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Passions in Poetry

Filling in the Feeling

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Chris Goodman
Member
since 01-28-2000
Posts 95
Issaquah, Washington usa


0 posted 02-12-2000 03:51 PM       View Profile for Chris Goodman   Email Chris Goodman   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Chris Goodman

Coloring her friends with gold and purple
I can see her from the side of my eye
As she colors about nothing for a very long time
I could color with her if I had such desire, but my heart is in black and white and not color.

She insists to be seen and heard and touched
Sometimes it seems she wants so much
Too much time, energy and breathing
Anxiety
Looms over
It is beaming

This is what I wanted
At 19 I flurried
I made this choice in such a hurry

It is this selfish behavior that
Runs through blood
Arrogance and vanity
Haunt my motherhood.

I scream alone in my whirlpool self created
Sitting in pity is about self-hatred
Hatred for feeling the way that I do
Lying inside about the truth

She turns to show me the picture
She has colored
I say, “what a beautiful and lovely little girl.”



 Blue Moon




[This message has been edited by Chris Goodman (edited 02-12-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 Chris Goodman - All Rights Reserved
INclan
Senior Member
since 07-20-99
Posts 1046
Indiana, USA


1 posted 02-12-2000 05:05 PM       View Profile for INclan   Email INclan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for INclan

Might the feeling be selfish self-pity.  
Chris Goodman
Member
since 01-28-2000
Posts 95
Issaquah, Washington usa


2 posted 02-12-2000 05:10 PM       View Profile for Chris Goodman   Email Chris Goodman   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Chris Goodman

I am not sure the feeling would be called
"Selfish Self Pity"; however my friend struggles to find motherhood .  I look at my own daughter and feel blessed beyond words.

Chris

 Blue Moon
INclan
Senior Member
since 07-20-99
Posts 1046
Indiana, USA


3 posted 02-12-2000 05:52 PM       View Profile for INclan   Email INclan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for INclan

I grieve for your friend.  I too, am bless by my 4 kids.  Thanx for posting this thought provoking piece.
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