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Passions in Poetry

looks like rain

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Kevin
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 11-02-1999
Posts 752
Torrington, Ct, Usa


0 posted 01-21-2000 12:40 AM       View Profile for Kevin   Email Kevin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Kevin

welcome back to town old friend
why donít you get out of the rain
it seems like it was last week when
I kicked  you out of my heart, pain.

and here you are with plans to stay
so soon your bags have been unpacked
and nothing to you I can say
to keep this weary heart intact

so dry off here, you might as well
its not like you will soon subside
youíll be here long, I can tell
for tears are pouring hard outside.
© Copyright 2000 Kevin Bednarz - All Rights Reserved
Astraea
Member
since 11-09-1999
Posts 397
California! Yeah! Okay, I'm


1 posted 01-21-2000 12:50 AM       View Profile for Astraea   Email Astraea   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Astraea

Wow.  I love this one.  Simple, to the point, and beautifully written.  Lovely!

~Astraea

 "Sometimes stars can only be seen in darkness."

"Sorrow's crown of sorrow is remembering happier things."


One Who Understands
Member
since 01-20-2000
Posts 252
Cedar Rapids, Iowa


2 posted 01-21-2000 01:26 AM       View Profile for One Who Understands   Email One Who Understands   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for One Who Understands

Wonderful corralation between tears and rain
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


3 posted 01-21-2000 01:27 AM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

This is so sadly touching...pain is a pain, isn't it? Just never knows when to leave!

Good one, Kevin!!  

Denise
Nicole
Senior Member
since 06-23-99
Posts 1896
Florida


4 posted 01-21-2000 01:35 AM       View Profile for Nicole   Email Nicole   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Nicole

So sad and helpless, you've written this very well.  

 May I never be too busy to help another's load,
Then I'll be drinking from the saucer 'cause my cup has overflowed.

--Author Unknown
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


5 posted 01-21-2000 02:08 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Well written, but terribly sad  

 At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet. ~Plato
Rosemary J. Gwaltney
Senior Member
since 08-26-99
Posts 1064
northern mountains, Idaho


6 posted 01-21-2000 03:13 AM       View Profile for Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Email Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Rosemary J. Gwaltney's Home Page   View IP for Rosemary J. Gwaltney

Kevin, you astound me, poem after poem.  I am beginning to think that you are really seventy years old, and are posting a picture from your teens.

You couldn't possibly have such talent, speaking deeply as though from a long life, and so eloquently, with a knowledge of so much pain, if you were really that young!

Excellent poem whatever your age.
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


7 posted 01-21-2000 07:12 AM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Kevin-

What saddness seems to
come in your rains.
May you find a bright umbrella
to shelter you until the rays
of love shine brightly upon you.

~*Marge*~

 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Parker
Member Elite
since 01-06-2000
Posts 3135
... the old black rum


8 posted 01-21-2000 11:55 AM       View Profile for Parker   Email Parker   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Parker's Home Page   View IP for Parker

I agree with Rosemary, there on old guy behind that picture, you couldn't be that young. I don't think you've admitted your age anywhere have you. This is so good. I love how you put so much meaning into so few words.

parker
Kevin
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 11-02-1999
Posts 752
Torrington, Ct, Usa


9 posted 01-21-2000 09:46 PM       View Profile for Kevin   Email Kevin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kevin

Seventeen in body, seventy in mind =)

thanks for the replies guys

sometimes i read my poetry and swear to my grave that I couldnt have written it,
its like there are two me's =)

but i assure you, im not even considered an adult till this august, i cant even go in the adult forum! lol

such is life
~ViXeN~
Member
since 01-09-2000
Posts 95
Guelph, Ont. Canada


10 posted 01-22-2000 12:27 AM       View Profile for ~ViXeN~   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for ~ViXeN~

Kev, this one is sad!
i like it but it breaks my heart to know that you are feeling like this!
shannon
 
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