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Passions in Poetry

Key To My Heart

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HafYue
New Member
since 02-19-2000
[First Post] 4


0 posted 02-19-2000 02:14 PM       View Profile for HafYue   Email HafYue   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for HafYue

I'd send You roses but they would wilt when they see you because your beauty surpasses their own
I'd Send You gold but the sparkle in your eyes would make gold seem like tin
I'd send You candy but your own sweetness would put them to shame
I'd send You a teddy bear but the the thought of your arms around anything but me sends shivers down my spine
All I have to Offer that won't rust, die or break is the Key to my heart.

© Copyright 2000 HafYue - All Rights Reserved
INclan
Senior Member
since 07-20-99
Posts 1046
Indiana, USA


1 posted 02-19-2000 05:51 PM       View Profile for INclan   Email INclan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for INclan

Welcome HafYue,

You have made a good first start.  It takes courage to publish your feeling. From your "Nick" and your construction, I have a question.  Is english your native language? If not, writing in a foriegn language is even tougher.  Keep writing.  I look forward to reading more.

INclan
Brent Hotchkin
Junior Member
since 02-15-2000
Posts 46
Florida,USA


2 posted 02-19-2000 06:34 PM       View Profile for Brent Hotchkin   Email Brent Hotchkin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Brent Hotchkin

Welcome Hafyue. I am pretty new myself though. I have only ben on a few days. You are going to like it here. Very nice poem. Looking forward to reading more of your work.
Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 12-26-1999
Posts 5512
Ontario, CANADA


3 posted 02-19-2000 06:35 PM       View Profile for Honeybee   Email Honeybee   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Honeybee

Hafyue:

     First let me say welcome and thanks for posting your poem here.  Your poem proves that less really is more, I really liked it, it is simple yet sweet.  It reminds me of the "my love is all I have to give you" phrase. My favourite line is "I'd send you a teddy bear but the thought of your arms around anything but me sends shivers down my spine." And of course, the last line sums it all up perfectly.  Good work for a first poem.

Take care,
Melissa Honeybee  
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