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Passions in Poetry

Nice Guys Finish Last... (re: Nice Guys by Mistikman)

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poetry_kills
Senior Member
since 12-04-1999
Posts 552
new orleans


0 posted 02-07-2000 01:27 AM       View Profile for poetry_kills   Email poetry_kills   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit poetry_kills's Home Page   View IP for poetry_kills

this poem is partially inspired by, partially a response to, and partially a message of hope for Mistikman's poem "Nice Guys"...

Nice Guys Finish Last (But Never Least)

She said "If only I could meet a nice guy like you."
As she cried on my shoulder -- a sad tale, yet true.
And tomorrow she'll be dating Johnny quarterback
And he'll break her heart, sending her tearfully back
To one who's so close, yet feeling so far away
From the love I desire and the words I can't say
And as the tears fall from her love-blinded eyes
My heart gently heaves with tormenting sighs
With resignation I release her of my passions
Seeking love's hand in a different fashion
I vow to myself to ne'er again speak of Cupid
Until his sweet arrows strike both me and my beloved
And so I wait with love's bright flames yet unlit
Keeping my heart safe from those who would take it
'Til I finally met someone who made the connection
As I sat there silently craving her affection


there is still hope for love,
jerome the boy with no brain




 A savage place! as holy and enchanted
As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted
By woman wailing for her demon-lover!
~Coleridge


© Copyright 2000 Jerome Solomon - All Rights Reserved
Breathe~
Member
since 02-05-2000
Posts 319
Washington...


1 posted 02-07-2000 01:43 AM       View Profile for Breathe~   Email Breathe~   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Breathe~

Boy with no brain??  I beg to differ!!

This is a wonderful piece!

So sad when the one we admire...does not feel the same in return...but it happens more than we like...and you caught the moment perfectly..

you day will come... )


 Freedom of expression is the watch word...
devina
Member Elite
since 10-28-1999
Posts 3189
Northern Cali


2 posted 02-07-2000 01:44 AM       View Profile for devina   Email devina   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for devina

This was a great way to reply to his poem...in my opinion, as us girls get older, only then do we actually seek to find love...and nice guys as you put it...till then you guys should wait patiently cuz in the end, you'll get the girl!!!!

 Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...
Mistikman
Senior Member
since 01-10-2000
Posts 729
San Jose, CA, USA


3 posted 02-07-2000 02:27 AM       View Profile for Mistikman   Email Mistikman   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mistikman

*CLAP* *CLAP* *CLAP* Bravo! Thank you for the phenominal reponse Jerome, I loved it. You have a wonderful way with words, and this is one of the best I have read from you. I did not leave the teen forum, I only posted here because my poem was in response to another forum.

 I am not a poet, I am merely one who speaks in emotion
poetry_kills
Senior Member
since 12-04-1999
Posts 552
new orleans


4 posted 02-07-2000 02:50 AM       View Profile for poetry_kills   Email poetry_kills   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit poetry_kills's Home Page   View IP for poetry_kills

breathe: "boy with no brain" is my patented signature... "jerome" is just too common *heh*... thank you for your kind response though  

devina: thank you for the advice, but you see, i've already found my soul-mate... (the last two lines were meant to hint at that)   the guy in the poem gives up on the girl that wont see him for what he truly is and ends up meeting another wonderful girl by chance... one that appreciates him   ... that's how i tie the poem in with personal experience...

mistikman: *heh* you're more than welcome for the response... i just didn't want you thinking ALL girls were like that... i managed to find the perfect one for me (and i found her when i finally stopped looking for her)... take heart with what devina and breathe said and apply it to yourself... you'll find her someday...
oh yes, and i didn't actually think you were leaving the teen forum (at least i hope you wont)... i was just being all sentimental for no reason at all *heh*...

sincerely,
jerome the boy with no brain

 A savage place! as holy and enchanted
As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted
By woman wailing for her demon-lover!
~Coleridge


White Wolf
Member
since 09-18-99
Posts 384
Somewhere in the vast wastelan


5 posted 02-07-2000 05:00 AM       View Profile for White Wolf   Email White Wolf   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for White Wolf

The memories this poem brings back.  I had a female like this once.  But it was 5 years until I actually got to date her for 2 months.  Those were the best of my life.  But I made a mistake and may never have her back.  Well written.  You captured the feelings well.

 "Life's greatest mystery isn't the meaning of life. To love and be loved is the meaning of life. Now how to attain those is the greatest mystery of all."

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


6 posted 02-07-2000 10:22 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Nice guys don't always finish last  
SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
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Member Seraphic
since 01-18-2000
Posts 24152
with you


7 posted 02-07-2000 02:03 PM       View Profile for SEA   Email SEA   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SEA

PK, ya know, it occurs to me that us nice girls got left out, do guys have any idea what it's like for us to fall for a guy, but because we are not "easy" they won't give us the time of day? It really does go both ways. I was a Good Girl. I was always passed over until the guys realized they didn't want a woman that had been passed around. -SEA
PREACH
Junior Member
since 02-07-2000
Posts 20


8 posted 02-07-2000 02:30 PM       View Profile for PREACH   Email PREACH   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for PREACH

THIS POEM IS TALKING STRIGHT FROM MY HEART, WHICH IS PRETTY WIERD. HEY, HOW DID YOU DO THAT. NAW, JUST KIDDING BUT I HAVEN'T READ THE OTHER POEM BUT THIS ONE IS ABSOLUTELY GREAT KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.

PREACH
bobbycat
Member
since 02-06-2000
Posts 235
USA


9 posted 02-07-2000 02:48 PM       View Profile for bobbycat   Email bobbycat   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for bobbycat

Very good response poem!  I loved it!  

