sometimes when people won't stop picking the scabs.

Liz, thank you, it's so nice to have true friends who you know are there for you no matter what.

Gloria, you have been so wonderful in helping me maintain my focus on God through this whole ordeal.  I can't thank you enough.  I still see that light.    

Mistikman, I am only sorry you can relate so well.  I can think of at least a hundred ancient tortures I'd rather be going through at this point.  Indeed, never having even gotten a chance to speak is the worst of it all.

Marina, In all truth, I can't wait for tomorrow.  I know there's a sun gonna shine on me someday.  Thank you.

Claire, those are high compliments, indeed...especially coming from a poet of your stature.  I will continue to let it flow, what else can I do?

Rebecca, your support has been forthright from the very beginning.  I know I can trust in you.  I can't thank you enough either.

StarrGazer, maybe I should have reworded what I said earlier.  I have tried to change the "subject" of my poetry of late...but I could never change the emotion that goes into to my poetry.  Lord know I could never write a "happy" in the middle of a blue spell.  Still, this particular subject is one I have gracefully tried to leave behind me but seems to keep being thrown in me face.  I figure a lot of people here might have grown tired of it - I certainly know I have...that is why I would much rather leave it in the past where it belongs and write of something else - even if it's sad also.  Please never try to write opposite of what you feel - it never "flows" when you're forcing emotion.    

devina, could use another one of those hugs long about now.  Maybe that shoulder too... thank you for "always" being there.  You don't know what it has meant to me, truly.

Haleyja, I will fight them with everything I have...'tis a bitter truth, indeed.

A Rmantic heart, Indeed it is hard to sift that truth at times...  it is sad kind of - but I will never stop being a poet, or a dreamer, even so.  Thank you for such an enlightening perspective.  I'm actually smiling now...  

Robert, Indeed there is much you have missed.  Still, as I said earlier, I really hope all this can be left in the past.  I honor you, your friendship and every member of your family dearly.  I truly regret all that has happened, and even more so the extremes it has been taken to.  Please just know above all, I never meant to hurt anyone here...especially those I held so dear to heart.

Thank you all for the replies.


[This message has been edited by Michael (edited 03-09-2000).]
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15 posted 03-09-2000 09:34 AM       View Profile for poetFemmeFatale   Email poetFemmeFatale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for poetFemmeFatale

We had said we wouldn't reply to eachothers poems, and thus far have done pretty good.  I do feel I need to say something to you here.  I too fell, as you should know.  I struggled with guilt for several days on the trip, not knowing how to deal with what I was feeling.  We had such great expectations, which I think was part of our downfall.  Had our expectations not been set so far out of reach, we wouldn't have been so overwhelmed with trying to make the *perfect trip* - we would have just relaxed and had a great time.  The pressure was too much for anyone.  You have forgotten how much I hurt from the fact that we got our priorities out of order, after having discussed it.  I wanted to get to know you...not jump in over our heads.  I never got that chance.  Neither did you.  All we experienced was the ugliness of emotions running rampid, which comes from that territory of intimacy.  I don't think the Open forum is really the place to discuss topics like that - publicly, as we both have family here that read, including your son.  I've read your poem here, and I too, have been judged as having no integrity, as if I wasn't hurt at all in this.  We were both hurt, both disappointed, and we are both paying the price.  BOTH paying the price.  There are many in here who won't even reply to my works now...don't think I haven't felt the brunt of this too.  You're not alone in your pain as you somehow believe.      Sincerely,  Gennifer
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Member Seraphic
since 01-18-2000
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with you

16 posted 03-09-2000 09:38 AM       View Profile for SEA   Email SEA   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SEA

Michael~ you shouldn't feel as though you have to apologize for what's in your heart. Your words are always so touching,so many of us can relate. Expressing how you feel will allow you to close that door, or at least make it so you can stop looking in it every few minutes! Your poetry is amazing and I really enjoy reading it. I am sorry for your hurting heart though. -SEA
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since 07-05-99
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Glen Hope, PA USA

17 posted 03-09-2000 09:42 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Michael...never appologize for a great poem despite how depressing the subject matter is. Poetry speaks of feelings, all feelings are not good. This poem, though, is better that good it's great. Well done  
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18 posted 03-09-2000 10:31 AM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

Gen, I will say this as politely as I can.  You insist on tabbing a "we" in front of emotions you either feel or have felt alone.  You have never spoken to me of these issues so I take exception to the fact you keep doing this.  

I never expected anything to be "perfect".  I did however have an opinion to offer when things went askew.  An opinion you wouldn't acknowledge then, (on the trip), nor after we returned home to our respective states.  We had a series of broken emails which were highly misunderstood and yet, you refused to even speak with me via phone or ICQ.  You implied obsessiveness on my part - so I backed completely away.  That's not a term I take lightly or would have anyone, especially someone I care for thinking of me.  I think you are oh so right that the open forum is no place to discuss this but then there has never been another availible option left for me, has there.  Even in this, I have tried to say nothing but I keep getting the slaps in the face, thus this poem.

You seem to be willing to share every emotion with a "we" except for the guilt.  That you take on alone.  You think I have no shame and you are wrong in this accessment.  I know "we" made a mistake - but "our" love was far to precious to me to completely throw everything away as you did after but one day.  I thought if you loved someone, you worked things out together.  It made for a very uncomfotable rest of the trip for me to say the least - knowing my days were numbered, and yet every action from day one you held over me in judgemnet and added to your case you were building against me.  I truly don't understand why it had to be like that.  I could have accepted a "friendly" goodbye and I would have hoped we could have continued to co-exist on these forums in a "friendly" manner.

