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Open Poetry #5
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Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion

0 posted 2000-01-27 11:48 PM




Smoke

We watched the unreal scene,
shaken, shocked and cold.
Swift officials moved in
harmonious action.
I felt beholden
to the firemen,
police,
ambulance crews,
and marveled at their
commonality,
a mixture of
efficiency,
strength and
compassion.

Only an outer shell vestige,
smoke long diminished
a stench I’ll never forget.

The call came after midnight,
by then she was gone.
Detectives ruminating,
perhaps she had fallen asleep
while smoking,
or left a candle burning?

The coroner found
booze in her blood,
a lifelong pattern
of furtive drinking,
in the end, redemption.

She never heard the fire’s roar.

Someone once told me that the heat
sears the lungs immediately,
and death is rapid.
I allow myself this
belief.



© Copyright 2000 Corinne - All Rights Reserved
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

1 posted 2000-01-28 12:32 PM


Wow, and ouch.

Mike

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
2 posted 2000-01-28 01:05 AM


Absolutely speachless here
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
3 posted 2000-01-28 05:58 AM


Corinne-
This touches my heart.
Sadly, it touches my heart.
This feels very real.
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023
United Kingdom
4 posted 2000-01-28 10:08 AM


Corinne:  HUGS sweetheart

 Feed your dreams with love...

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
5 posted 2000-01-28 10:12 AM


Wow Corinne....!
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
6 posted 2000-01-28 10:17 AM


Corinne,
Well done, good construction and a good poem.

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
7 posted 2000-01-28 08:55 PM


Let's bring this wonderful work back for another round...
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
8 posted 2000-01-28 09:27 PM


Thank you, Mike, Hoot Owl, Marge, Rainbow, Toe, Seymore and Nan.

Corinne

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
9 posted 2000-01-28 09:39 PM


Corinne, this is so painful. I hurt reading this. You tell such a vivid story with your written word. -SEA
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
10 posted 2000-01-29 02:36 AM


Dear SEA,

thank you.  I was very hesitant to post this,
too much of a downer, I thought.

This woman wasn't a nice woman at all.  But no one deserves to go like that...

Corinne

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