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Passions in Poetry

Fetus (version #1)

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Nate Dogg
Senior Member
since 11-15-1999
Posts 1691
Georgia, Fulton


0 posted 01-25-2000 02:28 PM       View Profile for Nate Dogg   Email Nate Dogg   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Nate Dogg's Home Page   View IP for Nate Dogg

I hope y'll like the poem.

I existed in my mommy's womb,
a month after conception.
By the end of the second month,
my heart was established in four sections.
Month three, I excitedly jerked my body
and flexed my tiny legs and arms.
Month four, I grew some more
and now I'm bigger than before.
Month five, I growed by a few more inches,
as I increased my hearing senses.
By month six, I was kicking my mommy's cervix.
By month seven, I can taste the sweet food,
that mommy's feeding me
and I think that I'll become a sugar junkie,
once I get out of my mother's body.
By month eight, my lungs are steadily increasing,
causing to to have an easier time breathing.
By the end of the ninth month, I shall be out
and ready to experience,
first-hand what life is all about.

PS. If any of you think I left a lot to be desired,
don't worry because, I'm working on a deeper version.

 Nathan
© Copyright 2000 Nate Dogg - All Rights Reserved
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


1 posted 01-25-2000 03:01 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Well, you've certainly covered the basics here, Nate. Can't wait to see the deeper version!  

Denise
Ted Reynolds
Member
since 12-15-1999
Posts 335


2 posted 01-25-2000 03:13 PM       View Profile for Ted Reynolds   Email Ted Reynolds   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Ted Reynolds

Obviously a labor of love!

What about calling it simply "The Miracle"?
RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


3 posted 01-25-2000 05:33 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

I have to say I'm smiling here because to spend the time makes me think you're in love with children...ok, maybe not but I'm still smiling and LOL @ sugar junkie...

HUGS

 Don't ask me where I'm going, just listen when I'm gone and far away you'll hear me singing softly to the dawn.

Nate Dogg
Senior Member
since 11-15-1999
Posts 1691
Georgia, Fulton


4 posted 01-25-2000 05:56 PM       View Profile for Nate Dogg   Email Nate Dogg   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nate Dogg's Home Page   View IP for Nate Dogg

Thank you Denise, I promise that it will be a good one.
Thank you Ted for your nice comments.
Thank you Rainbowgirl, for your nice comments also.

 Nathan
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