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To The Paramour

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simplyYRREHS
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since 01-03-2000
Posts 163


0 posted 01-19-2000 01:35 PM       View Profile for simplyYRREHS   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for simplyYRREHS

*Hindsight, as I've now come to know on a very personal basis, is poison.  With this running through my veins, for almost a year now, closure is finally omnipresent, even here in my writings.  I dedicate THIS to the person who initiated my journey into singlehood.


TO THE PARAMOUR

Confussion landed upon me that day-
I remember the perfect irony of the sweet scent of spring tickling it's way into my thoughts.
Green was the air, thanks to mother nature's annual routine.
The fields were alive with such refreshness and hope.

Enter the voice.

Shattering the still of season's change.
Her voice oblitterated any solace within safe range.
Completely, wrecklessly, immediately the world emptied of gravity's force.
My self waited patiently in a lofty state, deciding what to adhere to.

I spent what seems a lifetime wondering how to become you.
How do I inflict such horrors into another person's soul?
How do I become so self-indulgent and deny my conscience room to feel shame?
I've wasted too many thoughts on "how's" and "why's" and finally realize that I should have approached you with these questions in the very beginning.
I cannot speak for you, or assume, the reasoning behind your destruction.

It is time I release this poison from within.

I don't care to know you and I don't dare claim to understand.
It pleasures me to no end, knowing I could never be you.
Never before have I placed myself upon a pedestal, but I do now with newfound pride.
Thanks to you, I hold a very honorable chair.
No higher than the one you sit in, but in a different arena-
a different class-
a different world.

It satisfies me to let go of the pain you handed to me last spring and to know I have lost no battle, because there never was a fight.
For my soldiers are called "morals and ethics"
and yours are nameless
faceless
and meaningless.
Therefore, there never was a confrontation to be settled.
YOU were never present
and there never was a prize.




 "Heaven is under our feet as well as over our heads." ~Henry David Thoreau






[This message has been edited by simplyYRREHS (edited 01-19-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 Sherry - All Rights Reserved
Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


1 posted 01-19-2000 02:05 PM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

Excellent free verse. Strong message. The awakening of one's self so many times comes from what seems, at the time, like defeat in its greatest measure. You've written this into mythos.

Claire
fc
Member
since 01-18-2000
Posts 131


2 posted 01-19-2000 02:16 PM       View Profile for fc   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for fc

very very good....your ending the perfect exclamation point...
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


3 posted 01-19-2000 02:43 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Well written free verse Sherry, but in those situationa, there are always two at fault. I'm sorry for your loss  
simplyYRREHS
Member
since 01-03-2000
Posts 163


4 posted 01-19-2000 04:17 PM       View Profile for simplyYRREHS   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for simplyYRREHS

Thanks, meadow and fc and hootowl!  I'm glad the length and style of this writing did not close your eyes.  It is nice to finally step out of the story and view it from atop the heap of mess.  Never before have I been so empowered with self-worth, after having lost sight of me for a time.  Hoot ~ you are perfectly correct, and most of my energy, until now, has been directed at only one half of the devious pair.  Feels good to address the other side now, and very freeing.

Sherry
SnglDad
Member
since 01-08-2000
Posts 121
Seattle area


5 posted 01-19-2000 05:18 PM       View Profile for SnglDad   Email SnglDad   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SnglDad

Wow,
I guess you have come out huh?
This was one that I had to read twice to
understand it all.
Sherry you seem to have broken out from behind that shield.
I sure hope so.
Again you have done a great job Sherry  
Thanx For Sharing and God Bless
                       Joel


[This message has been edited by SnglDad (edited 01-19-2000).]
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


6 posted 01-19-2000 10:31 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

This is excellent, Sherry! Good for you!! It sure feels good, doesn't it?!  

Denise
 
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