How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Archives
 Open Poetry #5 Archive
 Building Walls
 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19
Follow us on Facebook

 This is an Archive. You may post a reply, but new topics are not allowed.

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

Building Walls

 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
Skyfyre
Senior Member
since 08-15-99
Posts 1966
Sitting in Michael's Lap


0 posted 01-26-2000 11:58 PM       View Profile for Skyfyre   Email Skyfyre   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Skyfyre

I built a wall about me, as refuge for my heart,
For, disenchanted with the world, I thought to live apart.
I thought to build it, first, of sand – a castle just for me –
But Love crept in like ocean waves, and swept it out to sea.
I fashioned it of oaken limbs, and thought my work was good --
But Love attacked with whetted axe – it split like firewood.
I settled next on solid stone – now surely, this would stay!
But Love whisked in with tireless winds, and whittled it away.
I crafted it of tempered steel – ‘twould certainly suffice!
But Love became a blazing heat, and melted it like ice.
At last, despairing and afraid, I built my wall of flame,
In desperate hope I'd found the thing not even Love could tame.
My fiery keep was never breached – now, lonely and in pain,
I stand, beseeching cloudless skies, and pray for Love to rain.



 Full fathom five thy father lies,
Of his bones are coral made,
Those are pearls that were his eyes;
Nothing of him that doth fade
But doth suffer a sea-change
Into something rich and strange...


--William Shakespeare, from The Tempest



[This message has been edited by Skyfyre (edited 01-27-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 Linda Anderson - All Rights Reserved
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


1 posted 01-27-2000 12:03 AM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

A poem does not get more finely crafted than this. Excellent metaphors strung together with dramatic effect. Very well done, Kess.
CrazyChick
Member
since 01-05-2000
Posts 134


2 posted 01-27-2000 12:07 AM       View Profile for CrazyChick   Email CrazyChick   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for CrazyChick

You did a great job writting this poem!!!!! It was very well written. I enjoyed it very much  
Rosemary J. Gwaltney
Senior Member
since 08-26-99
Posts 1064
northern mountains, Idaho


3 posted 01-27-2000 12:57 AM       View Profile for Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Email Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Rosemary J. Gwaltney's Home Page   View IP for Rosemary J. Gwaltney

Very deep and well written.  You are a very talented writer.
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


4 posted 01-27-2000 10:16 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Kess...this is perhaps one of the best poems I have had the honor of reading here or anywhere else. Your rhythm and rhyme are flawless. As Balladeer stated, your use of metaphores is great here. The over all flow and feel to this one is supurb. APPLAUDS!!!!
What a wonderful post
Mike
Member Elite
since 06-19-99
Posts 2528


5 posted 01-27-2000 10:21 AM       View Profile for Mike   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mike

Exceptional work...  a wonderful way to start the day, being able to enjoy this wonderful writing.
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


6 posted 01-27-2000 11:06 AM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Every poem you write outshines the previous one! This is absolutely wonderful!

Denise
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


7 posted 01-27-2000 11:43 AM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

What an ending! The more I read, the more I'm amazed by your talent. Keep the ink flowing!
Burke
New Member
since 01-27-2000
Posts 6


8 posted 01-27-2000 12:17 PM       View Profile for Burke   Email Burke   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Burke

Words, very beautifuly put together. I feel you. I wish you a blizzard to put out the flames!!!

Burke
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


9 posted 01-27-2000 09:26 PM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

This is a wonderful work, Kess... I absolutely love it.. It rings sooooo true...
How am I ever going to keep up with you???
Terrina Kethryveris
Member
since 12-06-1999
Posts 57
USA


10 posted 01-27-2000 09:48 PM       View Profile for Terrina Kethryveris   Email Terrina Kethryveris   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Terrina Kethryveris

Ah my friend you speak the words of my heart. Wonderful job and beautiful poem as always.  

Terri

 Truth be known, fantasy is much more appealing than reality.
wayoutwalt
Member Ascendant
since 06-22-99
Posts 5106
TEXAS (it's all big)


11 posted 01-27-2000 11:52 PM       View Profile for wayoutwalt   Email wayoutwalt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for wayoutwalt

kick toodly butt this one did i love it!!
Gene
Senior Member
since 01-23-2000
Posts 940
Colorado, USA


12 posted 01-28-2000 12:19 AM       View Profile for Gene   Email Gene   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Gene's Home Page   View IP for Gene

Skyfyre,

I'm new here and don't have the capability to respond to everyone that I'd like, but I feel compelled to respond to you. This poem is absolutely incredible--so beautifully written. It's one of the best I've ever read. It sings to me. This is what I aspire to and what inspires me to write poetry. I printed it out. This one's a keeper. WOW!

