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Open Poetry #6
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bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855


0 posted 2000-02-07 02:12 AM


Another from head to screen moment. Slowly.

Mike

-you tell me where to sign-
I watch the clock's hands slowly move the air.
This time last year, mine would have been in your hair.
But snap snap snap, we broke away, faux care.
And though I feel uncourageous,
I'm not going naked, foolish, bare.

There's books on the shelves under the shadow of the clock.
Sometimes I still hear your voice, though we no longer talk.
And when the phone rings, I watch it till it stops.
Sometimes it rains, big fat ground-hungry drops.

Sometimes I can't taste the drink set on the edge.
Sometimes I can taste snow and rocks; like jumping off a ledge.
But more often than not, I'm happy to be alive.
There's something glowing hot, something of me inside.

Throw some more water on the coals.
Orange light, steam and smoke through holes.
Pine forest ignores the man perched on the ring.
Dirt at his feet, but you better believe he still has the voice to sing.

Somebody needs to give him a place to stand.
Somebody needs to move the shadows,
Walk up and hold his hand.
Just show him where to sign, oh happy day.
Then watch him throw it in the fire,
Watch it burn away.

He will smile, and he will walk on.
Embers thrown to the dusk, smoke floated to the dawn.
He doesn't need a paper to sign, to fit in.
He'd rather find himself before someone else again.

© Copyright 2000 MPC - All Rights Reserved
devina
Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539
Cali
1 posted 2000-02-07 02:41 AM


I'm glad you ended this the way you did...find yourself before you find someone else!!! Just lovely!!

 Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
2 posted 2000-02-07 07:26 AM


Mike-
I feel that you dug deep and came
up with words of wisdom.
There is some vivid imagery
scattered in this piece.

'Sometimes it rains, big fat ground-hungry drops.'

'Orange light, steam and smoke
through holes.'

Wonderful !
~*Marge*~





 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com



Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

3 posted 2000-02-07 09:09 AM


Mike, this h2s moment is ripe with self~awareness and resolution, with special attention to detail, which is a facet of your writing that I enjoy most. I really like this piece and how you let it develop.

Claire

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
4 posted 2000-02-07 09:44 AM


Mike, this was really good!I loved the last line- excellent.-SEA
Corazon
Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209

5 posted 2000-02-07 11:52 AM


I can't beieve how your poems touch me....haven't read one yet that I didn't really really like, this is great!
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
6 posted 2000-02-07 12:00 PM


Consumed my mind up the very last word. Very descriptive and captivating.
Liz

Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 1999-09-17
Posts 1495
Canyon Country, CA
7 posted 2000-02-07 06:04 PM


Absolutely wonderful!

 Just be glad I'm not your child! *evil grin*


bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

8 posted 2000-02-08 01:28 AM


devina,
glad you enjoyed it. As Valentine's Day draws nearer, I'm willing myself happiness -- to take strength in who I am, how far I've come, and truly, truly do my best at finding out who I am before I get significantly involved with anyone again.

Marge,
Thank you. I'm glad my writing gives you phrases to savor like that. That's when I know I'm doing all right.

Claire,
Always glad you're reading, and enjoying.

SEA,
Thank you. Maybe I'll visit Eureka yet.  

Corazon,
Wow, thanks. I'm always my own worst critic, so I'll take your word for it. I'm glad I've been able to touch your mind, give you things to think about.

Liz,
Glad you liked.  

Echo Rayne,
Thank you very much.

Mike

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