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Open Poetry #6
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A moment before nothing...
| Open Poetry #6 |
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A moment before nothing... |
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Breathe~ Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 315Washington... |
Kneeling my body drawn down weighted by a sickened spirit broken one too many times Despairs arms beckoning promised relief Eagerly I crawl through the shells of my dreams Trampling their corpses further to wallow in her cold embrace Hugging my knees in comfort I am safe in my cocoon sheltered by empty thoughts Pleasantly numb to things that once mattered I watch them now with deadened eyes Wolves in human masks tug hungrily at my heart basket anxious to devour the contents Disjointed faces croon of my failures laughing as I sit in the dust of my dreams I ignore them sliding towards the darkness my walls thickening against normality impenetrable comfort Depression whispers softly until I hear nothing see nothing I am nothing…. Freedom of expression is the watch word... |
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| © Copyright 2000 Denise Blackwell - All Rights Reserved | |||
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White Wolf Member
since 1999-09-18
Posts 371Somewhere in the vast wasteland |
Wow. I have been there before..until someone came and yanked me out of my shell. Nicely done. You have captured the feeling well, atleast of what I remember of it. You write well keep it up. I look forward to reading more of your stuff.< !signature--> Â Poet: An individual that can transfer what is in the heart onto paper. [This message has been edited by Scorched Dragon (edited 02-09-2000).] |
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dash rendor Junior Member
since 2000-01-30
Posts 21 |
I only read your poem because you didnt have any responses, but im extremely glad i did. This poem reeks with dispair, but it embodies the true emotions that such dispair envokes. I hate to wonder what could cause such dispair. Hopefully you only write about these things and dont truly experience them. I enjoyed this poem and i will definitly look for others by you. |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
The title intrigued me...the writing impressed. You've got some very potent imagery here. I'm looking forward to reading more from you! Claire |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Breathe~ After the moments of despair ... H O P E. Very well-drawn images of the depth of despair. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Breathe~ Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 315Washington... |
Scorched Dragon...sometimes we have to hit bottom before rising...Thank you for your words... dash...Well I am extremely glad that you did! Let's just say that I am no longer in that state of mind...thanks to amazing people around me...this poem is just a rtoken reminder I haul out when I feel myself slipping...thanks for stopping in...  )Meadowmuse...Thank you! I hope you DO read more... )Marge...Marge...Marge...*smiling* Hope can take us anywhere...if we let it...thank you so much!...You are such a kind lady... )Freedom of expression is the watch word... |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
Wow, you captured the essence of the nether side so well, been there, too often, so glad to be away from all of the "wolves in human masks" now, they only reside in that dark little place...great poem |
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Breathe~ Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 315Washington... |
Thank you BSC...I am very happy to say I haven't seen one of those wolves in a long time...*smiling* Freedom of expression is the watch word... |
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HelmutB Senior Member
since 2000-01-06
Posts 964Canada |
There is always a light up on the horizon A well done poem  Now do write one that reflects you today Very nice very deep The ability to describe life with words is similar to painting a picture; both can be powerful tools. |
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Breathe~ Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 315Washington... |
HelmutB... Awwwww...I don't wanna!!!...*grin* Well...I don't seem to express love as well..and I don't know why...but I did just recently do something concerning passion....would that do? )Freedom of expression is the watch word... |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Breathe... deeply... this is so deep - I enjoyed it, and I hated it. I loved it, and I hated it some more. This is a deeply moving poem. Well done. |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
yep, can ditto lja on this one...have been there...so I understand...very well written |
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Breathe~ Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 315Washington... |
LngJhn...You know? I love and hate this poem too...I hate how low I was at the time that I wrote it...but I also love how it also reminds me of how far we can come... )Corazon...and may we never go back there again! ) Thank you...Freedom of expression is the watch word... |
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WilliamHugh Junior Member
since 2000-02-10
Posts 12MA |
Great work, everyone can relate this to some point in their life. |
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Breathe~ Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 315Washington... |
More often then I care to admit... )Thanks William... Freedom of expression is the watch word... |
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bobbycat Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 233USA |
LOVED the imagery!!!! You can describe things and feelings perfectly....I'll bet you're GREAT at giving directions!!!! LOL  Bobbycat =^..^= |
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Breathe~ Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 315Washington... |
Acccck! Uh...No comment! *LOL* Thanks bobbycat... )Freedom of expression is the watch word... |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
"I crawl through the shells of my dreams"... Very good line (and a good poem), Breathe... |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Breathe~ I find myself looking for your poetry. This is a bad memory revisited for me.Love-hate yep,I loved it because it is so good, and hated it for reminding me of something I'd rather forget. Great job! -SEA |
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