Yet your actions continued to baffle me even further.  Though all I ever wanted was a chance to talk this thing out - a chance to share an opinion - to possibly work on things together and if they were not workable, then to at least know "we" had tried, I soon knew that was was clearly too much to ask.  You urged me to "move on" in an email.  In doing so, I thought all had been cleared up and we were "moving on" respectively.  Next thing I know - my love has been labeled "untrue" publically for doing such and you are deleting your posts.  I still don't know what led to those actions nor do I think I really want to.

I do know we BOTH hurt, Gen.  But you alone chose not to try to heal the hurt.  You alone judged me, "saying I spoke just what you wanted to hear" which is so unfair.  We both made a mistake - yet you held mine over my head as unforgiveable and still do. There were promises we made on both parts if I remember...I told you I never wanted to be intimate with you unless you were sure it was gonna be forever because I knew the pain it would cause me and you agreed...yet you question my pain even after the fact.  

I know not what to say anymore, Gen.  I have tried not writing about "us" yet every time I do it seems to fuel your fire worse than when I was writing of you.  I have given you the space you required - and been labled untrue for doing such.  I see no way of appeasing you in any manner so I ask you to please just let it go.  Nothing will ever be resolved, especially in the open forum as you put it.

I think we both owe a little more to Passions than to let it continue any further and I surely don't want people talking sides again on a battle that never should have taken place to begin with (my opinion, of course).

In All Sincerity


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19 posted 03-09-2000 10:45 AM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

SEA and Ruth,

I appreciate your replies, sorry I din't cath them earlier, they snook in on me.    

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20 posted 03-09-2000 11:01 AM       View Profile for poetFemmeFatale   Email poetFemmeFatale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for poetFemmeFatale

Michael, I slap only when I've been slapped.  I've lost count of the number of times you've mentioned my lies, my faults, in your poetry.  Which is where that originated from.  Your comment on my just "professing" morals really hurt.  Don't think your subtle lines and comments are invisible, they hurt.  Just because something is masked in a poem, doesn't make it any less a slap.  Ron was very supportive in saying we were both allowed the freedom to express the good with the bad here, and I respect that.  Although I didn't think it would be very "productive" to talk, I told you to feel free to email me with the issues you wanted to unload.  I never once received an email after that.  We had already said enough at that time to do irreversible damage, so why do more?  How am I the only one slapping here?   Should we count the times and compare numbers?  Once two people have been hurt, I don't understand why they would want to continue hurting eachother...especially when at one time, they had what seemed to be Love for eachother.  Please, let's both stop hurting, and slapping.  I do wish to talk to you...I will email you soon.  Gennifer
BTW, I read your poem in was wonderful, and it really made me think.  Thanks.  We are both so much MORE when we are focused on what we know to be right...Please help me stay focused Michael.  You know it feels better when we do.  You should write more in Spiritual - you're darn good in there - that is the Michael that truly shines in darkness.  Thanks for hearing me out.
since 02-19-2000
Posts 88

21 posted 03-09-2000 12:15 PM       View Profile for Compgirl   Email Compgirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Compgirl

I couldn't help but to respond. Sorry! Maybe you two should find GOD in your hearts and let him start the healing!! Without him you do not exist. GOD forgives, maybe you two can also follow HIS example. Love takes time and patience and UNDERSTANDING..
GOD bless and I hopet that you both let GOD in.
since 03-06-2000
Posts 94

22 posted 03-09-2000 01:47 PM       View Profile for MyPenNameIsSam   Email MyPenNameIsSam   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for MyPenNameIsSam

Dear Michael,
I don't know you yet, but I'd have to agree with the others--Don't apologize for this piece of poetry.  Poetry is something that should never be apologized for-imo.  It's something that can be one of the most useful tools in getting us through some of our most difficult experiences in life, as you seem to be going through at the moment.
     This is a wonderful piece of work and I appreciate that you shared it with us.  It must be very difficult to go through the things that it sounds as though you're experiencing.  I'm glad you have a way (poetry) and a place (here) to express some of the feelings and pain that this is causing you.  Good luck with this and I'll be thinking of you.
molly aka sam

 "Always be willing to sacrifice what you believe, for the truth."-jps
since 02-18-2000
Posts 137

23 posted 03-09-2000 11:07 PM       View Profile for jbowie   Email jbowie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for jbowie

Ok Gen or femmefatale(nice choice considering)

I see only that I knew nothing of what went on between mike and you until you took it upon yourself to reply and bring the whole poetry and prose arena into the meaning behind this. I am not judging either of you, but he never did mention your name or anything even close in the content of this poem. So it falls to you to have brought attention to this poem to those friends and family or other new P&P members who only saw this poem as a good expression of a failed relationship and the natural regret and disillusionment(sp sorry) that follows as par for the course. Ok I have said my piece on the response, but just let me say that I enjoyed the poem and it's content as a tool for someone who is just trying to work thru their pain, be it shared or not.

 A real man
kisses his children goodnight
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24 posted 03-09-2000 11:34 PM       View Profile for poetFemmeFatale   Email poetFemmeFatale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for poetFemmeFatale

Hi there Mr. Bowie....FemmeFatale here.  

Yeah, I'm feeling pretty fiesty tonight, so if you're looking for a boxing partner, I'm your girl!  ROFL

Actually sir, several, and I mean SEVERAL lines in this poem are written in direct reference to our everyone in here already knows - if you've participated much in here at all, you know that.  The signature alone gives it away...  
Nonetheless, I can see how one could assess what you have, not knowing our situation.  You're intitled to your own opinion.  I've made my peace with Michael to a degree, and at this point, truly, his opinion is the only one I care to hear, as this is our relationship - not anyone else's.  Most are smart enough to remain neutral, as we share many of the same friends in here.  I usually don't bite, but I do believe I feel one coming on....     
Signed ever so sweetly -  poetFemmeFatale    
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