Bobbycat =^..^=
Cuddlez
Member
since 11-27-1999
Posts 434
Walla Walla, WA 99362


10 posted 02-07-2000 05:34 PM       View Profile for Cuddlez   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Cuddlez

What a great poem. Shows sometimes that what you want isnt what you get. The QB is nice for awhile but, if they follow the stereotype get old quick. Glad it worked out in the end..... Now if only I could meet a nice guy ) He he I did....

 Time flies? Say it not so, time stays we go.
poetry_kills
Senior Member
since 12-04-1999
Posts 552
new orleans


11 posted 02-07-2000 06:30 PM       View Profile for poetry_kills   Email poetry_kills   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit poetry_kills's Home Page   View IP for poetry_kills

scorched dragon: i'm sorry to hear about your loss... i hope i didn't cause too many unhappy memories...

hoot_owl: i know they dont, but often times they do... i just wanted to write a poem that pointed out the fact that even though they may "finish last" they never finish "least"... in other words, nice guys generally end up with girls better suited for them  

sea: i apologize for making you feel left out ^_^*... my idea came from mistikman's poem that dealt with nice GUYS and his poem came from the philosophy 101 topic about the same subject from the male perspective... i do realize that many girls often suffer the same fate... my poem is more about the idea of how both "nice guys" and "nice girls" need to stop drooling over the jocks and beauty queens and find someone worthy of their sincere hearts... in my poem, the guy learns this, the girl doesn't... and the girl ends up losing the "nice guy" she claimed to want so badly to another girl who understood what she needed and wanted in a guy... mabye that's no excuse, but i hope it's a least a little in my defense...

preach: well, actually this poem is about a common teenage sentiment... one that i, thankfully, never had to experience... i always swooned over the nice, shy girls... but myself being too shy to talk to them *heh*... it never worked out very well...

bobbycat: thank you  

cuddlez: thank you for your kind response, and i'm glad you've found someone worthy of yourself  

sincerely,
jerome the boy with no brain

 A savage place! as holy and enchanted
As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted
By woman wailing for her demon-lover!
~Coleridge


Mistikman
Senior Member
since 01-10-2000
Posts 729
San Jose, CA, USA


12 posted 02-07-2000 06:37 PM       View Profile for Mistikman   Email Mistikman   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mistikman

Well, I know what you are saying about the nice shy girls, Jerome. Theres just something about the loud energetic girls that makes me not want to waste my time. I am a nurturer by nature, so when I see the quiet girl in the corner, something just makes me want to know her and understand her. Kinda wierd I guess. The girl I am trying to win the affection of is one of the quiet girls  

 I am not a poet, I am merely one who speaks in emotion
White Wolf
Member
since 09-18-99
Posts 384
Somewhere in the vast wastelan


13 posted 02-08-2000 03:31 AM       View Profile for White Wolf   Email White Wolf   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for White Wolf

Actually I only have the fondest of memories of that time.  So you have brought back the best of my memories.  Thank you.

 "Life's greatest mystery isn't the meaning of life. To love and be loved is the meaning of life. Now how to attain those is the greatest mystery of all."

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 08-02-99
Posts 9130
Purgatorial Incarceration


14 posted 02-08-2000 04:15 AM       View Profile for Christopher   Email Christopher   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Christopher

Great job on the poem-jerome. Truly there is hope!

And~To add a smart-aleky remark:

If nice guys finish last, then why aren't I in first place???
Michael
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 08-13-99
Posts 6333
California


15 posted 02-08-2000 04:21 AM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

Thanks P_K for the message of hope...LOL  Good poem.

Michael

Oh, and Chris, you are in first - you're just looking the wrong direction again.
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


16 posted 02-08-2000 08:01 AM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

But....but....I'm a damn nice guy...???? And I don't finish last?....Hell, I rarely finish anything I start?...But this is a great poem and those "Johnny Quarterbacks" are all a bunch of losers anyhow?....Get a Toerag, the epitomy of nice....or of something.....
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


17 posted 02-08-2000 08:38 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Excellent poem. Great response too.  
tori
Senior Member
since 06-18-99
Posts 521
Mechanicsville, Maryland, USA


18 posted 02-08-2000 09:14 AM       View Profile for tori   Email tori   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit tori's Home Page   View IP for tori

Very well done I enjoyed this much...

 If with pen in hand I've made you think
I've not wasted one drop of ink
Vlh.
visit my site~ http://www.hsanet.net/user/dkm/hellomy.htm
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


19 posted 02-08-2000 10:37 AM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Jerome this was great! I really enjoyed this!

LOL @ Micahel, he's right Chris!
LOL@ you too Toe!

 <*\\\><

When you can't make up your mind
Which way is right for you,
Stop and softly ask yourself,
What Would Jesus Do?
Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 09-17-99
Posts 1538
Canyon Country, CA


20 posted 02-08-2000 12:49 PM       View Profile for Echo Rhayne   Email Echo Rhayne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Echo Rhayne

Great response!  All I have to say is that not all nice guys finish last *grin*  oh ooooops sorry anyways hehe great poem!

 Just be glad I'm not your child! *evil grin*

poetry_kills
Senior Member
since 12-04-1999
Posts 552
new orleans


21 posted 02-08-2000 01:13 PM       View Profile for poetry_kills   Email poetry_kills   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit poetry_kills's Home Page   View IP for poetry_kills

thank you all for your kind responses... *heh* i think this is the most attention any of my poems has every drawn... (it would have to be the one i wrote in a 5 minute spur-of-the-moment daze)... thank you again

sincerely,
jerome the mysterious priest

 A savage place! as holy and enchanted
As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted
By woman wailing for her demon-lover!
~Coleridge


 
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