los banos, ca,
I see this perfect family,
Laid out before my eyes,
And somehow unwillingly,
I take it by surprise.
That you seem so happy,
Like the smile I never knew,
I always told myself you missed me,
But I wonder was it true?
Looking into eyes,
That match my own so perfectly,
But the family here is not my own,
And it doesn’t seem quite fair to me.
These photographs are all that remains,
Of my father and his “life,”
I feel the tears inside me rise,
And close my eyes so tight.
As if to shut the image out,
It reflects to many memories,
That through the years I loved you so,
Still you built a life without me.
An image left on paper,
A man that’s laid to rest,
A father and an angel,
To whom I was a guest.
But not a cherished daughter,
At least the way I should have been,
Despite all the pain his memories have caused,
I will forever love him.
Dedicated to my Daddy, Gary Lynn White 1961-1993
[This message has been edited by amber (edited 01-17-2000).]