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rain stones
| Open Poetry #6 |
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rain stones |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855
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-rain stones- i. rose quartz moonlight on the lake. leaves floating in puddles. petals floating distant. love seems to be in trouble. stars cast light in the sky, but none on the ground. i made love to her reflection, walked home alone, shut down. ii. agate The rain. Oh, oh. Oh the California rain. The rain, oh, oh, oh The California rain. Arcadia house seeped through with mud. That's okay. It's all okay. Fronds pulled to the ground from heavy wetness above. That's fine. All fine. Freeway accidents -- glass and lost purchase. Don't worry. Don't worry. Watered down drinks to forgive the nutureless. I'm fine. We're all fine. Staring at the California rain. Sepulveda overrun with puddles. Walking outside, I find in a sky spill A small stone, so smooth as to be clutchless. I try and try and try to lift it out on my finger. But it's too small, too quick, too furtive to linger. Then I realize it's just a piece of the pavement. Imaginary stone; imaginary engagement. iii. geodes So boring. So eleven months ago With moths hitting against the light outside. Her call to tell me we were through. It let me lock out the feelings inside. "Love?" in a box. "Lust?" out the window. "Faith?" chained in stocks. "Time?" another shadow. After the call ended, I pretended it'd all been planned. All the work of some above-the-clouds godman. Goddamn, turns out we're not the only pillar of salt. I'll toss you over my shoulder; not my fault. But the moths in insect rapidity Keep beating and burning themselves to pieces. I threw the phone as hard as I could into the nearest wall, And sunk down among lies' many reasons. (dialtone wheel smiling at me, speaker wire that made us both sin, phone cord coiled like a dead drowned snake -- what was the favorite color of our favorite stupid mistake?) iv. and to mud Unmade. Mislaid. Decayed. Not paid. Not fazed. Not glazed. Serenade. Stoic, staid. Broken notes. Locks asunder. Cinders and cinderella Both went under. buried thoughtless past. i'll make it, if i last. bodies groping. faces moping. time eloping. what is coping? ropes and gallows. rain's streaked shadows. tomorrow's callow, stones in shallows. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Stunning in its beauty, wrenching with emotion. Another yet, to print for that special book I keep. Loved the presentation, loved the rhythm that followed (or led) the feeling. I'm going to read this one over, and over, and over...) (I especially liked the imagery of the moths, but then I would, as one of my many favorite poems is "the lesson of the moth," by Don Marquis.) This one is a "keeper" for me. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I had to post again, friend. I can't believe this one is sliding by...perhaps it's just "so smooth as to be clutchless..." but again, I followed and did much enjoy. |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
There is so much emotion in this piece, very personal and bitter and effectively expressed. Overflowing with reflection and pain. Claire |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
serenity and Claire, Thanks for reading. I don't let it bother me that my poetry gets kinda lost in the deep end of Passions sometimes. This isn't my only forum for sharing my words; in fact, I'm doing an open mic tonight in Thousand Oaks. I'm not to everyone's taste, and that's fine with me.  Glad you liked it. Mike |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
p.s. serenity, I'm really touched that you're going to keep the poem in a special book of yours. Thanks! Mike and a final word -- I transcribed my poem wrong; it should say "leaves gathered" not "leaves floating." But either way is fine. See ya. |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
I agree with serenity...this is incredible.. |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
WOW! Wonderful poem! Absolutely wonderful! Denise |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I promise, this is my last word on the subject: "Here stands the mean, uncomely stone, 'Tis very cheap in price! The more it is despised by fools, The more loved by the wise." ---in translation, a Latin verse by the alchemist Arnuldus de Villanova |
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Saxoness
since 1999-07-18
Posts 1102Texas |
Now this......is truly art. Took my breath away, it did. Bravo! "Glory remains unaware of my neglected dwelling where alone I sing my tearful song which has charms only for me." -Charles Brugnot |
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CMGrimm Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685USA |
WOW...what more can I say. I usually don't get that involved in the "deep end" but this piece really is one of the most beautiful I've read. I have to say, maybe I should look a little deeper into my soul and see if maybe there is a little artist in myself trying to get out. Haha. anyway, thanks for sharing this, I really enjoyed it and will be looking for you in the future. Chris |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Jeez, I'm getting lax in replying to my replies. (at least I'm not lax about replying to the replies of my replied replies' replies; I doubt that will ever happen) Corazon, Thanks. Makes me embarrassed to admit I kinda just threw this together as I went along. Denise, Thank you. serenity, Nonsense, speak all you want. And how did you come up with that verse in relation to my poem so quickly? I must know the secret! Saxoness, Wow, thanks. Now I'm starting to feel guilty that I didn't really set out to make this such a ... work of art, I guess. It must be true: that you can only ever achieve greatness when you don't aspire to. CMG, And thank you for reading. Glad you enjoyed, and glad I got you thinking. Don't go out too deep, though! Mike |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Mike~ I'm simply taken away with this work. It isn't often that I find myself at a loss for what to say. My first reaction was to be grasped by the images and the easy way it appears that they flowed out of your head. Other than that ... I'm just plain downright impressed. I would like to print it out and share it with a friend tomorrow. I think perhaps you two went to the same brain surgeon ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Marge, Feel free to print out as many copies as you like. Glad you enjoyed it so much. And I never had brain surgery -- just eye surgery, and, of course, the surgery of cutting myself out of a pretty chaotic past by moving to California. Best darn thing I coulda done, too; I wouldn't of had "Sepulveda" in there otherwise. Mike |
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