~Gene  
Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 08-02-99
Posts 9130
Purgatorial Incarceration


13 posted 01-28-2000 05:50 AM       View Profile for Christopher   Email Christopher   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Christopher

May the clouds o'er head bring forth such a deluge as the world's never seen.
Kess, the man who can capture your heart will find that he indeed has a treasure among treasures!
angel girl
Member
since 07-23-99
Posts 329
within a whisper...


14 posted 01-28-2000 06:47 AM       View Profile for angel girl   Email angel girl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for angel girl

This is beautiful. The rhyming was wonderful and the message was even better.

 One touch of nature makes the whole world kin.
-William Shakespeare

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 11-08-1999
Posts 9405
Pennsylvania


15 posted 01-28-2000 08:09 AM       View Profile for Elizabeth Santos   Email Elizabeth Santos   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Elizabeth Santos

Exceptional poetry
This is just splendid, but does not surprise me, coming from your poetic mind
What an extraordinary poem!
Liz
Lost Dreamer
Member Elite
since 06-20-99
Posts 2589
Normal, Illinois


16 posted 01-28-2000 08:41 AM       View Profile for Lost Dreamer   Email Lost Dreamer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lost Dreamer

Your talent shines with this poem like the shine of crystal mean't only to adore.
Auricom45
Junior Member
since 01-25-2000
Posts 19
Hialeah, Florida in the U.S.A


17 posted 01-28-2000 08:52 AM       View Profile for Auricom45   Email Auricom45   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Auricom45's Home Page   View IP for Auricom45

I'm new, so I try to gain insperation from the experienced, and you my friend have it. Excellent poetry and there couldn't be any finer. Keep up the great work, as I know you will.

Auricom

 That strange feeling we had in the war. Have you found anything in your lives since to equal it in strength? A sort of splendid carelessness it was, holding us together.

Skyfyre
Senior Member
since 08-15-99
Posts 1966
Sitting in Michael's Lap


18 posted 01-28-2000 02:19 PM       View Profile for Skyfyre   Email Skyfyre   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Skyfyre

I'm here, I'm here!  Sorry I haven't thanked you all sooner ...

Bal:  If I have indeed achieved the pinnacle of perfection, then there is naught left for me to do -- I beg of you, retract your kind statement that I might aspire again to greatness!  

Crazy Chick:  Thank you, from a kindred spirit!  

Rosemary:  Your compliment is humbling, madam -- I appreciate it deeply.

Ruth:  Considering the sheer volume of poetry you read each day, sweet angel, I must reply that I have never been so honored as to read such a glorious compliment in all my months here.  You have made my day -- no, make that my week!  

Mike:  Glad I could brighten your morning -- your work has often brightened mine.  

Denise:  That is my intent, my dear -- let me know if ever I fail!  

Master:  You are simply too kind, but I am eating it up! (hehehe)  

Burke:  Thank you as well.  

Nan:  You needn't keep up; I have been lucky enough to have a heart that is overflowing of late -- I cannot keep it inside!  

Terri:  and of mine, my friend, as you well know.  There are good reasons why we are best friends.  

walt:  woohoo!  I'm not sure what toodly butt is, but it sounds good to me!  

u_gene:  I am flattered that you spent a moment to give me your thoughts.  I will be looking for your work ...  

Liz:  (blushing)  My cup runneth over with such gracious praise ...  

Christopher:        You gotta stop saying such nice things to me, I might feel compelled to be NICE to you or something, and that would be no fun at all ...  

Angel girl:  Thanks muchly!  

Lost Dreamer:  What a poetic reply, I love it!  Might I use that line in a poem..?  

Auricom:  There is no greater praise than to hear that I have inspired someone.  Thank you so much for taking the time to tell me so!  

Smooches and hugs all (I'm feeling warm and fuzzy 'round the edges here),

--Kess

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


19 posted 01-29-2000 06:31 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

This is an exceptional poem, well crafted and thought out--lovely words, well--everything--great job!
Skyfyre will be notified of replies
 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Archives >> Open Poetry #5 >> Building Walls Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors