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Passions in Poetry

The Calm

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Mike
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since 06-19-99
Posts 2528


0 posted 02-12-2000 06:58 PM       View Profile for Mike   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Mike


Luna's orb in silence creeps,
...across night's cloudless sky,
Past the starry sentinels,
...Orion's muted cry,
Solemn silence cloaks the land,
...nature in repose,
Summer breeze in noiseless hush,
...upon the earth bestows,
Eternal benediction,
...on man and beast as one,
Immortal absolution,
...as final day is done.
© Copyright 2000 Mike - All Rights Reserved
doreen peri
Member Rara Avis
since 05-25-99
Posts 8028
Virginia


1 posted 02-12-2000 07:42 PM       View Profile for doreen peri   Email doreen peri   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for doreen peri

Mike, this is wonderful in both syntax and feeling... you truly have a gift of words. I've seen you use this same type of structure before, with every other line starting with "...". I'm not familiar with many classic poetry structure; does this fall into some certain catagory? Just curious. Doesn't really matter when it comes down to it. It's lovely. Thought you might know something I could learn, that's all. Excellent work, my friend.

-dp
Rex Allen McCoy
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since 01-30-2000
Posts 2636
Sippin a Timmy's in London


2 posted 02-12-2000 07:47 PM       View Profile for Rex Allen McCoy   Email Rex Allen McCoy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Rex Allen McCoy's Home Page   View IP for Rex Allen McCoy

forces one to stop and think
I like it

Rex}<{{{{o>
Poet deVine
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Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


3 posted 02-12-2000 09:31 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

You know, this did make me calm! Lovely, lovely poem. But then, all your work is... thank you, I needed this today.  
Martie
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since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


4 posted 02-12-2000 09:34 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Words of firmament emerge
...in poetic mastery.

I think you like the night, Mike.  You write so often of it, and so well.
christies heart
Member
since 08-10-99
Posts 192
NJ, USA


5 posted 02-12-2000 09:39 PM       View Profile for christies heart   Email christies heart   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for christies heart

This is so well done...is it supposed to make me feel sad? It did in that reflective way. I love it.
Alwye
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since 06-16-99
Posts 3968
In the space between moments


6 posted 02-12-2000 10:17 PM       View Profile for Alwye   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alwye

So beautiful...this is definitely poetic mastery...lovely work.  

 *Krista Knutson*

One lives in the hope of becoming a memory.
~*Antonio Porchia*~
Mike
Member Elite
since 06-19-99
Posts 2528


7 posted 02-13-2000 08:02 AM       View Profile for Mike   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mike

Thank you all kindly for the comments.
Doreen, I know very little if anything about
poetic structure. Wouldn't know iambic from prehistoric.  I write solely from feel and my ... justs feels right to me.  *smile*
Martie, probably shouldn't say this, or I might get committed, but when I was young, I would sneak outside in the middle of the night and lay on my back and stare at the stars for hours.  Yes, I enjoy the night.
Ted Reynolds
Member
since 12-15-1999
Posts 335


8 posted 02-13-2000 09:28 AM       View Profile for Ted Reynolds   Email Ted Reynolds   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Ted Reynolds

Well, Mike, it reads like you still do lie out under the stars, and that's nothing for a poet to be ashamed of.  I do sometimes, but not tonight, there's a foot of snow.

The word "final" in the last line, taken literally, adds an almost scary/holy new meaning to the poem.  Intended?
Tasi
Junior Member
since 02-08-2000
Posts 42
Canada


9 posted 02-13-2000 10:47 AM       View Profile for Tasi   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Tasi

Mike I feel a need to go and lie out underneath the stars  
I could almost hear the crickets chirping if not for all the snow...great work
Tasi
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


10 posted 02-13-2000 11:17 AM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Oh, Mike-
With my fascination for the night skies,
this one took my breath away.
I do the same as you, for hours looking
to see 'beyond'.
I'm never disappointed with the view.
This will become one of my favorites
for sure.
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


11 posted 02-13-2000 12:14 PM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

Mike, in these few brief and beautiful lines you have so tenderly encompassed what most of us spend our lifetimes trying to describe, and I am in complete awe of the reverence this poem evokes. I've never read finer work.

Claire
Nan
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Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


12 posted 02-13-2000 02:34 PM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

Splendiferous..

Mike
Member Elite
since 06-19-99
Posts 2528


13 posted 02-13-2000 08:36 PM       View Profile for Mike   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mike

Thank you very much for the comments.  Coming from such gifted poets, I am humbled.
Denise
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since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


14 posted 02-13-2000 09:35 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Perfect title for this one, Mike! This piece exudes calmness (is that a word?) Very beautiful!

Denise
freckles
Member
since 02-12-2000
Posts 161
Virginia USA


15 posted 02-14-2000 07:42 PM       View Profile for freckles   Email freckles   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for freckles

Beautiful work, Mike.  I hope to see more of your poetry as I have more time to come here.
Gemini
Senior Member
since 12-15-1999
Posts 1223
Wisconsin, USA


16 posted 02-15-2000 11:46 PM       View Profile for Gemini   Email Gemini   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Gemini

Mike, you paint a lovely sky. If it weren't so cloudy tonight, I'd be looking up right now.
CMGrimm
Senior Member
since 02-14-2000
Posts 700
USA


17 posted 02-15-2000 11:58 PM       View Profile for CMGrimm   Email CMGrimm   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for CMGrimm

Wow...so many people. All gifted in the art of words. All with the same splendid fascination with the heavens above.

"It's a small world afterall"

Hey Mike, does Orion look the same from your place as it does from my back porch?

Always wondered....just thought I'd ask.

Splendid poem Mike, absolutely wonderful.
Will be looking for your posts in the future.

Thanks
Chris
 
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