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Open Poetry #6
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California

0 posted 2000-02-22 05:04 PM


It is Made of Tears

A house of stone, wood,
ivy and wood shingles,
with enormous porch
filled with potted plants
and wicker.
The camellia bushes press,
fuchsia line the steps,
a walnut tree
hides the sun.

Down a weed-sprinkled path
is the old hen house
where no hen remains,
only spiders,
weeds and vines
invade the doors and windows.  
Measure the room
with footprints in the dust,
a child’s bare feet.
It measures ten footprints
in every direction.

Down a long hall
is a room
with the closet smell of mothballs
absorbed by kimono
high heels, and hat.
The bed against the wall
swallows in softness.
Above the dresser
naked cherubs cavort
around a mirror
in plump innocence.

The sound of crow’s laughter
comes from the pine across the street
before the door opens
to the smell of Listerine.

Blue blanket
made of satin.
In the center
a yellow felt bunny,
tattered and frayed
as if rubbed many times.
Painful to hold now,
its comfort gone for years.

It is really made of tears.

A glimpse
of some sort of sadness
covered now and stuffed
with the comfort of satin.
Inhale the essence
of soft barbed wire
and unlock the door
to healing.



[This message has been edited by Martie (edited 02-22-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
Beki
Senior Member
since 1999-09-15
Posts 1569
Newport Beach, CA, USA
1 posted 2000-02-22 05:50 PM


The imagery here is outstanding, I was walking through it all with you. Good work!
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
2 posted 2000-02-22 06:15 PM


Wow! An excellent piece of writing, Martie, full of images and scents and touch, I feel as though I'm there witnessing, and smelling and feeling the emotions of this poem
You are wonderful
liz

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
3 posted 2000-02-22 07:20 PM


Martie,
wonderful paint, wonderful writing, woderful poem. *L* Sy

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
4 posted 2000-02-22 08:39 PM


Becky, Liz and Sy, thank you for reading and for your sweet replies.  
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
5 posted 2000-02-22 09:03 PM


Martie~
Without a doubt,
you make me see and be.
I hug you with my heart, my friend.
~*Marge*~



 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Dr.Moose1
Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448
Bewilderment , USA
6 posted 2000-02-22 10:24 PM


The sense of loss is apparent in this piece.
One can only hope that it was softened by this writing .Embrace what gives you joy ,
and find comfort in your strengths.
Doc

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
7 posted 2000-02-22 10:44 PM


Marge, thank you as always for you lovingness.

Dr Moose, this poem is not about loss but about healing.  This was a memory from my childhood, some of which hurt.  The meaning is about looking at pain in order to heal the hurt and move on.  Thank you for your comments.

Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
8 posted 2000-02-22 10:58 PM


Beautiful, with wonderful imagery Martie.  I did indeed feel the twinge of sadness, but the overall feeling of hope and healing.

 *Krista Knutson*

"Every moment marked with apparitions of your soul...." ~*Sarah McLachlan- Do What You Have To Do*~


Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

9 posted 2000-02-22 11:03 PM


Such work you've done here with this piece, Martie. Not only are the images so well placed and tactile references so easily felt, but it seems that you are able to, by the poem's end, soften the barbed wire, even if only a tiny bit. Each step forward is as much a victory as the last. Writing to be proud of, Martie.

"Inhale the essence
of soft barbed wire
and unlock the door
to healing."

Claire

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
10 posted 2000-02-22 11:10 PM


I love imagery like this, and I admire those who can do it well.  Well done, Martie!


Corinne

January Flowers
Member
since 2000-02-01
Posts 209
South Carolina
11 posted 2000-02-22 11:15 PM


Martie~
This poetic ability of yours
is completely astounding!
You suck the readers right in
and have us "feeling" every word
with such emotion.
Great Poem!

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