los banos, ca,
I can not say a word to you,
As memories flood back,
To many scares still remain,
And you show no remorce for that.
I will not choose to hate you,
As completley as I feel,
After all the pain you caused,
My love to you will remian sealed.
I may never understand your reasons,
For they were not offered to me,
A loving wife that you contianed,
Still in my bed you chose to be.
I can never glance into your eyes,
While you say I misunderstood,
I remember his hands, his eyes,
There is no way that I could.
I've let this break tear my world apart,
For so many nights on end,
But I can never change the past,
And refuse to make ammends.
You took away the fragile years,
When I shoud have learned to trust,
And it breaks my lovers heart to know,
That you put me through so much.
How can I forgive you?
Even if it is for me?
You may have forgotten long ago,
But I'm still jsut sixteen.
How can I force back a pain?
That makes me ashamed of my life?
You cant change the digust I feel,
Even though I know it isnt right.
"Daddy" do you ever cry late at night,
Wishing the hands of time,
Could make your soul alright?
Have you ever hung your head in shame,
Of the image someone else created,
Do you realize for all of that,
You'll always be the one to blame?
Only after trying so hard to let go, did i realize how much i wanted to hold you forever> Amber and Ellis forever and always
[This message has been edited by amber (edited 02-12-2000).]