navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #5 » I Miss You
Open Poetry #5
Post A Reply Post New Topic I Miss You Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you

0 posted 2000-01-21 12:15 PM



How can I tell you
where do I begin
I miss you
not the walls you hide in

I miss you
But how do I explain
I don't miss the heartache
I don't miss the pain

I don't miss the fighting
or the troubles that we've had
I miss us just being happy
my heart feels sad

I miss the way
we were supposed to be
-us against the world-
not you against me.

© Copyright 2000 S.E. A - All Rights Reserved
spiked
Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873
Hammond, La USA
1 posted 2000-01-21 12:30 PM


I can relate to your poem.
Seems love changes sometimes and we long for what was.

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
2 posted 2000-01-21 12:50 PM


Excellent final stanza
"I miss the way
we were supposed to be
-us against the world-
not you against me."
Like that a lot  


Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
3 posted 2000-01-21 02:33 PM


You know I hate to follow Ruth. she and I are so very much in tune in our thinking. I too love the last stanza. Wonderful piece!  
One Who Understands
Member
since 2000-01-20
Posts 251
Cedar Rapids, Iowa
4 posted 2000-01-21 04:02 PM


Great poem.  I am always comforted by reading such a soulful pience...thank you
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

5 posted 2000-01-21 05:01 PM


This is wonderful, SEA. I'm sure many can relate to this! Well done!

Denise

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
6 posted 2000-01-21 05:03 PM


Simply elegant.


Corinne

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
7 posted 2000-01-21 05:07 PM


I like that last stanza, too.  I also like the theme, love lost, wondering how things got turned around.  Nice subject.  Great approach.

Marilyn - you gotta be fast if you're gonna beat Hootessa.

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #5 » I Miss You

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary