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Passions in Poetry

Defeated

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hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


0 posted 02-20-2000 08:41 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

(I'm going to blame this one on 4 AM thoughts of an over stressed mind)

Defeated

Within this heart, the battleís ending
With walls and armor, Iím defending
And love, it be the cost
From these eyes, cold tears, Iím crying
You the Victor; I am dying
Iíve fought hard and lost

From your temple, I am falling
In the dark, your name, Iím calling
You donít seem to hear
And as the morningís fast approaching
Our love was once beyond reproaching
But now, the end is near

Our love was once beyond reproaching
And as the morningís fast approaching
In the dark, your name, Iím calling
While from your temple, I am falling
You the Victor; I am dying
From these eyes, cold tears, Iím crying
With walls and armor, Iím defending
But in this heart, the battleís ending

I call your name and you donít hear
Our love, it be the cost
With your silence, the end is near
Iíve fought hard, the battleís lost



†Have you ever noticed
That the words...
"Goodbye"
"I'm sorry"
"I love you"
Are so easy to pronounce
...Yet so hard to say
~Javan




[This message has been edited by hoot_owl_rn (edited 02-20-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 Ruth Kephart - All Rights Reserved
Meadowmuse
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since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


1 posted 02-20-2000 08:55 AM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

This is beautiful and sorrowful, Hoot Owl, and so aptly titled. I'm hoping you were not writing this from personal perspective, but from creative and poetic perception.  
HelmutB
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since 01-06-2000
Posts 989
Canada


2 posted 02-20-2000 08:57 AM       View Profile for HelmutB   Email HelmutB   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit HelmutB's Home Page   View IP for HelmutB

Well, I see nothing worng with the 4 am thing.
You seem to be very creative at 4 am because this is another piece of art you have done here. May you never be defeated. Beautiful poem Ruth. Shall I ring the alarm at 4 am tomorrow....
The stressed part, yes that can go.
Hugs and Love (and a Prayer for thee)


 The ability to describe life with words is similar to painting a picture; both can be powerful tools.

Lost Dreamer
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since 06-20-99
Posts 2589
Normal, Illinois


3 posted 02-20-2000 09:17 AM       View Profile for Lost Dreamer   Email Lost Dreamer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lost Dreamer

Ruth, I do believe this is one of your best poems yet, even though I think all your poems are excellent to say the least.
Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
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Hurricane Alley


4 posted 02-20-2000 09:31 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Excellent! But you need to get rid of the stress and sleep!
CMGrimm
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since 02-14-2000
Posts 700
USA


5 posted 02-20-2000 09:41 AM       View Profile for CMGrimm   Email CMGrimm   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for CMGrimm

A great friend of mine once told me
"to conquer, one must first understand the consequences of defeat, only then will you truly know what it is you are fighting for."

Ruth, you've brought tears to my eyes with this one, (as you so often do).  You paint a very sorrowful yet beautiful picture.

Very nicely done, ma'am.

Chris


 Never be a carbon copy of anybody...make your own impressions. - ANON.
Julie
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since 08-20-99
Posts 742
Houston, TX


6 posted 02-20-2000 09:46 AM       View Profile for Julie   Email Julie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Julie

Just lovely Hoot. I know I have felt this way. You put it so eloquently.
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


7 posted 02-20-2000 09:53 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Claire...I wish I could say it wasn't written from personal perspective, but I can't...thank you for your kind words  

Helmut...just remember, my body's used to being awake at four AM...thank you my dear friend  

Lost Dreamer...thank you and to think I almost didn't post it  

PDV...they may not appreciate me sleeping on the job   and the stress thing, well I'm trying...thank you  

Chris...thank you for the quote and for the lovely reply  

Julie...thank you  
Martie
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since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


8 posted 02-20-2000 10:52 AM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Ruth, you have voiced so beautifully the pain that is in your heart.  Wonderful poetry!
Dark Angel
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since 08-04-99
Posts 10270


9 posted 02-20-2000 02:39 PM       View Profile for Dark Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dark Angel

Ruth Honey, this is really beautiful, sad but beautiful. Excellent work Ruth!! *as always*  

 What comes from the heart goes to the heart.
Samuel Coleridge


WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


10 posted 02-20-2000 03:32 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Ruth once again you tear my eyes and pull my heart strings. Beautiful and sad. You are never defeated unless you give up. And you're just to strong to do that! My prayers are with you Ruth!

 <*\\\><

There's only two ways you can go...
One way you can save your riches,
And the other will save your soul.
Rich Mullins
Nan
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since 05-20-99
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11 posted 02-20-2000 03:45 PM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

So - Does that mean it's all gonna get better from here on out?? I think so... Rest, my friend... All will be well..
Shelley
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since 01-27-2000
Posts 269
Ohio, USA


12 posted 02-20-2000 03:53 PM       View Profile for Shelley   Email Shelley   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Shelley

I always enjoy reading your poems.
It's amazing what 4am can do with a creative mind. I like the way this is writen.
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


13 posted 02-21-2000 09:39 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Martie, DA, Whtdove, Shelly and Nan...thank you all so very much  
Denise
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since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


14 posted 02-21-2000 10:54 AM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Your stress has produced a work of art, Ruth. This is beautiful! Writing is one of the best outlets, I have found.  HUGS

Denise

Corazon
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since 02-02-2000
Posts 1301


15 posted 02-21-2000 12:33 PM       View Profile for Corazon   Email Corazon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corazon

no kidding denise a work of art is true...this poem is like breathing in a deep painful breath and then slowly breathing it out just the same.....nothing changes but it brings a small relief...like a sigh...great job
One Who Understands
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since 01-20-2000
Posts 252
Cedar Rapids, Iowa


16 posted 02-21-2000 11:59 PM       View Profile for One Who Understands   Email One Who Understands   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for One Who Understands

Always a pleasure to share your pain and struggles.
I know where you are coming from with the 4-in the morning thing
Janet Marie
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since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


17 posted 02-22-2000 12:08 AM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

this poem is Excellent...
very well written and expressed...
tragicly beautiful...
Isnt poeticly ironic that our best work comes in the late hours of the nite...but I'll take sweet inspiration when ever it comes...regardless of the hour
take care...janet marie

 I love you
Is all that you can't say-
Years gone by and still...
Words don't come easily
Like I love you, I love you...
But you can say baby...
Baby can I hold you tonight
Maybe if I told you the right words
At the right time you'd be mine...
Tracy Chapman


Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
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since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


18 posted 02-22-2000 12:58 AM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Ruth~
I just want to give you a
great big hug.
Be kind to yourself, lady.
Take it easy and know when
to say when.
Love to you.
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

nonsense
New Member
since 02-20-2000
Posts 8


19 posted 02-22-2000 03:01 AM       View Profile for nonsense   Email nonsense   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for nonsense

Very intense. I so have been there before, this really made me feel emotion in so many different areas.  Beautiful work.
Nichole
JamesMichael
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since 11-16-1999
Posts 31622
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA


20 posted 02-22-2000 06:15 AM       View Profile for JamesMichael   Email JamesMichael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JamesMichael

Hoot Owl I really like the line "from these eyes cold tears I'm crying.  Very beautiful writing.  I'm sorry you are hurting.  James
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 11-08-1999
Posts 9405
Pennsylvania


21 posted 02-22-2000 08:14 AM       View Profile for Elizabeth Santos   Email Elizabeth Santos   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Elizabeth Santos

Hoot,
This prooves my theory that the best poetry is written between 3 and 4 a.m. And this is among the best
Liz
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


22 posted 02-22-2000 10:24 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Thanks everyone...played with the rhythm and rhyme a bit on this one....I'm glad you enjoyed it, wasn't sure how it would be recieved  
Balladeer
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since 06-05-99
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Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


23 posted 02-22-2000 10:36 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Ruth, this is excellent writing  
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