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Passions in Poetry

The First Time

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Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 11-08-1999
Posts 9405
Pennsylvania


0 posted 02-01-2000 08:10 AM       View Profile for Elizabeth Santos   Email Elizabeth Santos   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Elizabeth Santos

The First Time

The first time that I knew your name
Was like a song I'd never heard
And soon the melody became
The sound of every singing bird

The first time that I saw your face
My eyes were bathed in sheer delight
And saw your image in the still
Of every corner of the night

The first time that I heard your voice
The sound then settled in my ear
And muffled every single tone
Of every word I was to hear

The first time that your lips touched mine
The earth revolved around my bliss
And held me captive to it's touch
And taught my spirit how to kiss

The first time that we bathed together
In the stardust of the night
The sky looked down and blessed our love
And moon carressed us with it's light

The shadows danced upon the flesh
The moon defined the form of you
And every breath consumed the scent
Of drops of honeysuckle's dew

The ever pounding of my heart
And splendor of the earth and sky
Were all contained within a teardrop
From the fountain of my eye

Elizabeth Santos
© Copyright 2000 Elizabeth Santos - All Rights Reserved
Marilyn
Member Elite
since 09-26-1999
Posts 2646
Ontario, Canada


1 posted 02-01-2000 09:36 AM       View Profile for Marilyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marilyn

Well done Liz! This is excellent. It flowed beautifully, until the second last line.

Were all contained within a teardrop
From the fountain of my eye

May I suggest:

Were all contained within a drop
From the fountain of my eye

It would just even out the flow of the last 2 lines.

Well done my friend. *G*
PoeticKnight
Senior Member
since 01-20-2000
Posts 1151
New Orleans, LA


2 posted 02-01-2000 09:57 AM       View Profile for PoeticKnight   Email PoeticKnight   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for PoeticKnight

This poem was great. I like how it started each verse with a "first". Very real and sensual. My kind of poem.

J
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


3 posted 02-01-2000 10:01 AM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

I think this is the most beautiful poem of yours that I have ever read, Elizabeth. You just keep outdoing yourself every time you write!! BRAVO *clapping*                    
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


4 posted 02-01-2000 10:12 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Oh...now thanks to you, I'll be singing the song all day today...lol..."The first time, ever I saw your face"
This is lovely Liz...but you really do have me singing here...and if you ever heard me sing, you'd know that's not a good thing
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 07-07-99
Posts 32119
Tamarac Fla


5 posted 02-01-2000 10:32 AM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

Elizabeth,
Elegance personified, there are no other words. Love Sy
Parker
Member Elite
since 01-06-2000
Posts 3135
... the old black rum


6 posted 02-01-2000 10:59 AM       View Profile for Parker   Email Parker   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Parker's Home Page   View IP for Parker

Liz, absolutly lovely, you have a very sweet way of writing.

Parker
Safwan Arekat
Junior Member
since 01-29-2000
Posts 38
Bahrain


7 posted 02-01-2000 11:19 AM       View Profile for Safwan Arekat   Email Safwan Arekat   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Safwan Arekat's Home Page   View IP for Safwan Arekat

Liz,

Very beautiful poem. How few of us indeed who do not REMEMBER that First Time ! I understand from all the comments you're getting that you're stepping through a threshold. I wish you the best.


Safwan
Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 11-23-1999
Posts 15611
Lansing, MI USA


8 posted 02-01-2000 12:40 PM       View Profile for Sven   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sven

Wonderful as always Elizabeth. . . even more so now that I'm going through that "First time" again. . .

Beautiful words my friend. . .

---------------------------------------------

 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


9 posted 02-01-2000 01:57 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

I am singing with Ruth, Liz.  This is eloquent romance and a sensual delight.  Just Lovely!!!
John Yaws
Senior Member
since 10-09-1999
Posts 865
Texas


10 posted 02-01-2000 02:18 PM       View Profile for John Yaws   Email John Yaws   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit John Yaws's Home Page   View IP for John Yaws

Exquisite, milady. Now I know what some of the commenters mean when they say, "If only it were written to me".
Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


11 posted 02-01-2000 02:20 PM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

Beautiful, Liz.

Claire
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


12 posted 02-01-2000 02:57 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

I, too, will be humming with you all day long, Liz!  

 Sunshine
Look, then, into thine heart, and write ~~~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow


Nate Dogg
Senior Member
since 11-15-1999
Posts 1691
Georgia, Fulton


13 posted 02-01-2000 04:02 PM       View Profile for Nate Dogg   Email Nate Dogg   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nate Dogg's Home Page   View IP for Nate Dogg

Wow, Liz! I swear that you have some of most beautiful rhymes I ever read.

 Nathan
RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


14 posted 02-01-2000 04:31 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Elizabeth: I'm joining Hoot and Roberta Flack...excellent poem..

HUSG



 Memories give you the power to collect roses in the winter...
LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 07-23-99
Posts 3654
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion


15 posted 02-01-2000 04:35 PM       View Profile for LngJhnAg   Email LngJhnAg   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LngJhnAg

ohhh, geez, Liz - now you've got Hoot singing... AGAIN!  I've had to turn off my PC speakers just to read the rest of the posts.

As for your poem - exquisite!
Gene
Senior Member
since 01-23-2000
Posts 940
Colorado, USA


16 posted 02-01-2000 04:43 PM       View Profile for Gene   Email Gene   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Gene's Home Page   View IP for Gene

Liz,

You left one out--"The first time that I read your poems."

The first time that I read your poems,
Something about them, took to home.
I knew I would desire more,
This one's no exception--that's for sure.


~Gene  
  
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 11-08-1999
Posts 9405
Pennsylvania


17 posted 02-01-2000 05:47 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth Santos   Email Elizabeth Santos   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Elizabeth Santos

I have read each and every one of your responses with much appreciation and to the men who responded, your comments were so sweet.And thanks, Gene for the little poem
Thank you all very much
LIz
Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 08-02-99
Posts 9130
Purgatorial Incarceration


18 posted 02-01-2000 06:25 PM       View Profile for Christopher   Email Christopher   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Christopher

Liz, though I hate to do it, I have to ditto Gunslinger. There aren't many verses that reach out and grab you by the heart... this is one.
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


19 posted 02-01-2000 08:04 PM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Elizabeth, my romantic friend-

This poem is the just the prettiest.
I join the gals in singing !
One of the prettiest poems I've
seen flow from your pen.

Your sweet words are so appealing.
Tony Santos is a very lucky man !
~*Marge*~




 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

 
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