Sitting in Michael's Lap
My my -- looks like someone's thesaurus has been seeing heavy usage! LOL
Seriously, my friend, I did like this quite a bit, but I did have a few suggestions that might help to clarify the message ...
In lines four and 5, you speak of "murky depths/of cerulean pools ..." These two adjectives (murky and cerulean) seem to contradict one another; cerulean is in fact a vivid sky blue, a color which fits not at all with the concept of murkiness. Perhaps this was an intentional juxtaposition, but if not, I would consider eliminating either the one or the other.
In line 16, your usage of "aught" to mean "nothing," though it is technically correct (I know this cause I'm one of those people who reads dictionaries for fun -- LOL), it carries with it the connotation of the more common usage of "aught," which is "anything." This could throw the average reader off to some extent -- I'm ashamed to admit it, but it gave me pause until I realized that the word could be used as its own opposite.
OK, next: IMHO, ( ) you would do better in replacing "allusion" (line 23) with "illusion," or else change "of" to "to" (an allusion to ...), since allusion is a reference to something, not really a thing in itself.
Otherwise, this was an excellent piece (it sounds like such stuff and nonsense after I spent three paragraphs critiquing, doesn't it?). Truthfully, the "problems" I named were minor, and will be (if you choose to do so) easily corrected to yield a most original and eloquent poem.
Crossing my fingers and hoping we're still friends,
Full fathom five thy father lies,
Of his bones are coral made,
Those are pearls that were his eyes;
Nothing of him that doth fade
But doth suffer a sea-change
Into something rich and strange...
--William Shakespeare, from The Tempest
[This message has been edited by Skyfyre (edited 02-16-2000).]