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Passions in Poetry

something and something else

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bsquirrel
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Member Rara Avis
since 01-03-2000
Posts 8382


0 posted 01-28-2000 12:06 AM       View Profile for bsquirrel   Email bsquirrel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for bsquirrel

-something and something else-
saddening sighs stir soundlessly from susan
seeking solace in the shapes of the sky.
something about something in the strewn sifted sand
stops her -- to shift songs, sanctify.
statues stand solemnly surrounding.
susan sits in the shadows and sulks.
silly sentiments -- silt and silken strands stand
for something else susan once felt.
soot and sunshine, solutions strayed and frayed like socks,
scattered stones sunken in the sea.
susan, she'll find a way to find a way to find
a sieve to scoop away the shadows; unsoiled, shell-less, free.
© Copyright 2000 MPC - All Rights Reserved
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


1 posted 01-28-2000 01:12 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

I like this, it made me stop to think
bsquirrel
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Member Rara Avis
since 01-03-2000
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2 posted 01-29-2000 12:42 AM       View Profile for bsquirrel   Email bsquirrel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for bsquirrel

Thanks, Hoot. Really, it was just me trying my hand at lots of s words. I sorta gave it up near the end, but enjoyed the challenge, anyway.

Mike
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


3 posted 01-29-2000 01:32 PM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Shucks, Mike-
I surely sorely skipped
seeing this simply succulent
savoring of S-words.

I love little exercises like this.
Tee Hee ... don't get me
started again !
~*Marge*~




 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


4 posted 01-29-2000 04:26 PM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

"seeking solace in the shapes of the sky."

...several striking lines in this piece, Mike, but this one in particularly drew me back for another read through. Liked this bunches. (o:

Claire
poetry_kills
Senior Member
since 12-04-1999
Posts 552
new orleans


5 posted 01-29-2000 05:36 PM       View Profile for poetry_kills   Email poetry_kills   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit poetry_kills's Home Page   View IP for poetry_kills

bsquirrel: i like this poem a lot... profound meaning and aliteration (on the same letter) all the way through.. WOW!... that's something i've honestly never seen before (much less attempted)... i commend you...
sincerely,
jerome the boy with the numb hands

 A savage place! as holy and enchanted
As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted
By woman wailing for her demon-lover!
~Coleridge
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 01-03-2000
Posts 8382


6 posted 01-30-2000 06:13 PM       View Profile for bsquirrel   Email bsquirrel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for bsquirrel

Glad you all enjoyed the poem. This was one of the poems I read last night at a reading (duh, what else do you do there?). SOmehow, I manged to get out eight poems in measured cadence in six minutes. I'm surprised I didn't stumble all over this one, or at least make the mic hiss.   Again, glad you liked it, and thanks for reading it!

Mike
 
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